CHAPTER THREE

STEPPING THROUGH THE automatic doors that linked Seattle General’s ER to the rest of the hospital, Emilia found herself catching her breath.

How could everything look the same when nothing felt the same?

She could see the doors to the ambulance bay opening and a patient being brought in on a stretcher to where the triage nurse was waiting for them. The central desk had doctors and interns checking results like X-rays and blood tests that were coming through on one of the many computer screens available or standing beside the glass wall where patient locations and conditions were kept up to date, along with which doctor was assigned to the case. Curtains were being opened or whisked shut as medical staff, technicians or even cleaners or security came and went from the cubicles and the folding doors to Resus One were open, just as they had been when Emilia answered the trauma team code only yesterday.

But it felt very different. The head of this ER was not the person she’d thought he was. Instead, he was something so extraordinary it was still almost impossible to wrap her head around it. A crown prince. Royalty. With a background of such privilege that the gulf between them couldn’t be any bigger. And that was why it felt so different. Emilia didn’t know what to say to Dom any more. She felt awkward. Out of place. Different. The feeling was uncomfortably reminiscent of how she’d felt at every new school she’d had to go to or worse, with every new family who’d decided to take on the challenge of fostering her.

Dom was even in almost the same place she’d seen him yesterday morning but it looked as though he was merely scanning the area to make sure it was ready for use when needed. The incoming patient, a teenaged boy in a school uniform who was grinning at something the paramedic was telling him, certainly didn’t look as if he was in need of critical care. Emilia didn’t need to go near the resus area, either. She wasn’t actually required in the ER at all at the moment but she was here and seeing Dom standing alone and not currently caught up in some emergency was exactly what she’d hoped to find.

Because she needed to apologise.

She needed, somehow, to try and make things more like they’d been the day before yesterday. So that she could feel just as excited by the challenge of answering a trauma team call and come into this ER without feeling like her stomach was tied up in knots. She’d been unprofessional yesterday, storming off like the petulant teenager she’d once been and she didn’t want that to affect her ability to work with Dom. Was it possible that they could somehow get past this and go back to that easy camaraderie that allowed for a bit of banter?

Swallowing hard as she got close to Resus One, Emilia decided to see if she could take a short cut straight back.

‘Hey...’ She lowered her voice to a whisper as she half smiled to let Dom know she was teasing him. ‘Sorry, but my curtsey’s a bit rusty.’

Oh...help... That had gone down like a lead balloon, hadn’t it? Dom’s smile was more like a grimace. Then he raised an eyebrow, glancing over Emilia’s shoulder to where a technician was coming past, pushing an ECG trolley.

‘My office?’ His tone was neutral. ‘If you’ve got a moment to spare, that is.’ He didn’t wait for her response, but turned on his heel and walked off. Emilia followed. This wasn’t reminding her so much of a first day at school, any more. It was more like being sent to the headmaster’s office to explain yet another instance of her bad behaviour.

But Dom didn’t look angry as he shut the office door behind her. He looked as if he hadn’t slept all night. Or maybe he hadn’t even gone to bed. There were deep creases around his eyes and he might have combed his hair with his fingers judging by its tousled look. And then he sighed and the sound cut through Emilia more than a raised voice might have.

‘This is exactly why I didn’t tell you,’ he said quietly. ‘Why I didn’t tell anyone. It changes things. It makes it impossible to know whether a relationship is even genuine.’

Yep...he was rubbing his forehead as he spoke and then he ran his fingers through his hair making it even more rumpled. But Emilia only noticed that in her peripheral vision because she was caught by his eyes as he spoke again.

‘And what we had—what we have, I should say—that’s genuine, isn’t it?’

Emilia felt the need to catch her breath again, the way she had when she’d been coming into the ER, but this time, it didn’t work. Her breath had already been caught in her chest.

Dom gave his head a tiny shake. ‘It’s strange because we don’t really know that much about each other but I’ve always thought that you know me better than anyone. Because we’re the same, you and me.’

Her breath wasn’t caught any more. It escaped through pursed lips in a dismissive huff. ‘Yeah...right...’ she muttered.

But Dom ignored her. ‘In here, we are,’ he said softly. He touched the left side of his chest, over his heart, with the same gesture he’d used yesterday when he’d been telling her so passionately that he’d wanted a chance to be the person he truly was.

