Myles hung up questioning if he was making a mistake, continuing to see Anna. She was so unlike the women he’d dated over the last dozen years she fascinated him. He was curious to know if she was a sleepyhead in the mornings or if she bound out of bed raring to face the day.
Did she prefer coffee or tea? The one time he’d brought coffee, she drank it black.
Did she like long walks? He was growing addicted to them. They made him feel better, even when he was tired afterward and needed to rest.
What were her routines? Her favorite activities? Did she like action movies? He and the men on the job sites loved fast-paced action films. He himself also enjoyed mysteries. Did Anna?
He frowned. He was getting too involved. Tiffany had been the epitome of a party girl—always out for a good time. The kind of woman he’d liked to date. She’d known the score—no commitment, no ties. His job over the last decade had not been suitable for any kind of long-term relationships.
But Anna was totally different. She was a forever kind of woman. And a devoted mother. Despite the difference, he liked her. Leaning against the pillows, he gazed out the window at the minuscule view from his room. Lights gleamed in the night. New York never slept. Rising, he went to stand by the window. He was too high to hear more than a low hum of sound from the street. The lights glittered from towers and apartments and, far below, from cars zipping along.
He wondered what Anna was doing right now. He enjoyed watching her expressions. She didn’t seem to hide a thing. When she laughed, her entire face lit up. But, more often than not, he’d caught her looking sad.
She didn’t deserve it. She and her husband should have had fifty or more years together. They’d adopted Zack in good faith. There were no guarantees on a happy ending in life, but he wished that for her. And Zack.
He walked to the small wet bar to get something to drink. The evening loomed long and lonely. He missed being on the job site where there was always work to be done or places to see. Guys to hang out with in the small bars that sprang up at all sites.
But even if he were back, he wasn’t sure that would suit him now. The land mine had changed his perspective on what was important. Or was it learning he had a son? He popped open the can and drank. Some of each, probably.
Now that he’d met Anna and Zack, heard the love in her voice, Myles knew his son was better off than he’d have been with Tiffany. She’d definitely not been the maternal type. If Tiffany had told him before she’d given birth, he’d have come home to take his child. But would it have worked out for the baby? A single guy working in a foreign locale? How would he have managed?
He knew Anna was an excellent mother. He could see Zack was doing fine. Another visit or two and then Myles would pull back. No sense getting too caught up in their lives. It’d make it that much harder to leave when the time came.
Thursday evening, when Anna returned home, Edith Wade had started supper for her. Zack ran to meet her, waving an envelope.
“You got a note from my teacher,” he said, jumping up and down.
Edith smiled as she gathered her things.
“I think he believes that is good news.”
“Are notes from teachers ever good news?” Anna asked as she slipped her finger beneath the flap and tore the envelope open.
“Not when I was teaching,” Edith said. “Good night, Zack. See you tomorrow.”
“’Kay,” he replied, his eyes full of excitement as he watched his mother pull out the sheet of paper.
Edith remained by the door, her curiosity clear.
“They need repairs to some of the schoolrooms and to the playground equipment,” Anna said as she skimmed the letter. “They’re asking all parents to lend a hand. Apparently, the school needs to come up to code on various things in order to keep going. If not, the city could shut them down.”
“What kind of help do they want?” Edith asked.
“Either monetary donation or actually physical participation. Gee, what should I do? Give them the extra seventeen dollars from my last paycheck, or go hammer nails, which I’ve never done, and thus probably could cost them more than any pittance I can give them.”
“I’m sure there are other things you can do. You could paint. Or clean up trash. Do they have a list of things needed?”
“It says each room has a list of tasks and goods needed. Could you check for me when you take Zack in tomorrow?”
“Sure. Are major renovations planned?”
“It says the full scope is listed in the classrooms. Maybe I should go in late and take him myself to see what’s needed.”
“I’ll see if they’ll give me a copy of what they have. I think they should have sent all that information to the parents.”
“Me, too, but they didn’t.”
