Chapter Nineteen

Riley O’Neal tossed down his pen from the doodle on the notepad, stunned that he’d spelled out CHIP O’NEAL in block letters.

“Hello? Riley? Are you still there?” Through the phone, Sean Malone’s question brought Riley back to his immediate task.

“Sorry, Sean. Got lost in thought for a moment.” He returned his attention to the conversation instead of a certain pair of gray eyes. “I’ll make sure Allison has all the details for the new office and, when you’re ready, we’ll set it up.” He relaxed a little, knowing he’d kept a promise to his father without sacrificing what he loved most—fieldwork. “I don’t know how to thank you for helping us out like this. Welcome back to the Northstar family.”

Sean Malone, a former CIA agent and partner of Byron’s, had agreed to come out of retirement and manage the new satellite location. Eight months ago, the firm’s plan to set up an operation in the western region of the United States had been postponed. Byron had chosen to wait on the expansion, until now. Riley tore off the page with the doodle and scribbled notes on a new page to give to Allison for review. “When can you be in town to go over the contracts?”

“Sometime next week,” Sean said. “I have a doctor’s appointment to clear me for travel at the end of this week. After that, I’ll book my flight.”

Riley nodded. “Great. We’ll finalize things then. Bring Caitlin with you. It’ll be good to see her again. I’m glad she’s agreed to come on board, too.”

“She’s thrilled to work for Northstar once more, and I’m glad her assignments will be closer to home,” Sean replied.

Riley ended the call and leaned back in his chair with a measure of satisfaction at completing the transaction with Sean. Northstar was expanding. The firm would have the ability to serve those in need, regardless of their location, and do it quickly.

Now he could concentrate on the next project.

Except he couldn’t concentrate. His thoughts kept returning to the last assignment. He still felt as though he’d betrayed Chip after he’d promised to come back and see her in the hospital. He’d intended to keep that promise until his father sent him off to finish the job. Then instead of being happy to see her when she’d shown up at the bust in New Mexico, he’d let his anger—and something a little more unsettling—get in the way, and walked away from her. True, he’d had other duties to attend to, but he could’ve made time to seek her out…if he could trust these strange feelings.

His preoccupation with Chip was keeping him from moving forward. He recognized this obsession was much like the one he’d gone through when searching for the runaway Mary last year. Only this time it was more than an obsession.

Getting involved with Chip after the assignment began was one thing, but not doing thorough background checks on all the parties before taking off to New Mexico was inexcusable. Riley was appalled when they’d discovered Lorraine Voras had been involved in the kidnapping. If he’d allowed Chip to pressure Lorraine as she’d wanted to after that rescue, they’d have known the woman’s story was suspect.

After wrapping up Dean Weston’s interrogation in New Mexico, he’d returned to Washington and presented the evidence to the FBI. He was there when they formally charged Lorraine for accessory to kidnapping Fiona Burnsworth and blackmailing the senator.

Riley had also been the one to break the news to Senator Pomeroy of his aide’s misuse of public office. It was unfortunate timing for Pomeroy. But with the sale of the UAS program to Mexico, and the scandal breaking out in the legitimate news agencies, Pomeroy decided to announce an early retirement and resign.

Lastly, Northstar had received word through back channels that one of the more prominent cartels was unhappy about El Rey del Sur’s direct assault against a U.S. Senator. A hit was put out on the head of the upstart cartel for poking the global powerhouse. Since no one knew who the leader was, the authorities couldn’t be sure the gruesome photograph of a headless body sent to Burnsworth’s e-mail was the leader of the cartel, but no one was placing any bets against it, either.

Even though the case was ultimately a success, Riley couldn’t forgive his oversight. He shouldn’t have permitted the feisty lieutenant to distract him. His lapse in judgment resulted in the trap he and Chip stumbled into. A trap that almost cost Chip her life.

He’d vowed he’d never let anything hurt her again. If that meant staying away from her for the rest of his life—that’s what he’d do. Not seeing her again was painful, but not as painful as realizing his mistake could have killed her.

He reached up and loosened his tie. As he did, his fingers brushed against a chain around his neck. For one moment, he indulged himself and pulled on the chain until it came free. A small gold ring dangled next to his larger one. He’d retrieved Chip’s ring from one of the prisoners after their arrests. As he fingered the smooth metal, he recalled the flutter of her hand when he’d slid the band over her finger. He hadn’t realized it then, but in that moment, she’d changed his life.

