Often a man is unable to see a girl alone. He then cultivates her nurse’s daughter with pleasing things and favours. She pretends that she does not know him at all, but gets the girl attracted to his qualities, emphasizing those she is bound to like. She also dwells on such defects of other suitors that are contrary to the girl’s own wishes, and on her parents’ greed, their inability to recognize merit and the casual attitude of her kinsfolk. She tells her about Shakuntala and others, even girls of her own class, who found husbands by their own efforts and lived with them happily. Giving examples from great families, where girls are oppressed by co-wives, hated, made miserable and abandoned, she talks of the man’s love for her, of her future with him and of the faultless happiness of being his sole wife.
(1–8)
The confidante carries out all the functions of a go-between. After the girl’s feelings have been aroused she reasons with her to dispel any fear, anxiety or embarrassment she may still have. ‘That man can just pretend to kidnap you,’ she tells the girl, ‘and others can then be pursuaded to accept it fully.’
(9–11)
Once the girl has agreed and comes to the man for the rendezvous, he brings the sacred fire from the house of a priest who knows the Veda. Spreading the ritual kusha grass on the ground, he offers oblations into the fire in accordance with the scriptures and they walk round it three times in the act of marriage.
(12)
Her parents can then be informed. According to preceptors it is an established rule that a marriage witnessed by the sacred fire cannot be rescinded. And, after taking her maidenhead, the man gradually informs his own people. He so proceeds that the girl’s kinsfolk will accept their marriage, both to avoid any ignominy for her family and out of fear of any reprisals. Thereafter he satisfies them with pleasing gifts and affectionate behaviour. Or, he proceeds with a Gandharva marriage or union of love.
(13–18)
If the girl is hesitant, he pursuades another woman of her family, who is intimate with her and already knows and likes him, to conduct her on some pretext to an accessible place where he brings the fire from the Veda-knowing priest’s house and proceeds as earlier indicated.
(19–20)
If the girl is soon to be married elsewhere, he gets her mother to regret it by having her informed of the intended groom’s defects. With her consent the girl is then brought at night to a neighbour’s house where the man brings the fire from the priest and proceeds as earlier.
(21–22)
Or the girl may have a brother of the same age who is infatuated with some courtesan or another woman. The man cultivates him at length with pleasing gifts and help in his difficulties. Finally he tells him of his own desire. Young people are often prepared to stake even their lives for friends with similar dispositions, vices and ages. Thus he has the girl’s brother bring her for some other reason to an accessible place, and then proceeds as before.
(23–24)
On festivals like that of the eighth night of the waxing moon, the girl is plied with some intoxicating drink by her nurse’s daughter and taken on some personal pretext to a place accessible to the man. There he takes her maidenhead while she is drunk, and then proceeds as before.
(25)
After sending the nurse’s daughter away, he takes the girl’s maidenhead while she is alone, asleep and out of her senses, and then proceeds as before. Or, after coming to know that the girl is going to a park or another village, he goes with his servants and helpers, frightens away or kills her guards and abducts her. These are the other types of marriage.
(26–27)
For the maintenance of Dharma,
each preceding form of marriage
is better than that which comes next,
but if it is not possible, then
one may use the form which follows.
The fruit of every type of marriage
should be mutual love, and so
the good Gandharva is respected,
even though of middle rank.
It is indeed the best of all,
as giving pleasure, little trouble
and free of many rituals too,
its essence being mutual love.
(28–30)