Anna bid Edith goodnight and went to change into casual attire. Soon, she and Zack were sharing dinner. She delighted in hearing about his day. He knew some of the plans at the school because he talked about his classroom getting their bathroom fixed.
“I didn’t know it was broken,” she said.
“We have to use the bathroom in Mrs. O’Donald’s room. So we have to tell our teacher early when we have to go potty,” he said earnestly.
Anna nodded, thoughtful. She knew the building that the preschool operated from was old, but she’d never paid much attention to its state. If Edith couldn’t get a list of tasks needed, she’d call herself Friday afternoon.
How she’d manage another expense remained to be seen. She didn’t want to take Zack out of preschool if she could help it. It provided his only interaction with other children except for when he played at the park. But her money only went so far.
Myles leaned against the wall in the hallway outside of Anna’s flat Friday evening. Glancing at his watch, the second hand swept around another time. Myles had three more minutes until six-fifteen. He’d already been waiting for over eight minutes. Once six o’clock had arrived, he’d been hard-pressed to contain his impatience. They were all going out to dinner together, and he was very much looking forward to the experience.
It was close enough. He rang the doorbell.
A moment later, he heard Anna calling for Zack to wait. But the little boy was too exuberant. He flung open the door and beamed up at Myles.
“Hi.” Zack said. “We’re going to eat pizza.”
“I know,” Myles said, smiling down at the child.
He wanted to lift him up and hug him tightly. But caution was his watchword. He’d to take this one step at a time.
Anna came hurrying into the entryway.
“Zack. I told you not to open the door until I got here.”
“It’s Myles,” Zack said, as if he’d known beforehand.
“You didn’t know that. It could have been anyone.”
“It’s Myles.”
She shook her head and grinned at Myles.
“I don’t want to scare him with tales about ax murderers, but good grief, he can’t throw open the door every time someone knocks.”
“Zack, next time, ask who is there before opening the door. Okay, sport?” Myles said, stepping inside.
“’Kay,” the little boy said, running back to his room. “I’ll get my sweatshirt.”
Myles closed the door and looked at Anna. She wore slim slacks and a pretty green shirt. A sweater was slung over her shoulders. She looked a bit tired, but almost—happy to see him?
A man could hope.
“I’m a bit early,” he said.
“We’re almost ready. Come in and sit down. I’ll be right back.”
She fled down the hall after Zack. Myles stood where he was, listening to the murmur of voices, watching as Zack ran back toward him a moment later. Love filled him for this small child he scarcely knew. Had things been different, Zack would run toward him, calling Daddy.
In less than two minutes, they were in the elevator and on their way to dinner.
“This is such a delightful treat,” Anna said as they stepped into the early April evening.
Shadows filled the canyons of the streets. The air was cooler than it had been. He watched as she took a deep breath and seemed to relax before his eyes.
“Tough week?” he asked, glancing from her to Zack. His son had taken his mother’s hand and then reached for his. He looked up at Myles.
“Swing me,” he said.
“What?”
“Oh, Zack, not now. Myles isn’t up to that.”
“What?” he asked again.
“Zack likes to swing between two adults who are holding his hands. But it’s the last thing you need with a shoulder injury.”
“I don’t think swinging a little boy is going to put me back in hospital.”
“Is one side stronger than another?” she asked.
He shrugged. It felt odd to have someone concerned about him. He’d been making his way alone for a long time.
“So what do I do?” he asked.
“Hold on tight and on three, we’ll swing him forward and then back. One time, that’s all.”
Zack shrieked with laughter at his swing.
“Again.” he demanded.
“No, Zack. That’s it.”
Anna was firm.
Zack shot her a frown, then spied several pigeons ahead of them.
“Can I catch the birds?”
Anna laughed.
“No, we are on our way to dinner. What would you do with them while we ate pizza?”
Myles looked at her.
“He could catch them?”
“Of course not. Didn’t you ever chase pigeons when you were a kid? He thinks he can catch them and I don’t want to rain on his parade. Childhood is a fragile time. One to be cherished and to keep dreams alive as long as we can. We’re a long time adults.”
Myles wondered if she’d had dreams shattered before their time.
