“You did what you knew how to do, and when you knew better, you did better.” 

- Maya Angelou

What have I learned in writing this book about failure

I don’t personally know any really successful people at least in terms of wealth or fame. I have read a lot of self-help books and biographies, but lacking a real role model I sought to challenge my assumptions and dig deep into my life.  When I started to write a book about failure and the concept of failure analysis in relationship to finding success, what I have learned is that it all comes down to what you can learn from your failures the choices you make to become accountable for your life.  It is really your choice to find satisfaction in the culmination of your failures and successes. You can also choose to reject the status quo and seek to do more. 

In addition to this book I took a holistic view of my life in the context of failure and conduced an experiment to see if I could really change my life. 

After a few months of writing I intuitively started to define a strategy or system.  Here is how I defined that system knowing what I know now - after almost 11 months of success and failure analysis:

My system:

1.     Took an inventory of my life and began a journey of self-discovery and knowledge to unlock why I feel like a failure in my career and to some extent in my life. I used some analysis skills that I learned through many years of instructional and product design.

2.     I then started a pattern of reading, thinking and writing that served the purposes of this book, but more importantly it helped me think through things.

3.     As I discovered where my failures had occurred I took steps to learn new skills or behaviors and then apply those in real life situations.

4.     With the addition of a few pounds over the holidays I took up a low carb diet to help me feel better.

5.     As I began the diet, I became more active (these are systems within systems) and this helped to get my energy up to work on this book and on other parts of my life.

6.     As I stand on the precipice of new possibilities I know that I have choices.  I also know that I can chose to pay the price that must be paid.  I also know that I’m capable of learning what I need to learn so that I can change and to adapt to whatever occurs next.

In order to consolidate this system into something that I could remember and understand I came up with this acronym: ACE

·           A nalysis of my failures

·           C reated a system for corrective action as I learned from this analysis

·           E valuated outcomes and try again

What I think I did was ACE my failures!  This is not a singular event, but a process or a system. I have seen tangible evidence that I can learn from my failures. An unintended consequence in writing this book occurred as my perception of my life improved.  I felt better about myself and what I’m trying to do both in my career and in my family/personal life. 

What I learned is that success for me is learning how to create and maintain a system or strategy that gives me the maximum exposure to opportunity. You control what you can control by learning from your failures and working toward your aspirations. 

For example, through analyses I hypothesized that the main problem I have at work is human interaction and my attitude.   Not a new problem, but one I have rationalize away for many years.  I learned skills to help me and as I learned these skills I became accountable for the outcomes.  I made a plan. And the fruits of that plan are now yielding positive results.   

As I approach the end of almost a year of thinking and writing about this topic I’m asking myself critical questions:

So what is the book really about? What am I really trying to say?

Here it is:

This book represents my attempt to try again, and try it differently. We all want to feel okay about failing.  We all want to succeed, but winning all the time doesn’t happen. We all know this.  We lose a lot.  I want to be able to embrace failure and also those things in my life that I can’t control. I do want to succeed.  I think you as the reader want to as well.

I believe that when you fail you need to understand why.  You need to learn something from every major event in your life, including failure.  After that exploration you can work on how to change your life and what you need to do to make those changes. 

Life experiences should offer things we can learn from. If you don’t look or ask why you fail then you will never overcome failure and in turn you will not be successful.   If you are not learning, then you are not seeking. If you are not seeking then you are not moving forward.  It is unlikely that you will be happy if you think you know it all or there is nothing left to learn.