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I leave Helen at the table. Ninety per cent of the plan has already come together in my head. It’s going to be perfect. Dom will get to feel helpful and supportive, which will make him feel extra protective of me, and I’ll get to work out what to do about Tania and a get brand new, totally free driving instructor. It’s genius.
I stop at the counter on my way out of the canteen. Dad likes a snack after long meetings. I glance at my watch. It’s before twelve. That means they’ll still be serving his favourite. I order a bacon sandwich on white bread with extra brown sauce. What Tania doesn’t know won’t hurt her, will it?
At the door to the office I stop. There’s somebody sitting at my desk spinning idly in the chair. ‘Comfortable there?’
The spinner stops, looks up and smiles. Alex. I haven’t seen him properly since the day Dom’s dad died. I tell myself I haven’t thought about him either. ‘You weren’t here. I decided to wait.’ He points. ‘Your parcel is dripping.’
The brown sauce has breached the napkin I’ve wrapped round the sandwich, and is running onto my hand. ‘Wait there.’ I run into Dad’s office and deposit the sandwich.
He frowns. ‘Tania doesn’t think I should have too much red meat.’
I wink at him. ‘Our little secret then.’
Back in my own office Alex has stopped spinning in my chair and is now going through my in-tray. I snatch the handful of papers off him and put them back on the ‘To Do probably at some point’ pile. ‘What can I do for you?’
He shrugs. ‘So, let me get this right? You live with your dad and work for your dad?’
‘Yes. And?’
He shakes his head. ‘And nothing.’
I move around the desk and wait for him to vacate my seat. He stands up slowly and, rather than waiting for me to sit down so he can get past, he slides between me and the wall. For a second our bodies contact all the way from the shoulders down to our knees. Our eyes lock together. I could lean forward just a fraction right now and kiss him. It would be so easy. I don’t, of course, but just for a moment I’m aware that I could. He’s smiling. I have no idea whether I’m smiling too. I’m struggling to remember to breathe. It’s a very, very long second, and then it’s over.
He moves to the other side of the desk. ‘They said I had to bring my bank details and national insurance number in. Apparently that’s why I’ve never been paid and you’re the person to fix it.’
‘I’m the person.’ I’m staring at him with my mouth wide open.
‘Good.’ He puts a sheet of paper with his name, a sort code and account number scrawled on it, and his national insurance card on the desk in front of me.
I’m still staring. Must stop staring. Must pick up piece of paper and do things with the paper. I can’t for the life of me remember what things. Breathe Emily. Breathe. Bank details. Yes. ‘I have to put them on the ...’ I point at the screen on my desk. I have to put the details into the screen box thingy.
‘I can wait.’
‘No.’ I grab a notepad and write down his national insurance number. ‘I mean you don’t need to. I’ve got everything I need.’
He shrugs. ‘Fair enough. I’ll see you later then lovely Emily.’
I nod. He walks out of my office and straight down the corridor opposite. I watch him. I can’t stop watching him. I shake my head. I don’t like skinny boys. I like real men, like Dom.