CHAPTER 41
Was Izzy insane? No way in hell was she about to be the next Tooth Fairy. Not if I could help it. It was too dangerous. Jack the Tooth Ripper already had it in for her. Waving her new status as Tooth Fairy was like wagging a rosebush at Ferdinand.
And how did the fairies even know Henrick was dead and therefore no longer fulfilling his duties as the Tooth Fairy? I thought about the bug planted in my phone and winced.
“As my first act as Tooth Fairy . . .” Izzy was saying as I charged inside the room, bursting through the crowd of well-wishers surrounding her. I realized my mistake immediately, mostly due to the army of tiny ninja fairies armed with teeth.
“It’s him. The blue-haired one,” a fairy on my right screamed, flapping his red-tipped wings like a mad fairy. “Get him!”
Hundreds of tiny fingers dug into my arms and legs, dragging me down to the floor. I fought the winged assault, zapping a few of my attackers like mosquitoes, but to no avail. I now knew how that poor Gulliver had felt.
Small feet kicked me in various places. While their tiny kicks and punches didn’t hurt exactly, this wasn’t an experience I planned on repeating anytime soon.
“Stop,” Izzy screamed from somewhere to my left. “Please, stop it. You’re going to hurt him.” I winced; her direct blow to my manhood hurt much more than a hundred tiny punches. When the little winged devils ignored her, her voice rose to a near squeak. “I command you to leave him alone. Now!”
Just as quickly as the attack started it stopped, leaving me lying on the ground full of small red welts. Izzy ran to me and knelt down, her hands hovering above me. “Are you all right?”
One of the fairy army commanders, his camouflage-patterned wings flapping, grabbed her arm, pulling her away from me. “Stay back, Your Highness. The blue-haired one is dangerous. You’ve heard the prophecy.”
“You’re wrong. Blue wouldn’t harm us,” she said. Unfortunately, her words came at the very same moment I fried the two fairies holding my arms. The buzz and pop of electricity filled the air, and with it came the stench of burned feathers.
Izzy sucked in a breath. “Damn it, Blue. You’re not helping.”
Four more fairies piled on top of me as sparks shot from my body like a volcano. Izzy pushed the commander away, tossing her weight into the fray as she ripped away wing after wing until I was free. “Are you okay?” she asked again, careful to avoid contact with any of my electrical parts.
I sat up, brushing off my arms and jeans. “I’m fine. Great, in fact. Why, I feel like dancing.”
She snorted. “No need to be sarcastic.”
“Oh, you haven’t heard anything yet, Isabella.” My tone conveyed just what I thought about her new role in fairy politics. “What the hell were you thinking?” I grabbed her arm, harder than necessary, but fear strengthened my grip.
Red fingerprints welled on her pale skin as blue sparks sheared her flesh. I dropped her arm when she let out a small cry. I started to apologize, but it was too late.
The damage was done.
A long golden wand smacked my knuckles. I yelped, turning to strangle the fairy who’d struck me. The wand-carrying fairy jumped back. “You must never touch the Tooth Fairy. It isn’t done.”
I ignored the bossy fairy to focus on the boss fairy, the one in pink wings. Didn’t she realize the danger she was in? Someone was ganking Tooth Fairies, and now she’d officially made herself target number one. “Jesus, Izzy, do you have any idea . . . ?”
She pressed her finger to my lips, receiving a small jolt. “This is not the place. Please. Just trust me a little longer.”
I laughed, pushing her hand away. Trust her? Not bloody likely. I trusted no one. It made life so much easier. Blue Reynolds, PI of One.
Nevertheless, I would stay quiet for now, mostly to avoid another round of fairy wrestling. The little guys had called in reinforcements. Now at least forty fairies surrounded me, each armed with toothed weaponry.
I straightened to my full height. The winged crowd took a collective step back, as if I was diseased. I raised an eyebrow. Izzy gave me a tight smile. “They don’t like strangers.”
“Liar.” I sent an arc of electricity from one hand to the other. The crowd backed up again, a murmur of fear rising among them. If I weren’t careful there would be a full-on tiny winged riot. I grinned at the thought.
“Fine, they don’t like you.” She lowered her voice. “So I suggest, if you want to leave here anytime soon without electrocuting thousands of fairies, you follow my lead.”
“Your wish is my command, Your Toothiness.” I bowed low to emphasize my point. Rather than appreciate the salutation she kicked me in the shin. Lucky for her, she was wearing rubber-soled boots. Not so lucky for me, though. “Ow!” I jumped on one foot until the sting of her kick eased. “What was that for?”
A genuine smile crossed her face. “I felt like it.”
Seemed like as good a reason as any, I supposed. Izzy motioned me forward, and together we pushed through the crowd of annoyed and possibly deranged fairies, only electrocuting a handful in the process.
One fairy, his wings the color of emeralds in the sunlight, stopped us before we slipped through the door. His eyes blazed and his mouth formed a thin line.
I remembered him from my first foray into Fairy Central. He was the green-winged fairy who’d convinced Deafy the Dwarf to let me go. I kind of owed the guy, so I refrained from zapping him. Just yet.
“Out of the way, Jonas,” Izzy ordered when he stayed planted in our path.
He stood there for a moment, his gaze boring into hers. Then he took a small step to the side. “You know who and what he is, Isabella,” he said in a surprisingly high-pitched falsetto. “Do not make the mistakes of your father.”
Izzy’s face twisted with anger, but when she spoke her voice was barely above a whisper. “Do not speak of my father. You know nothing about him.”
Jonas laughed, but it was devoid of humor. “The same can be said of your friend.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Is there a problem?”
“Please excuse Jonas, Blue. He’s got a bit of a Napoleonic complex, that’s all.” With that shot, she shoved past him, leaving me to follow in her wake. I did so, but at a sedate pace, sizing up every fairy I passed.
I turned around in time to see Jonas make a hanging motion with his hands. I gave him a wide bring-it-on smile. Probably not the smartest of moves, but I wasn’t in the mood to be bullied by these winged vermin anymore.