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Confrontations
Emily started her search for Luke at his apartment. She knew the club liked to have road trips on Saturdays, but she thought she'd try anyway. There was no answer at his door, but she expected that. Still, she couldn’t help the twinge of disappointment settling in her chest.
She had no idea how Luke would take the news. A part of her hoped that he’d be happy, but she had to be realistic. Emily and her child would be a responsibility that he did not want.
That was too bad.
Every time except the last two they made love, he was careful. There was even that one time in his apartment that he pulled out before he came, and then declared he’d always take care of her. Well, that went out the window when things got too hot for either one of them to think clearly.
She had no idea which time created their child, either that frantic love making before Gibs was shot, or that time in the funeral home, but neither one of them took measures to prevent a pregnancy. That was on both of them. Luke would just have to step up for his part.
If he didn’t want her, she’d live with that. It tore her heart to shreds when she thought of it, but she couldn’t make him want her. However, she wasn’t going to let him ignore his child. The baby deserved more than that.
The next place she didn’t want to go to, but it was necessary. If there was any place that Luke would be after a road trip, it was the Red Bull. She’d never been there, and never expected she would, though she, like every other person who travelled the main drag, would drive right past it.
Her stomach quivered as she stepped out of her car. Time felt like it slowed as she put one foot in front of the other. The door loomed in front of her but she could not bring herself to grab the handle.
“You’re overreacting,” she told herself. “It’s just a bar.”
But the problem was that it wasn’t just any bar, but the place where Luke hung out. People would know him there and they didn’t know her. She had no idea what type of reception she could expect.
The door swung open suddenly, and she jumped back, startled.
“Sorry,” said a leather-clad biker. A woman hung off his arm.
“It’s okay,” said Emily. Screwing up her courage she walked inside. People milled about or sat at booths that lined the walls. In the center was the bar. She walked toward it feeling like she walked as carefully as she would on broken glass. Deciding to sit at the bar, she took an empty stool. A thin, dark-haired man moved quickly from one end of the bar to the other, pouring drinks and handing them off. For some reason, he reminded her of Saks.
“What will you have, miss?”
“A ginger ale.”
His eyebrows rose. “Not a drinker.”
“Not now.”
“Then you waiting on someone?”
“Yeah, I guess you can say that. Has Luke Wade been in tonight?”
The bartender smiled. “Luke? Well, I don’t expect him tonight. He’s got a shindig going over at his shop. They are opening a new clubhouse he built there.”
“Oh,” said Emily. “I guess I’m in the wrong place then.”
“I wouldn’t say that. If you hung around, a looker like you wouldn’t be lonely long.”
Emily smiled faintly. “Thanks. But I have to go.”
“Well, come back any time.”
“Thanks.” She walked out of the bar more disappointed than ever. There was so much about Luke’s life she didn’t know anything about. That bartender acted like women asked about Luke all the time, and they probably did. And why wouldn’t they. Luke was a handsome man and any woman would want him. She got in her car and sat inside, fighting the tears in her eyes. It’s only been three months, but he seemed to have moved on just fine.
Why couldn’t she?
She loved him that was why. She’d never been able to move on, not since high school and definitely not now. She hugged her stomach. In her mind she cradled in her arms the reminder of how much she loved Luke. If this child was all she could have of Luke, then that would have to be enough. She knew then that giving this child up was not an option. She was keeping him... or her.
Maybe one day she’d find a way to move on.
But not until after she confronted the bastard who broke her heart.
––––––––
As she drove from the Red Bull to Luke’s shop, she grew more nervous. She’d been to two places already looking for him and came up empty. Now that she knew she was actually going to face him, the tension was giving her a headache and making her anxious.
Her stomach rumbled, and she started to feel sick because she hadn’t eaten. Reluctantly, she pulled over to a fast food restaurant and went through the drive-thru for a burger and a soda. Parking in the parking lot she took a bite of her burger and immediately lost her appetite.
“What’s wrong, kid,” she said, patting her stomach, “don’t like hamburgers?”
Her mother had told her and her sister how when she was pregnant what she wanted to eat was different for each child. With Emily she craved fatty foods but with Angela all she wanted was salads.
“Well, you’ll have to put up with it. I don’t have time or money to get something else. That’s something you’ll have to get used to, kid. We’ll never be a rich family."
Emily’s stomach settled as the first sips of her Coke and bites of her burger went down. Gradually she felt better. She could see she’d have to be more careful in her diet from now on. She hadn’t seen Luke in three months so she had to be almost through her first trimester. She was going to need to see a doctor and get an OB. She’d have to figure everything out. She could do it on her own, she’d be fine.
Feeling stronger and better than she had in a long time, she started the car.
The last few miles to Luke’s shop seemed to take forever. She turned on the radio and the song playing reminded her of her relationship with Luke. The words spoke of a love confused by a lack of communication. It pleaded for the other person to say something so the singer didn’t have to guess what was going on. It struck Emily that she was guilty of this. She failed all her life to say or do what she really wanted.