‘We both had the same dream and we were both driven to be the best. We both give everything we’ve got—and more—to our careers. To the people who put their trust and their lives into our hands.’

Emilia had to swallow the lump in her throat. It was true. That was the connection. But something else had grown from them becoming such rivals to be the best. Genuine respect. And, while they’d kept their distance personally, there was a familiarity, if not a kind of fondness, even, in the banter they’d always enjoyed. Was that why she’d found herself almost crying, yesterday? Because she’d thought she’d lost that for ever?

‘Maybe I didn’t explain things very well yesterday,’ Dom continued. ‘I didn’t mean to upset you. I’d like a chance to explain better.’

Emilia shook her head. ‘There’s no need. I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did. That’s what I came here for...to apologise.’

‘There’s no need for that, either, but I’d still like to talk. I want to try and put things right between us and...’

Emilia watched him take a slow breath as he hesitated. This was what she wanted, too, wasn’t it? To put things right? Maybe it was going to be possible to push the rewind button, at least enough to let them work together without distraction. Except that Dom seemed to have something he was reluctant to say.

‘And...?’ she prompted.

‘I’d like to know you better,’ he said. ‘I didn’t sleep much last night. I was worried about my father. And my sister.’

‘Of course you were. I was happy with Roberto’s condition as far as his orthopaedic status is when I saw him earlier today but the brain surgery has to be a concern. Are they going to try waking him up soon?’

‘They’ve already lightened the sedation but he’s not showing any signs of waking up. It may take some time.’

‘At least he’s in the best possible place. And your sister?’

‘She tells me she’s fine. She’s not in the hospital any longer and she’s apparently trying to keep a low profile. She wouldn’t even tell me where she is. Anyway...’ Dom rubbed his forehead again. ‘It wasn’t just family worries that kept me awake all night. I was thinking about you, as well.’

That startled her. Not that she was about to confess she’d spent quite some time thinking about him, mind you.

‘About what you meant when you said I had no idea what “family issues” really are.’ Dom caught and held her gaze. ‘I want to know what happened to you and why you hate secrets so much. I just...’ His breath came out in another sigh. ‘I guess I just don’t want to lose what we have, Emmy. Something that’s real. Something I can trust.’

‘But...how can I trust you...?’

‘You know my secret now.’ Dom gaze shifted to the closed door of his office and then back to Emilia. ‘You and Lucas are the only people here that know. Even everybody involved in Roberto’s scheduled visit and surgery have no idea of my connection to the family. I’m trusting you...’

He was. And, oddly, it made Emilia want to cry again and she never cried. She’d decided long ago that she had used up a lifetime supply of tears as a child.

An alarm was sounding beyond the office door and Dom’s head swerved, his conversation with Emilia shut down as swiftly as if a switch had been flicked.

‘That’s the cardiac arrest code...’ He was already opening the door and, a moment later, Emilia could hear him issuing terse instructions to get the patient into Resus One. As she walked past the closed doors seconds later, he was calmly asking for someone to charge the defibrillator to two hundred joules. Stat...

The cardiac arrest victim who’d been rushed into resus looked barely more than a child.

‘How old is he?’ Dom was watching the screen of the monitor as he held a bag mask over the boy’s face to deliver a breath of oxygen. It was still showing a heart rhythm that would have been rapidly fatal if this arrest hadn’t happened somewhere with people trained to support circulation by doing CPR while they used shocks and drugs to try and get a normal rhythm established again.

‘Fourteen.’ An intern was doing the first two minutes of chest compressions.

‘History?’

‘He got brought in by ambulance after fainting at school.’ It was another ER doctor who answered Dom’s query, as she was working to establish an IV line in the patient’s arm. ‘The paramedic said that the school wasn’t aware of any health problems. His mother’s been contacted and she’s on her way.’

A fainting episode could well have been a warning sign of the sudden cardiac arrest that had occurred later but Dom didn’t have the head space to be considering what might have caused this life-threatening situation. That would come later, when they’d got this boy back.

‘I’ll have the airway trolley, please. I’m going to intubate.’ A flash of thought came and went as Dom realised that Lucas wasn’t here to manage the airway component of this resuscitation but that was something else that couldn’t be allowed head space yet. ‘Draw up some adrenaline, thanks. And amiodarone. Charge the defib again. I’ll intubate in the next cycle of compressions.’ He gave another two breaths with the bag mask as the defibrillator was charging.

