Becca Finchley sat at the kitchen table sipping tea from a china mug. She tapped her pen on the page and stared at the rosettes that papered the walls. The dog on her lap stirred and sighed deeply before falling back to sleep. Becca began to fill out the form. Could she really do it without him? He’d want her to – that much she was sure of – but the thought of being there without him made the ache in her chest worse. She wondered if seeing everyone would just make things harder. They’d be lovely, of course, and sympathetic, but that wouldn’t bring her husband back.

The paperwork was due on Friday, along with the hefty entrance fee. But this was Chudleigh’s and maybe her last hurrah. As Becca signed her name on the bottom of the page, she heard the gate followed by the sound of running feet. The front door slammed as Daniel arrived home from school.

‘Mum!’ he shouted. ‘Where are you?’

‘In here,’ Becca called, and waited for the hurricane to reach the kitchen. Sure enough, seconds later, her only child flew into the room, his face shiny and red. He poured a glass of water and grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl before walking over to give her a kiss.

‘How was your day?’ he asked.

Becca grabbed him around the middle and pressed his face against hers. ‘All the better now that you’re here. What about yours?’

He shrugged and took a bite of the apple. ‘I came first in the Maths test.’

‘Well done. See, I told you studying would pay off.’ Becca raised her eyebrows at the boy as he walked to the pantry and opened the door.

Daniel grinned. ‘Yeah, but I wouldn’t want to make a habit of it,’ he teased.

He was a smart boy. They both knew it, but he’d changed since the accident. His teachers said that he was handling things well and making good progress but Becca worried that he was keeping up appearances for her sake. Some days he’d go for a run and disappear for hours. He’d come home exhausted and flop into bed, where he’d sleep fitfully. There were nights she would hear him crying. By the time she’d manoeuvre herself out of bed and into his room, he’d have stopped. It frightened her that he was bottling things up. The counsellor said it was just his way of dealing with what had happened and that he’d talk about it when he was ready, but it didn’t do much to put Becca’s mind at ease.

‘Did you walk up from the bus stop?’ she asked.

Daniel closed the pantry door and leaned against it, looking at her. ‘Mrs Bird gave me a lift.’

‘I hope you said thank you.’ Becca pushed the wheels of her chair backwards and swivelled around. The cavalier King Charles spaniel on her lap woke up with a start and jumped onto the floor, headed straight for the utility room. Becca wheeled herself to the stove and lifted the kettle.

‘I’ll do that.’ Daniel stuffed the apple into his mouth and took the kettle from her hands. He flipped open the lid and began to fill it.

‘Sweetheart, it’s okay,’ she said softly. ‘I have to do things for myself. I made a cup of tea at lunchtime and didn’t spill a drop.’

‘I don’t want you to,’ Daniel said. ‘What if Siggy knocks into you and you get burned? Or you fall out of the wheelchair? I don’t see why I can’t just stay at home and do my lessons with you.’

‘You’re already smarter than I am, Daniel. Anyway, you don’t want to be cooped up here with your boring old mother every day for the rest of your life.’

‘Don’t say that!’ Daniel snapped. He turned away from her and brushed angrily at his face.

Becca reached out and placed a hand on his arm. ‘Oh, honey, I didn’t mean to upset you. But you have to go to school – we can’t change how things are.’

Daniel stared out of the kitchen window. ‘I could have,’ he whispered. ‘I could have changed everything.’

Becca winced. ‘You know that’s not true.’

‘Yes, it is!’ Daniel said, shaking off her hand. ‘If I hadn’t gone to Grandpa’s, Dad would still be alive and you wouldn’t be in that stupid chair and we’d still have the dogs.’

‘Daniel, it’s not your fault. Come and sit down and we can talk about things.’

‘I don’t want to,’ he said, sucking in a deep breath. He could feel the anger surging. ‘I’m going for a run.’

‘Please, just stay here with me,’ Becca called after him, but Daniel was already gone.

She watched through the glass door as he jumped the low stone wall that separated their farmhouse garden from the open field and jogged off into the distance.