| Author | SHEA SERRANO |
| Muse | LARAMI SERRANO |
| Illustrator | ARTURO TORRES |
| Editor | SEAN DESMOND |
| Castaway Expert | MALLORY RUBIN |
| Coco Expert | JIA TOLENTINO |
| Star Wars Expert | SEAN FENNESSEY |
| The Red Shoes Expert | MONICA CASTILLO |
| Misery Expert | WESLEY MORRIS |
| The Notebook Expert | AMANDA DOBBINS |
| The Best Man Holiday Expert | DOREEN ST. FELIX |
| My Sassy Girl Expert | DONNIE KWAK |
| Saving Private Ryan Expert | JASON CONCEPCION |
| Fresh Expert | JASMINE SANDERS |
| Researcher #1 | ANGELICA MARIA VIELMA |
| Researcher #2 | MIKE LYNCH |
| Researcher #3 | BOBBY WAGNER |
| Insight Guy | SCOTT TOBIAS |
| My Role Model | LARAMI SERRANO |
| The Love of My Life | LARAMI SERRANO |
| I Wanna Make Out With Her | LARAMI SERRANO |
| Bodyguards | THE FOH |
| King of Mortal Kombat | CALEB SERRANO |
| King of Basketball | BRAXTON SERRANO |
| King of Talking | PARKER SERRANO |
| I Love Them So Very Much | BRAXTON, CALEB, PARKER |
| Best Friend | MY DOG |
| Brainstormer | GARY GUTIERREZ |
| Brainstormer #2 | THE SUPER SECRET EMAIL CHAIN |
| Foreword | JOHN LEGUIZAMO |
| Afterword | DON CHEADLE |
| Foreword Connector | DAVID MINER |
| Afterword Connector | TOMMY ALTER |
| Mom | MY MOM |
| Dad | MY DAD |
| Sisters | YASMINDA, NASTASJA, MARIE |
| Editorial | RACHEL KAMBURY |
| Book Publicity | RACHEL MOLLAND |
| Book Publicity #2 | PAUL SAMUELSON |
| Book Marketing | BRIAN MCLENDON |
| Book Marketing #2 | ANDREW DUNCAN |
| Book Production | YASMIN MATHEW |
| Book Art/Design | JARROD TAYLOR |
| Book Lawyer | CHRIS NOLAN |
| Book Copy Editor | JUSTINE GARDNER |
| Life Changer | BILL SIMMONS |
| Role Model | SEAN FENNESSEY |
| Eternal Mentor | MARGARET DOWNING |
| Eternal Mentor #2 | CHRIS GRAY |
| Website | THE RINGER DOT COM |
| Favorite Movie | BLOOD IN BLOOD OUT |
| I Miss Him So Much | TIM DUNCAN |
| Magic Expert | PAT SCHUMACKER |
| Magic Unexpert | JUSTIN HALPERN |
| People I’ve Forgotten Because I’m Dumb | SO MANY |