Doctor Bodie reflected on how surprising it was to see Bailey Pike back in his office. Considering her general reticence on previous occasions, the fact that she had voluntarily booked an appointment with him marked a significant turning point in her progress.
‘You know, I’m over the moon to see you here, Bailey. To have decided to come here of your own accord, that’s a big deal.’
She was sitting opposite him, arms crossed, her hair hanging down in its customary way over the left side of her face. She smiled thinly at him in that impenetrable way of hers.
‘I’ve been thinking about what you were saying last time,’ she began, ‘and I thought it made sense to come and chat to you about it.’
‘I’m glad you finally feel ready to open up. Talking is the best form of therapy after all.’
‘Last time I was here, you mentioned post-traumatic stress disorder. I just wanted to understand a bit more about it.’
At last, she was taking steps to acknowledge her condition. Maybe today he’d get to find out how she had got that nasty scar. He flexed his knuckles with relish.
‘I’m very pleased you asked, Bailey. Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD as it’s commonly known, happens to be one of my specialist areas. It can affect anyone who’s undergone a particularly traumatic experience.’
‘Like a combat veteran, for example?’
He sensed that she was deflecting, not quite wanting to talk about her own situation just yet.
‘Yes. Precisely. They often suffer from the symptoms. Nightmares, amnesia, flashbacks…’
He paused and studied her for a few moments. He spoke gently.
‘If you’re suffering from these kinds of symptoms, Bailey, and I suspect that you are, based upon what you said in our last session, then the first step in getting rid of them is to try and talk about the experiences which caused them. Shall we do that?’
She dropped her head and chewed her knuckle. She appeared to be thinking about something. Then she looked up at him.
‘Could a person do something in a flashback that they wouldn’t normally do, perhaps even be unaware of?’
‘By all means. Flashbacks are dissociative by their very nature.’
He wondered what she was getting at.
‘In cases of really serious trauma,’ he added, ‘people can even fall subject to conditions such as dissociative identity disorder.’
‘Dissociative identity disorder?’
‘Sometimes known as split personality. A most fascinating condition, from a clinical viewpoint, but not so pleasant for the person experiencing it.’
She moved closer, onto the edge of her seat. He could see that she was very interested, but he wasn’t sure why because he was fairly certain that she herself didn’t suffer from dissociative identity disorder.
‘Tell me more about it,’ she said.
‘I feel we’re moving off-topic here, Bailey. This session is supposed to be about you.’
‘Doctor, I’ll get round to talking about myself soon enough. I promise.’
‘Well… it’s not unknown for the personality structure to fragment as a result of particularly traumatic experiences.’
‘Fragment? How?’
‘It breaks into two or more sub-personalities – distinct identities with their own individual patterns of thinking and behaviour. All the bad stuff that the person experienced or did during the traumatic experience is compartmentalised into one of these sub-personalities.’
‘And that sub-personality could suddenly take over?’
‘Yes. It’s like a severe form of flashback. It would probably be triggered by some kind of environmental cue or stressor. During this state, the sub-personality takes control of the person’s behaviour.’
‘Is the person aware that this is happening?’
‘Sometimes they are, sometimes they aren’t.’
He watched her as she sat there digesting what he’d just told her.
‘Thank you, Doctor Bodie,’ she said. ‘That’s very interesting. You’ve been most helpful.’
She started to stand up.
‘Wait a minute!’ he said. ‘You said you’d talk about yourself.’
‘I will, Doctor. Next time.’
She turned and left the office, closing the door behind her.
He clenched his fist in frustration. Why did he get the funny feeling she’d been using him in some way?
She truly confounded him. Doctor Bodie had seen hundreds, if not thousands, of inmates over the considerable time he’d spent as a psychologist in the prison system, but, out of all of them, Bailey Pike had to be one of the most puzzling he’d ever come across.