The Simpsons was on. It was a funny episode – the one in which Grampa Simpson turns out to have been a professional wrestler – but after all the excitement involved in having and clearing up tea in the way Alfie had just done, just sitting there and watching TV felt a little … well, for want of a better word … routine.

“So,” said Mrs Stokes, “are you doing just what you like?”

“Well, yes …” said Alfie. “But now it feels like I want more.”

“Ah,” said the old lady. “That’s what happens, you see, Alfie, when we get just what we like. Appetite grows. It spirals. The more you’re allowed to do exactly what you want, the more you need – to satisfy the need inside.”

“Oh, I see,” said Alfie, nodding. “So … this whole experience is, like, teaching me that? About always wanting more and more stuff? Will the next magic thing that happens get out of control and I’ll nearly die, but at least I’ll have learnt an important life lesson?”

“Nah,” said Mrs Stokes.

“Oh, OK,” said Alfie. “In that case, I’d like to go into the TV.”

And the next thing he knew he was. A yellow, three-fingered version of himself was at the side of the wrestling ring, shouting at Grampa Simpson. Then the channel changed – because Alfie wanted it to, and also because Mrs Stokes had provided him with a remote control to take into the TV. Alfie was now on Cartoon Network in an episode of his favourite show, The Amazing World of Gumball. He was a kind of half-frog, half-apple jumping around at Elmore Junior High School.

Unlike The Simpsons, this wasn’t an episode that had actually been on TV; it just followed a story that Alfie made up as he went along, where Gumball and Darwin were in competition to be his best friend (it ended up with them fighting each other with jelly-and-custard guns and Alfie deciding it was a draw).

Then Alfie pressed another button on his remote control. Some very dramatic music started playing and he found himself in a dark suit and tie, reading the seven o’clock news.

Oh dear, he thought, wrong button, as a man poked his head round from behind a camera, looking very, very confused. Still, might as well make the most of it.

“Good evening,” said Alfie, “this is the seven o’clock news. All children between the ages of seven and twelve are allowed not to go to school tomorrow. Broccoli Bake has been outlawed. And Freddie Barnes, of 14 Brackenbury Road, is from this moment on to be officially known as Freddie ‘Bum-Bum’ Barnes. Goodnight!”

And the dramatic theme music started again.