‘Okay...stand clear... Shocking now...’

The battle was on and it was one that Dom was absolutely determined to win. He had all the weapons that could be to his advantage—the ability to deliver electrical shocks, access to blood vessels and drugs that could stimulate the heart or deal with arrhythmias, the means to control an airway and breathing, oxygen, trained staff to perform quality chest compressions to keep blood circulating and the knowledge and skills to use all these weapons to whatever degree was needed.

It was the kind of battle that Dom thrived on. It was absolutely gutting if he lost, of course, but on the other side of the coin was where there was no question that someone’s life had been saved and that had always been at the heart of why he’d dreamed of becoming a doctor. A success was something the whole team would celebrate—and remember—and, this morning, fifteen minutes after Dom had answered the cardiac arrest code, it looked like that was happening.

‘Look...there...we’ve got sinus rhythm.’

The excitement in the intern’s voice made Dom wonder if this might be the first successful resuscitation this young doctor had been a part of. Dom had long ago lost count of how many he’d experienced but, even now, he could share that thrill of seeing the normal spikes tracking across the monitor screen.

‘Airway and ventilation are secure,’ he told the team. ‘I’m going to keep him sedated for now. Let’s get a twelve lead ECG. Has Cardiology been paged for a consult?’

‘They’re on their way. Should arrive soon.’

Someone else arrived first, however. A distraught looking woman who was shown into the resus room, where she rushed towards the trolley.

‘Oh, my God... Jason...’ She reached out to touch his hair but then froze, her gaze fixed on Dom. ‘Is he...is he...?’

‘He’s been very sick,’ Dom told her, ‘but we’ve got him back to a normal heart rhythm.’

‘The school told me he’d just fainted. That there was nothing to worry about but they’d called an ambulance to be on the safe side.’

‘It’s good that they did. He was in the best place possible when his heart stopped.’

Jason’s mother was pale enough to look as though she might be about to faint herself. ‘It stopped? How? Why? Is he going to be okay?’

‘That’s what we need to find out. Has he ever fainted before? Or had seizures?’

‘No...never.’

‘Has he been unwell recently? With a virus, perhaps?’

Again, the woman shook her head. She had her gaze fixed on her son’s still face now, her fingers pressed against her lips as if she was trying to stifle a sob.

‘Is there any chance he’s been exposed to drugs?’

‘No...’ She was shocked but then looked fearful. ‘They can cause heart attacks, can’t they? Some of those pills the kids experiment with these days.’

‘Jason hasn’t had a heart attack,’ Dom explained. ‘He’s had what we call a sudden cardiac arrest. A heart attack is caused by a blockage in a coronary artery and damage to heart muscle. A heart attack can cause SCA but it’s very, very unlikely in Jason’s case. It’s far more likely that it’s been caused by a congenital defect that hasn’t shown up before, or a problem with the electrical signal. The cardiologists will be able to tell you a lot more and they’ll do whatever tests are necessary to find out the cause.’

‘But...but what if it happens again? He...he could die in his sleep or something...’

Tears were escaping now and Jason’s mother was getting more and more upset. This wasn’t the time to start telling her about implantable defibrillators that could prevent it happening again. She needed reassurance right now. And support.

‘Jason’s safe here,’ Dom told her. ‘We’re going to take very good care of him but he won’t wake up for a little while yet. Would you like to come into one of our relatives’ rooms? Can we call family to come and be with you? What about Jason’s dad?’

‘No...’ A handful of tissues was muffling the woman’s words. ‘It’s just me and Jase...’ A nurse had come close and put her arm around the distraught mother’s shoulders. ‘His father hasn’t even seen him since he was a baby and my family...well...there’s kind of issues there, you know?’

Dom was nodding but he was hearing something else. An echo of Emilia’s words.

You have no idea what family issues really are...

The cardiologist team were arriving, Jason was stable and he could see that the boy’s mother was going to get plenty of emotional support from his staff so, after a detailed handover to Cardiology, Dom left the resus area. He had other things he needed to do.

He passed the triage desk first.

‘Kat? Do you know where Lucas Beaufort is?’

‘I heard he’s had to take leave to deal with something personal. A family thing, maybe?’

