Chapter 3

‘Nicholas, it’s time for me to leave!’

‘Leave? Why ever would you mention anything about leaving?

‘And I thought you had come in to see me in my office because you wanted an additional lesson from me. I know how you love to learn,’ Nicholas teased, as he got up from his seat behind her desk and walked over to embrace her, his eyes bearing the mischievous wicked twinkle that Victoria had become very familiar with. She was very aware on what subject Nicholas wanted to teach her! But she used all her mental strength to resist him as she pushed him away almost roughly, as she blushed at his words. She tried to wipe out the visions of their hot passionate love sessions they both enjoyed, especially the one they had shared in this current room when he had placed her against the desk she was now gazing upon and had bent her over—

Victoria swallowed hard. She was not prepared for how difficult this would be.

‘Sorry, Nicholas, I cannot do this anymore....you said I could go when you taught me to be a lady, and you have given me teachers to instruct me on how to be a lady, as well as your own tutelage. It was very kind of you. You kept your word, but now I want to go!’

Nicholas stepped back from her; he looked both angry and crushed at receiving her plea to leave. ‘So you want to go you, ungrateful girl, and not even bearing a thought about me? So what was I then to you? I was only teasing you before, but maybe I am right and you only used me to learn about men before you ventured off to use your new skills on others!’

‘How dare you!’ Victoria turned to walk away, not having the energy and mental strength to fight with him; it had already taken a lot for her to confront him directly.

‘Victoria, I am sorry for my harsh words,’ Nicholas said more softly. ‘I am just angry and confused. I don’t know why you have to leave. I thought we were getting on well...really well, that we had an understanding, a setup that we both thoroughly enjoyed.’

‘That’s just it; I don’t want an understanding with you! My mother had an understanding with your father, and I saw what it did to her. She was always waiting, longing for your father, and when he came to see her, she was always overjoyed, as was I! But then he would be gone for long lengths and it would leave her so very low in spirits that there were days on end when she would not leave her bed, unable to take that she had no say or control of how he was able to come and go, in and out of her life. All her life was planned around him. I do not want the life my mother had as a mistress. If I should be with a man, I want to know that I am the only one for him, and him for me. Perhaps I am being selfish and unrealistic; perhaps I am asking too much, but that is what I want, and that is what I promised myself I would have, should I be with a man.’ Victoria confessed to Nicholas all the thoughts that had been on her mind since they had started their passionate affair.

‘Victoria, I do not think you are asking for too much, but I don’t want you to leave either!’

‘But don’t you understand? I cannot stay here with you, not with what I promised myself so long ago!’ Victoria tried to hold back her tears.

Nicholas went to embrace her in his arms and Victoria let him, not having the willpower to push him away again.

‘Please, my wonderful, beautiful Victoria, do not cry. I do not want you to be my mistress. I will not force you.’

‘Thank you, ‘Victoria sniffed, but pain still remained within her heart.

‘But I want you to be my wife!’

Victoria stared up at him in shock. ‘No, Nicholas, I am not asking for that. You are a Marquess! You cannot marry me!’

‘Yes, I am a Marquess, but it is I who chose whom I marry. And, in any case, I will have no one else; for there is no one else I can and will love as much as I do love you.’

Victoria looked at him with wonder and pure joy showing in her eyes. ‘I love you too, Nicholas, with all my heart,’ she said, making her feelings clear to him, ‘but I fear that I am not lady enough for you.’

‘Don’t worry. With all your lessons and instructions, you are more than lady enough. You could sit at the King’s table and no one would know any different. But, in any case, who said I was just looking for a lady to be by my side? The other part of you that you show only to me I find very alluring and fascinating indeed, and I crave that part of you every night.’ Nicholas smiled as he brought her to him and bent down to kiss her.

Victoria went all giddy and warm inside, knowing that if Nicholas kept up his arduous attention towards her, he would be very much in luck and bring out the side of her that he was so eagerly waiting to appear!

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