Then he remembered her husband. She’d lost him a year ago, decades before she should have. He didn’t like thinking about it. He couldn’t picture Anna married. Now that he knew her, he'd always remember her as she was tonight.
She was young, pretty, personable. She’d most likely find another man to love. He wondered who had been the one unable to make babies? Anna or her husband.
Perhaps another man would give her all the children he’d want. Myles shook his head, as if dislodging the image of her in the arms of another man. He watched the way she interacted with Zack. She’d be great with two or three more kids running around.
The pizza parlor was crowded. Families and teenagers on dates filled the space. There was a children’s section at the back, with one lone table still empty.
“I’ll grab that table,” Anna said, nodding and urging Zack onward.
They’d discussed what kind of pizzas they liked on the walk.
Myles ordered, getting a pitcher of cola and made it back to the table Anna had claimed. He glanced around. Zack was playing on one of the tot toys in the fake castle.
“He’ll be entertained until the pizza arrives,” Anna said, smiling at him when he set the pitcher down.
Slipping onto the bench opposite her, he nodded.
“I didn’t realize how noisy it would be.”
“Not a place for quiet discussions, that’s for sure,” she almost shouted. “Lots of energy and fun. Did you go out for pizza a lot as a child?” she asked.
He shook his head.
“Not until I was a teenager and bought my own. Many foster parents don’t have lots of money. They spend more on the children than the state pays. Most of them do it for love. Which means money is generally tight.”
“My mother is from an Italian family. She made pizza for us. I still think my mom makes the best pizza around. Next time she’s up, I’ll have her make you one. She loves to cook.”
Myles nodded, wondering how soon that might be.
That opened an entirely new line of thought. He hadn’t thought about grandparents in a long time. Not knowing his own parents, of course he’d not known any grandparents. Tiffany had been estranged from her own parents, but surely that breach would have healed with a grandchild? In the meantime, he was glad his son had grandparents from Anna.
Despite the noise and commotion constantly churning around them, Myles enjoyed the evening. He couldn’t say he and Anna had a meaningful conversation—it was too noisy for that.
Zack dashed back when the pizza was delivered to eat a few bites, then he was off again to play. The conversation was sporadic, Anna always keeping a careful watch on Zack.
“Does he know all those kids?” Myles asked, keeping an eye on the group of preschoolers enjoying the castle and tot toys.
“I don’t recognize any of them. But kids that age love to play with others. They haven’t started being shy or holding back. Having a child is a great way to meet others when moving into a new neighborhood.”
“Tell me about the world’s situation these days. No threats at the UN?” he asked.
Much as he was enchanted with his son, he wanted to get to know Anna better, too. He’d never met anyone before whom he considered connected to. She’d forever be the woman who started his son on the road to maturity, whatever the future held. And she was special in her own way. He wanted to learn everything he could, to think about in the future and remember.
He enjoyed watching her, how she gestured with her hands, the seriousness when she leaned forward to make a point, or the way her laughter rang out when she was amused. And though he knew she was talking to him, she continued to keep a careful eye on Zack. If he were injured or in trouble, she’d be there in an instant.
Nothing untoward happened. Zack had fun, and surprisingly, so did Myles. The pitcher had long been empty and the pizza only a memory when he reluctantly suggested they start for home.
“Oh, I didn’t realize how late it is. Zack usually goes to bed around eight. It’s almost nine. I’ve had such fun,” she said, almost in disbelief.
“That was the point, to have fun,” Myles said, glad he hadn’t been the only one enjoying himself.
“Then it worked. Help me corral my son?”
Zack resisted leaving, but Anna was firm. The walk back to the apartment wasn’t as fun as the outbound one had been because of a cranky child.
“Will he let me carry him?” Myles asked after a block.
“He might. I can manage, though,” Anna said.
“No. Myles carry me,” Zack said when his mother reached for him.
“No problem,” Myles said, swinging him up into his arms and holding him against his chest.
The heart was a funny thing. Myles didn’t think it could get any larger, but it felt as if it were swelling with love for this child he was only getting to know. Like must recognize like, and he knew he’d love Zack forever. Even if he never saw him again after this trip.