Dom simply nodded and moved on but he was frowning. Why hadn’t Lucas come to him to arrange the leave? Did it have something to do with his father, perhaps, and he hadn’t wanted to share that with Dom when he was facing a crisis with his own father so critically ill?

Family issues were obviously the theme of the day and the tension that had dissipated to some extent this morning when he’d been told that Roberto’s condition was stable was now ramping up again. He had another family member to worry about as well, didn’t he? Where was Giada and was she really okay?

In the privacy of his office, Dom hit a speed dial number.

‘What’s happening?’ were her first words. ‘Is it Papa?’

‘No. The last information I have is that he’s stable. Still unconscious but his leg’s looking good, his intracranial pressure is under control and everything else is within normal limits. We’ll have to be patient. It’s a “wait and see” situation.’

‘That’s what I was told as well. That’s why I’m going home.’

‘What?’ Dom was shocked. ‘Home? To Isola Verde? When?’

‘I’m on my way now.’

Someone else who was making big decisions and taking leave without even consulting him was disturbing. Surely Giada felt the need to be close to their father at a time like this? She was certainly much closer to him than he was. Or she wanted to be, anyway. And, okay, maybe his little sister had been rebellious enough to cause Roberto some embarrassment years ago but the people of Isola Verde adored her and she’d been the King’s right-hand woman for a long time now. It was entirely to Giada’s credit that the fabulous new hospital was up and running.

‘Someone has to be there,’ Giada said into the silence. ‘What if this news gets out somehow? Can you imagine the instability it could cause? What if...?’ Dom could hear his sister trying to steady her voice. ‘What if he dies, Dom?’

‘He’s stable... He’s not in any immediate danger.’

Giada didn’t seem to hear him. ‘It’s you who should be going home. You’re the person that people need to see. They need to know that you care about the country you’re going to rule.’

‘I can’t just leave.’ The feeling of being torn between two places had been there for so long now, it was very familiar but it was stronger than ever today. Strong enough to be painful. ‘And someone needs to be here for Father. He came here for care in my hospital. I’m the one who can ensure that care is the best available.’

‘No, Dom...what he really came here for was to talk to you about the succession. To have enough time before his operation to persuade you to come home. In case...in case he didn’t survive the surgery.’

‘Why didn’t you tell me? Warn me?’ Perhaps Emilia wasn’t wrong to find secrets disturbing.

‘Papa forbade it. He’s afraid, Dom. Of what might happen if people find out before you’re back home to take the throne.’

His father...afraid...? The concept was alien. He’d always been a somewhat distant figure when the royal children were young and became even more so after their mother had died. Dom hadn’t even visited his homeland for years and had barely spoken to his father during that period. Did being afraid meant that Roberto cared about more than his country? That he might have difficulty showing it but he cared about his children? Yesterday’s guilt came back with a vengeance.

‘I’ve got to go,’ Giada said. ‘They’re calling our flight.’

‘Our?’

‘It’s not a private plane, Dom. Keep in touch, won’t you? Let me know if anything changes with Papa. I’ll come back as soon as I’m sure everything’s fine at home but I can get straight on a flight if I’m needed and be back in twelve hours.’

He had no right to try and persuade her to stay. He had taken himself out of her life as much as their father’s when he’d come to America to study and then work.

‘Of course I will,’ was all he said. ‘Safe travels, Gigi.’ Using her pet name gave him a lump in his throat. ‘I’ll miss you.’

He was missing her the moment he ended the call, in fact. He had his father upstairs in the ICU in a coma and the only other family he had was on her way back to Europe. His best friend wasn’t available to talk to either. Or was he?

Dom hit another speed dial number but he got a voice mail message that Lucas’s phone was either turned off or reception was unavailable. He left a message.

‘Don’t know what’s up, bro, but I’m here if you need a friend. Take care.’

Dom dropped his phone on his desk and rubbed his forehead with his middle finger. No family to talk to. No best friend. He hadn’t felt this alone for a long, long time. Closing his eyes, he heard that whisper at the back of his mind again.

You have no idea...

His eyes snapped open. He had Emilia’s number but he wasn’t going to ring, in case she was busy with a patient. He texted instead.

We got interrupted before. I’d still like to talk.

Discovery Park.