No, that wasn’t quite true. The girl he had known as Mary triggered a change long before they met again in the conference room. Her spitfire courage showed him that sacrifices were made all the time. His profession wasn’t a game of playing James Bond, like in the movies, but was real involvement, with real people—a chance to touch lives and make things better.

It had taken almost losing her for Riley to see that reality. He hoped someday she would forgive him for putting her life in danger. He hoped she could forgive him for following the orders of his assignment and walking away from her. As an army officer, she understood duty. Maybe better than he did. Surely, she would understand his choices.

He slid the rings and chain back under his collar. Those memories were best tucked away. The director was waiting to review the final case report. Maybe once the paperwork was filed, Riley could put everything about this assignment behind him and move on.

He nodded briefly to Allison as he passed her on his way to his father’s office. She smiled and pushed the black horn-rimmed glasses up on her nose. Riley wouldn’t have found Chip in time if it hadn’t been for Allison’s quick responses. He had already asked Byron to give the lab tech a bonus for her work on this assignment.

The walk to the director’s office was over before he was ready. Riley hesitated before knocking on the closed door. It wasn’t often his father’s office door was closed. Perhaps he didn’t wish to be disturbed. No, his father had asked to see the report and Riley was delaying the inevitable. He was the one who wasn’t ready to let go of the assignment.

He took a deep breath and tapped lightly on the door. Hearing the muffled “come in”, he turned the handle and opened the door. Riley stopped short of entering the room when he saw Chip sitting in his father’s office.

She wore her Class A uniform, but her cap was gone and her braid hung over her shoulder in disarray. His mouth went dry. He wasn’t prepared to face her. He didn’t think he’d ever be prepared to face her.

She looked at him with expectant eyes as he stood in the doorway.

She was so exquisite in her own way. His chest hurt at the sight of her. He wanted to rush to her and kiss her soft mouth, drink from her lips until he was numb with intoxication.

“Come in, son.” Byron gestured with his hand. “You’re gawking.”

Chip smiled at Byron’s comment, but her gaze never left Riley’s face.

His legs grew stiff and it took an effort to walk into the room. From the corner of his eye, he saw his father stand and walk toward him. Somewhere through the fog filling his brain, he felt a pat on his back and heard the office door close behind him.

Seeing Chip was sheer torture and it took a moment to find his voice. “Why are you here?”

“Because you wouldn’t come to me.”

Riley stepped closer, her eyes drawing him into their depths. “I had no reason to. The case is finished.”

“You left without any explanation. After all we’ve been through together.”

His head jerked, her words like a slap. “I left to complete the reports for the assignment.”

“Looks like they’re finished.” She nodded at the folder in his hand. “What about now?”

The assignment was over. She’d filed her report with the firm a week ago. Riley had spent hours poring over her description of the kidnapping and what those cartel goons had done to her and Fiona. With each turn of the page, he had become more enraged at what she had gone through. He was furious, with the suspects and their actions, and with himself. His neglect had almost killed Chip and Fiona. Most of all he was angry because of his failure to protect her.

“I made too many mistakes on this assignment,” he said harshly. “You and Fiona could have died. There is no excuse for that.”

****

Chip cringed at the self-recrimination in his voice. She carried some of the responsibility, too, and balked at the thought of Riley taking the blame for everything that went wrong. If she had been honest with him from the very beginning last year—revealed her true identity—then maybe things would have been less strained between them from the start of the mission.

She stepped forward and looked him squarely in the eyes. “Perhaps if I ask for your forgiveness?”

His eyebrows rose. “For what?”

“I should have told you who I was when we met at the gang house.”

His shoulders stiffened. “How would that have made any difference in this assignment?”

“I wouldn’t have been embarrassed by my omission and maybe I would have paid better attention myself.”

He shook his head. “You were kidnapped because of my negligence.”

“No, I wasn’t.” Chip stated firmly. “I was a target, like Fiona. We may have fallen into their trap, but it was a crime of opportunity and who I was that made the difference.”

When he didn’t reply, she ventured another step toward him. Couldn’t he see that he wasn’t at fault? Couldn’t he see that she had come to him? She didn’t want him responsible for her protection.