Anna tucked her hand in the crook of his elbow, and they walked in silence for another block. It felt right, Myles thought.
Like families he used to watch when he was a child. Longing for that special connection that joined father, mother and children, he felt the yearning again. Would he ever be part of such a family?
For a moment, the thought of making Anna and Zack his family flashed into mind. He’d have his son and a loving mother for that son. There’d be family gatherings on holidays and birthdays. He’d belong as he never had before. And his son would be secure all his life in love from his father and the only mother he’d ever known.
It was a perfect solution.
Myles caught his breath. It would work. He already enjoyed being with Anna. He thought she enjoyed being with him. Of course, it was too early to discuss marriage. But with a special courtship, could they both come to want the same thing? Marriage?
He couldn’t believe he even had such an idea. He’d never expected to marry. His work took him all over the world. And not to locations where he’d want a family. Maybe it was because he’d almost died in that land mine explosion. Was it a pie-in-the-sky notion, or one with serious merit?
A woman wanted more than a father for her fatherless son. She wanted to be wanted for herself.
Myles glanced down at Anna. She was pretty in ways that would last—not for her the flashy makeup and fleeting fashion statements his former girlfriend had embraced. She was nothing like Tiffany. She’d bring security to a marriage. He doubted Tiffany would ever have managed had she consented to marry him for their child’s sake.
Anna glanced up and smiled.
“Is he getting heavy?”
“Not at all. I’ve enjoyed tonight.”
More than He’d expected.
“Me, too.”
She squeezed his arm slightly and looked away, a slight smile on her lips.
When they reached Anna’s apartment, she invited him in.
“I’ll put Zack to bed and we can have some coffee, if you like,” she said, as she worked the key in the lock.
“Sounds great. I’d hate for the evening to end so soon,” he said. “I can help put him to bed.”
“You don’t need to.”
“Want Myles,” Zack mumbled, snuggling closer to the man who held him.
Anna laughed. “Okay, then. You have to get right into pjs and brush your teeth. No dawdling tonight. It’s late.”
“’Kay,” he said.
Myles carried Zack into his bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed. Anna handed him a set of pajamas and Myles set Zack on his feet and helped him take off the sweatshirt and T-shirt he wore. It wasn’t easy getting Zack to put on his pajama top; the child wanted to flop against him, already half asleep.
Finally, he was ready and Myles followed the two of them to the bathroom to watch Zack brush his teeth. Leaning against the doorjamb, he enjoyed the routine Anna and Zack had with his son standing on the closed toilet lid and first brushing his teeth by himself, then with Anna helping.
“All done,” he sang out when Anna had him rinse his mouth.
He jumped from the toilet, straight for Myles. Only his quick reflexes had him catch his son before the boy landed on the floor.
“Zack, don’t do that. It’s dangerous,” Anna scolded.
“Myles catched me,” he said, beaming.
Myles vowed to always be there to catch his son, if humanly possible.
“He’s fearless,” she said, shaking her head. “A little caution wouldn’t hurt.”
“Within reason,” Myles said.
“You don’t think I baby him too much, do you?” she asked uncertainly.
“Not that I can see. He’s learning independence, and that’s what parents want, right?” Myles asked, carrying Zack back to bed.
He laid him down and covered him.
“Read me a story,” Zack said, his eyes already drooping.
“Please,” Anna added.
“Please.”
Myles looked at the book Anna handed him.
“If you read, I’ll start the coffee,” she said.
Myles had never read to a child. He opened the first page, noting there were only two sentences on most pages. It wouldn’t take long to get through the book.
Before he was halfway to the end, Zack fell asleep.
Myles leaned over and kissed his cheek.
“Sleep well, little man.”
For several minutes, he just sat and gazed at this miracle—his son. His cheeks had a healthy color, his eyelashes skimmed the top of the pudgy cheeks. His chest rose and fell, scarcely moving the sheet and light blanket. Time seemed to stand still.