The largest green space in the city and one of the many great assets that Seattle was blessed with. There were hundreds of acres of land with views of the Olympic and Cascade mountains that were almost as spectacular as the ones Emilia had seen from the roof of Seattle General a couple of days ago. There were miles of beach, dramatic sea cliffs and sand dunes, forests and streams and, when Emilia didn’t have a whole day free that meant she could go as far as the Olympic National Park, or she simply wanted to be available within a reasonable amount of time for any seriously unwell patients, this was the place she always came. She could run, walk or simply sit somewhere to soak in the landscapes she loved and recharge her batteries.

It was normally a solitary activity but Dom’s text message yesterday struck her as being almost a plea. Maybe it had been the sincerity of what he’d said about them being so alike, even if that notion was ludicrous given what she’d just learned of his background. Or—and this had been something that had really touched Emilia—it was because he’d said he didn’t want to lose what they had. Because it was real...

So, she’d texted back and said she had a late start today and, if he had some free time, he was welcome to join her at the park for a jog. And here they were, jogging along a forest track, their breath creating white clouds in the frosty morning air. Emilia was leading the way. Because she knew the tracks of this park so well and where she wanted to go? Or was Dom allowing her to stay in front despite how easy it would be for him to use those long legs of his and turn this into a race? Oddly, that kind of rivalry that could turn anything into a competition was absent this morning. By the time they left the forest track and headed into open space towards the beach and the West Point lighthouse, they were jogging side by side. And then, by tacit consent, they slowed to a walk. In silence to start with, as they both needed to catch their breath.

It was Dom who broke the companionable silence as he turned to smile at Emilia.

‘Thanks.’

‘What for?’

‘Suggesting I come here. I never take advantage of spaces like this when I’ve only got an hour or two free but this...’ He made a sweeping gesture with his arm. ‘This is exactly what I needed.’

‘It’s gorgeous, isn’t it? That over there...’ Emilia pointed to the snow-capped mountain range in the distance. ‘That’s the Olympic National Park. If you want to clear your head and put your world to rights properly, then that’s the place to go. It takes nearly three hours to get there, though, so I don’t go that often but I love it. It’s my absolute favourite place in the world, now.’

‘I remember you used to love running. You were a real gym bunny back at med school.’

‘Only because I couldn’t take the time to find places like this.’

‘You looked like you were in love with treadmills whenever I got to the gym. I never used the one next to you because you looked like you could keep going for ever and do it faster and steeper than I could.’

Emilia laughed. ‘That’s what I wanted you to think. The truth was that I was dying inside and was scared that I’d fall flat on my face. Or have a heart attack or something.’

Dom’s grin lit up his face. ‘Really? It was for my benefit?’

‘I was using the old “fake it till you make it” strategy. It was obvious from the get-go that if I wanted to get noticed, you were the one I had to beat.’

‘We both pushed each other, that’s for sure. I wouldn’t have done nearly as well at school if you hadn’t been—how do you say it? Setting the post? No...it’s setting the bar, I think.’

The tiny slip in his command of American English was unusual enough to remind Emilia that he came from somewhere a long way away. And that that was only one of the differences between them.

‘And I might not have even got through school,’ she admitted, ‘if I hadn’t been trying to make sure I got higher marks than you every time.’

‘No...’ Dom shook his head. ‘Everybody knew you were a genius. You were years younger than any of us. You must have done your bachelor’s degree while you were still a teenager.’

Emilia shrugged. ‘I got fast-tracked. I had a teacher who coached me. Mrs Delaney. She probably saved my life, actually. If it hadn’t been for her, I was probably on my way to being in jail. Or dead.’ She swallowed hard. ‘Like my mom.’

She could hear their feet crunching on stones as they left the path to walk along the beach. Way ahead of them were the cluster of little buildings with the peak of the lighthouse on one of them. Pretty white structures with pink roofs that had the glorious background of the Olympic mountain range behind them.

‘Did you have any other family?’ Dom asked quietly.

Emilia shrugged. ‘Guess I have a father somewhere but I never knew who he was.’

‘And your mom really went to jail?’

‘Yeah...not until after they took me away when I was five. One of my foster families told me about it later. After they heard she’d died of an overdose as soon as she got out. And then they said that I was going to end up just like her and I’d better behave myself with my next family.’

