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December 16, 2018

Dear Mace,

I’m not even sure why I’m writing to you.

Well, that’s not entirely true. I’m writing to you at the behest of Jeremy, my therapist. I asked for mood stabilizers, but instead he gave me a writing assignment. In our initial sessions, I struggled to articulate my story aloud, afraid to touch the fire in my belly. Afraid it would burn me up. I needed an easier way to explain what happened. So I shared my writing with him. All my thoughts to you. I told him this document was, at times, my only reason for living.

Which is why he suggested I continue this correspondence. To make peace with you, with myself, with my family, with my own spirit. And I suppose it’s no coincidence that I’m writing this on the one-year anniversary of your death.

I miss you, Mace.

—Jonah