Finally, Myles rose and turned off the light. Did Anna close the door or leave it open? There was so much he still didn’t know about his own son. He left it open and headed for the living room.
“Your timing’s good—coffee’s ready. I have some cookies, too, but nothing fancy for dessert,” she said, bringing the coffee in on a tray. Macaroons were piled on a decorative plate. Napkins and mugs crowded in.
She’d switched on two lamps in the room, and opened the curtains to let in the night lights from the city. It was cozy. A far cry from the rented places he’d lived in over the last decade. Most were only a place to get mail and eat and sleep. No photographs crowded tables, no paintings hung on the walls. No toys dotted the floor.
Anna had made a home for herself and Zack even in this small, old apartment. Something Myles envied.
If they married, he’d be included in her home. It was an odd feeling.
Glancing at the photographs of her husband, he wondered if he had a chance of getting her to let go of the past and move ahead.
Whoa—he was getting way ahead of himself. He wasn’t certain he was cut out for marriage. The first thing he’d have to change would be his job. He couldn’t marry and expect a wife to live alone for two years at a time while he went off to build a bridge.
He’d never thought about settling down, making a family, buying a home.
Yet, why not? He’d wanted permanence when he’d been a child. He could make his own permanent arrangement. Buy a house with lots of yard space. Get a dog. Have cookouts in the backyard. Get to know his neighbors. Put down roots.
Anna said she loved New York, but would she also be open to the idea of living in a house with a yard? It was something he’d yearned for when younger. If he stayed in the States, he could afford to buy the perfect house—suitable for a child and pets.
Anna watched as Myles’s gaze roamed around her living room. She glanced around, trying to see it through his eyes. It reflected her personality and idea of home more than her late husband’s. It was a comedown from the apartment she and Tom had shared, but she liked it. Did Myles like it? Or was it too feminine for him? He lived a rugged lifestyle—far different from what she liked.
“Do you miss being back at the job site? Will you go back to the same place?” she asked.
He leaned back against her sofa cushions and looked at her, his eyes narrowed in thought. “I miss it. It’s great work. I enjoy being part of the construction team, bringing modern conveniences to a desperate place. But I think I’m ready for a change. I want to set down roots and find a niche that will bring me as much satisfaction. Maybe not right away, but I no longer see myself as a nomad for the rest of my days.”
“And you once thought you would be all your life?” she asked.
He shrugged. “It’s what I know. I had four foster homes growing up. By the time I was in high school, I knew not to become attached—there was always the possibility of being yanked to yet another one. This kind of life followed suit. The upside is the travel to countries I’d never have visited if I weren’t doing this kind of work.”
“So what changed?”
“Almost getting killed. Life is suddenly more precious than I expected. Things can change in a heartbeat. You and your husband had hopes for the future, he died. I don’t plan to live in fear for the rest of my life, but I don’t plan to take it for granted, either.”
She nodded, surprised to realize the crushing ache she used to feel when reminded of Tom’s untimely death didn’t threaten her tonight. She studied Myles for a moment. He looked tired, but virile and intriguing. She rarely related to people as easily as she had with him. Or invite them into her home.
It seemed right with Myles. Was it because he was recuperating from serious injuries and she felt compassion for all he’d been through?
No, she didn’t feel sorry for the man. The truth was, he fascinated her. He lived abroad and worked at a job most men never even dreamed about. He’d faced danger and survived.
On a purely physical level, he attracted her. His eyes were dreamy. His lips drew her attention again and again. Despite the recovery mode he was in, he was muscular and strong and made her feel special.
She blinked and looked away, seeking a picture of Tom. For once the connection she normally felt was missing. It was merely a colored photograph of a man she’d once known, loved and now mourned. Tom was gone.
Anna wasn’t dead. And while they’d never discussed what the other should do if one died young, she knew Tom would have wanted her to explore all facets of life. To move on and find happiness elsewhere if she could. He’d loved life, loved her, and loved Zack. He’d want the very best for them even if he couldn’t provide it.
Did that mean getting to know someone else? Someone so different? Someone who made her feel like she was on the edge of something wonderful and thrilling—yet scary.