‘Buon delore,’ Dom muttered. ‘You were just a little girl.’ He looked appalled but then, as he held Emilia’s gaze, his expression changed to something more like admiration. ‘But you won,’ he said softly. ‘You had such a tough start and yet, here you are—a beautiful woman. An amazing doctor. With the kind of position that you always dreamed of?’

Emilia nodded. ‘I have the perfect job. The perfect apartment. And places like this to come to when I’m not at work. I’m very lucky.’

It was true. She was very lucky, in every aspect of her life except the most personal but she wasn’t about to confess that failure to Dom. He’d never been short of women who’d been desperate to be his partner, even if it was only a short-lived fling.

‘I, too, have been very lucky,’ Dom said. ‘It always felt too good to be true that I was allowed to come here and study and then to work as a doctor. To be able to do it without anyone knowing who I was made it perfect and it went on for so much longer than I had dreamed it could. I’ve felt safe. Safe enough to suggest that this was where my father should come for his surgery but now...’ He shook his head. ‘Now it’s falling apart. I may have to leave Seattle General by Christmas. It’s past time I stepped up and became King.’

Emilia almost laughed. If someone had told her when she was young that, one day, she would be walking on a beach with a man about to become a king, she would probably have kicked them for teasing her. Here she was, doing it, and it still felt like a fantasy. Too good to be true...?

‘I should have done it a long time ago,’ Dom added. ‘My father is seventy-five. He should have been able to abdicate long ago. He should have had the support of his family to do that. I’ve been selfish.’

They were almost at the lighthouse now and they both slowed their steps further and then stopped. Emilia could see the guilt that Dom was grappling with. Shame, even, that he’d followed his dream instead of doing his duty?

‘You’re the one who’s an amazing doctor,’ she told him. ‘Have you ever stopped to count how many people are still alive because of what you gave up and how hard you’ve worked to become who you really wanted to be? That’s not selfish, Dom. It’s pretty heroic, if you ask me.’

His expression was changing again and Emilia found herself watching with fascination as she saw frown lines melting and eyes becoming dark with emotion. His smile was barely there, as if he didn’t want to take the compliment, but it was so warm it was thanking her for offering comfort.

It still felt too good to be true to be here with this man who was a prince and it also felt incredibly personal. This had to be the first time ever that they’d had a conversation that wasn’t about anything professional at all. This wasn’t even about the rivalry they’d always fostered.

This was about the connection between them that perhaps neither of them had ever tried to define. The connection that Dom had described as ‘real’. It was real. And it went deep. It had been brought sharply into focus by the extraordinary revelations of the last couple of days but even more so by Dom saying that he might have to leave Seattle by Christmas. A matter of only weeks away and he was going to vanish from her life for ever and that thought was enough to squeeze Emilia’s chest so hard it was impossible to drag in a new breath. As impossible as it was to break that eye contact with Dom.

What this was really about was admitting how much she cared for this man, wasn’t it? She’d had her suspicions the other day when she’d seen how rattled he was in the ER and again, in his office when she’d appealed for him to tell her the truth about what was going on but this was even bigger.

So big that she knew it was about to shake the foundations of her life.

How ironic was this? To find out that she felt so strongly about Domenico di Rossi when she’d just learned how impossible it was that they could ever be together in any way?

Except...maybe that was precisely why these feelings were bubbling to the surface. Because it was safe.

Because nothing was ever going to happen between them. Or nothing more than what had already happened, anyway. Finally, Emilia was able to drag her gaze away from Dom’s. She shifted it to her watch.

‘I’m running out of time,’ she told him. ‘I’ll have to run back to the car park. Feel free to take your time, Dom.’

‘Ha... I don’t think so.’

The way Dom seemed to become even taller reminded her of days long gone when the marks to a quiz or test had been released and her name had been first on the list. He was stepping up to a new challenge. He caught her gaze as they both turned, poised to break into a run and she could see a glimpse of sheer pleasure in his eyes. More than that, even. A new connection because there was more truth between them now?

Whatever. Emilia had a very good reason to stay in front of Dom right now. She didn’t want him to guess what had been going through her mind seconds ago. She didn’t want to remember it herself and running as fast as possible was a great way to put it behind her. She took off, throwing no more than a smile and a few words over her shoulder.

‘Eat my dust...’