Riley finally spoke, but his tone was filled with denial. “I can’t do this.”

“Why not?” She was afraid now. Afraid he didn’t love her as she thought. What if she had given away her heart only to have it trampled after all?

“I can’t protect you!”

“I’m not asking you to.” Her voice softened. “I don’t expect you to.”

“You don’t need me. You don’t need anyone.” There was agony in his voice.

“I may not need someone to protect me, but I need you. All I am asking is for you to love me as I love you.” There, she’d said it. Everything she had to give was on the line. She wanted him to know they could make it work. That she loved him. That they could be together.

Riley closed his eyes for a moment and then opened them to stare at her. Slowly he moved closer until he was in reach. She was ready to fall into his arms if only he’d open up. But he didn’t. He hesitated.

He nodded toward the silver bars on her shoulders. “What about the Army? You’ll have to go if you’re called.”

“I might, but I’m resigning my commission. I’ll be listed with the inactive reserves and they’d have to call me back to active duty, first.”

“What will you do?”

His question gave her hope that they could find a way out of this impasse. “This assignment showed me how important it is to be where I can do the most good. For me, it’s with the kids, helping them beat the odds.”

He still hesitated, an unreadable expression on his face. She’d laid everything on the line, her plans, her future… Her heart. All of it was there for his taking. And he still hesitated. Swallowing her disappointment and hurt, she took a step backward, out of his reach.

“I’m sorry.” How had she got it so wrong? “I thought you felt…” She didn’t know what she thought. That he loved her, too? That he cared? How could she have let herself believe they could have something together? Her father was wrong—Riley wasn’t afraid for her, he was afraid of her. She’d found a chink in his armor and it scared him. She had scared him and he was shutting her out of his life.

She waited a moment longer, but he still didn’t respond. What was she waiting for? A miracle? She turned away from him and headed toward the office door.

“Chip, wait.” The desperation in his voice stopped her.

She turned to look at him. Was that hope she saw in his eyes?

With a confidence she didn’t really feel, she walked toward him. He stood so still as she drew near. Stretching up on her toes, she placed her lips against his.

The mere touch of her mouth was all it took to shatter the stalemate. He grabbed her by the shoulders and crushed her against him.

Chip’s hands slid up his chest for support as she surrendered to his kiss and was lost. If he stopped now and pushed her away, she would suffer more damage from the shrapnel of her shattered heart than she would be willing to repair. In that moment, she became his, even if he didn’t want her.

He released her shoulders and gathered her in a tight embrace. Chip responded by wrapping her arms around his neck, running her fingers through his thick hair. She gave him everything. The kiss deepened, and all doubts about giving her heart fled as she took what he offered.

****

The feelings pulsing through Riley both frightened and exhilarated him. He felt empowered by her response, encouraged as the kiss continued. When she opened her mouth to allow entry, every defense he’d built crumbled. He had never been this vulnerable in his entire life. She held him in the palm of her hand. And he loved her. She was part of his very essence. He didn’t simply want her. His heart wouldn’t survive without her. The raw honesty of her love encompassed him as he surrendered to his militant spitfire.

Reluctantly, he pulled away from the sweet taste of her lips. He looked into her eyes shining with passion and desire. His body tightened with the knowledge that the look was for him. Finding his voice, he asked in deep, promising tones, “Maybe we could see where this leads?”

He was rewarded by the vision of sunlight breaking through turbulent thunderclouds. It would take him a lifetime to get used to the way her eyes changed, like the wind across the sky. It would take their lifetimes.

“Say the words, Riley O’Neal. Please, let me hear them.”

“I love you, Lieutenant Chip Mary Anderson.” His voice was thick with emotion. “I don’t know what the future holds for us, but I want to find out. Are you willing?”

“I am.” Her promise was a symphony to his ears.

Riley released her and reached inside his shirt. He took the thin silver chain from around his neck and unclasped the ends. He reached behind her neck and fastened the chain again. The gold rings slid down the linked rope and rested atop her uniform. Her ring, and his, the eternal symbols of love and promise.

“You found my ring.” Her fingers trembled as she touched it.

“With this ring, I found you.” He voiced the words from his heart. With both her hands firmly in his, he lowered his head and sealed the vow with a kiss.