She wasn’t ready for that. She’d had a great marriage with Tom. It’d be highly unlikely she’d find another man who could give her the same thing.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
She looked at him. “Yes, why?”
“Your expression looked almost scared.”
“Sorry, I was thinking of something else.” She glanced almost apologetically at Tom’s picture, then smiled at Myles. “Have a cookie, or aren’t macaroons ones you like?”
“I like them. I’m still full of pizza. That was fun tonight. I think Zack preferred the toys to the food, though.”
“Yes, he loves to explore new things.”
Myles reached out to place his cup on the coffee table and, in doing so, knocked off an opened letter. He reached for it, glancing at it briefly.
“What’s this?” he asked, putting it back on the table. “Zack’s school needs repairs?”
“It’s an old building, as is everything around this neighborhood. Last winter, a severe storm found a weak spot on the roof and it leaked like crazy. The building inspectors came to check for mold. In doing the inspection, they found other items not up to the current code. And the playground equipment is antiquated. That letter is a call to parents for help.”
“So what are you going to do?” he asked.
“I don’t know yet. I’m not very handy. I don’t think I’ve done more than hammer a nail into the wall to hang pictures. I painted the kitchen. Guess I’ll do what they assign me and hope for the best.”
“Need more help?”
“You?”
“I’m at a loose end and going crazy with inactivity. I’m not ready to return to work full time. I need a doctor’s release for the company first. But I could manage a bit of repair work.”
“I can’t ask you to do that.”
“You’re not asking, I’m volunteering.”
She studied him for a moment.
“I think that’d be amazing. I doubt any of the parents have the building knowledge and experience you have. But it’s strictly volunteer.”
Myles smiled.
“I know that, Anna. I’d be happy to help.”
“Wow. Great. I’ll let them know Tuesday when Zack goes again. There’s a planning meeting on Wednesday evening and the projects begin on Saturday. Are you sure?”
Myles nodded.
“Thank you. Do you remember where the preschool is?”
“Just a few blocks from here.”
“Yes. I was going to walk over after dinner on Wednesday. If you want to come here for dinner first, we can go together.”
“Sounds like a plan. Will Zack be coming?”
“No, Edith is going to watch him. I really appreciate this, Myles. It’ll really help the school.”
“No problem. As I said, I could use the activity.” He rose. “I think I should head out. It’s getting late.”
Anna nodded and put down her cup. Standing, she led the way to the door.
“Thanks again for taking us to dinner. I know Zack loved it.”
“Thanks for going with me,” he said.
He leaned over and brushed his lips against hers.
Anna caught her breath. For a moment Myles’s eyes met hers, then he leaned in again, reaching for her this time, pulling her into his embrace. When his lips met hers, she closed her eyes and kissed him back.
She didn’t know Myles well, but the attraction she’d been fighting surged to the front. His mouth moved against hers, his arms held her securely. She leaned in, wanting more. Thrilled at the sensations that swept through her, she opened her lips to return his kiss. When he deepened the embrace, she felt herself spinning through space, tingling with desire.
Before she could think coherently, he pulled back a little and then brushed her damp lips with his thumb. Looking into his dark eyes, she could see wonder, desire and something else in them. She had a million questions, felt a dozen different emotions. But knew she wanted more from this man. He ignited her senses, filled her with a delight she hadn’t experienced in a long time.
“I really enjoyed tonight,” she said.
She wanted to say more, but felt suddenly uncertain. Was he kissing her because He hadn’t been with a woman in a long time?
She couldn’t bear it if that were the case. Anna hoped he’d meant more by it. She wanted to know more about Myles. Was she being susceptible to the first man she’d been attracted to since Tom’s death, or was there truly something special about Myles himself?
He dropped his hands and stepped to the door. Opening it, he turned and looked at her. Anna felt her heart skip a beat at the look in those dark eyes.
“Want to go on a picnic with me to Central Park tomorrow?”
“Zack?”
“Of course. Always included,” he said.
“We’d love to.” How had she lucked out in finding a man who would include her son whenever he saw her?