Emily knew instinctively why she’d done this. If she tried to say what she felt, or what she wanted, she got shut down immediately by her parents. Maybe it was, as her mom said, a misguided effort to protect her. But it was wrong, an injustice she felt from her earliest years. What were they afraid of? That she’d turn out like a father she never knew?
She sighed. She was going to stop blaming others and start moving forward on her own.
She wouldn’t let what happened to her happen to her child. She’d love everything about him or her, good and bad. She’d love the child enough for two parents, if she had to.
She spied the sign for Luke’s shop and turned into the parking lot. Looking around, she saw some people walking toward the back of the building. Emily parked her car and followed them.
People seemed gathered to the left of the building. Long-haired bikers with beards in leather cuts and jackets leaned against a Quonset hut with paper plates of food in hand. Women sat at picnic tables set to the left. Emily looked around but did not see Luke.
She didn’t see Saks either, which she thought was strange. Finally, she noticed a man who was with Luke at Gibs’ funeral. He tended the fire pit, cutting off pieces from the pig spit-roasted there. Emily grabbed a paper plate and waited in line until she got to the pit.
He looked at her with surprise. “Emily? What’re you doing here?”
“I’m looking for Luke.”
“He’s not here.”
“But I was told—"
The man took the plate from her hand roughly and leaned toward her.
“You NEED to leave.”
“Why?”
“Because Luke doesn’t want you here,” the man hissed. “Now leave, before I make you.”
“I need to speak to Luke,” said Emily angrily. “I’m not leaving—”
“What’s going on here?” asked a rough voice behind her. He stepped around so Emily could see him.
“An uninvited guest, Aces.”
The large man’s eyes traveled over her body licentiously. She didn’t like the looks of him with his scraggily hair and beard. The patches on his leather vest looked nasty too.
“I don’t know, Pepper. She looks pretty inviting to me.”
“I think I’ll leave now,” Emily said, feeling a prickling sensation at the back of her neck. She understood what Pepper was trying to warn her about a moment earlier. Aces was trouble. A bigger, badder version of Evan.
“Don’t go. I’d like to get to know you better.”
“Aces,” said Pepper in a desperate voice, “Luke won’t like it. He used to go with her.”
“Well, the operative words are ‘used to’ aren’t they, Pepper?”
“Listen,” said Emily, hating the fear trembling inside of her. “I just need to talk to Luke. I’ll come by the shop later.” She tried to move past Aces.
He grabbed her arm roughly. “I say, you’re staying.”
She wrenched her arm out of his grasp just as the sound of Harleys rumbled into the parking lot. Everyone turned to the sound. Ten Hispanic men and bikes streamed through the gate.
“Fuck!” called Aces. “Rojos! Everyone, get into the clubhouse.”
Pepper grabbed Emily’s hand and ran with her to the clubhouse. He pulled a chair out for her to sit on. The room was dark, lit only by blue neon spots that washed the curved walls. More light came from the bar, lit overhead by a row of modern black track lights that shown into the mirrored wall. Glass shelves where hung across the front of the mirror that held various bottles of liquor. Further into the room were three pool tables and a huge painting of the Hades’ Spawn club patch. Only, it was different from what Emily saw before.
Pepper looked out the door. Two other men crowded next to him with guns in their hands.
“What’s going on, Pepper?”
“Aces is talking to them.”
“Fuck you!” called Aces and the men on bikes drew their guns. He turned and ran into the building, breathing hard. “Shut the fucking door!”
“What’s going on, Aces?” said Pepper.
“Fucking Rojos! That’s Waterbury and Westfield out there. They’ve got Saks, and they say they’ll kill him if we don’t back off.”
“Fuck them!” said one of the other men. "What do we care? He left the club."
“My sentiments, Dagger,” said the other guy holding a gun. “But we can’t let them disrespect the club, and right now that's what they are doing.”
“We won’t,” said Aces grimly. “Ladies, get to the back of the club behind the pool tables, and whatever you do, keep your heads down. You, you, you, and you,” Aces said, pointing to some other bikers as the women moved to the back of the clubhouse. “Go out the back, circle around and cover the flanks. Dagger and Flint,” he said, pointing to two others, get to the roof and give us some cover. We’re going to give these fuckers a lesson they’ll never forget.”
Aces stopped and looked at Emily. “What are you waiting for, sweetheart? Bullets are going to start flying any minute. You don’t want to be in the fucking line of fire. Get your pretty ass over by the pool tables!”
Emily winced as he spoke to her. She knew she was in shock. It felt like being rocketed back to Gibs’ house only months before. She couldn’t move.
Pepper ran over and pulled her to her feet, pushing her toward the other women. “Keep your head down, Emily. This isn’t a joke.”
