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Alex stared at the notebook in front of him. The words were in his writing, but he couldn’t get his brain to make sense of the scribble. Across the dining table from him Helen shook her head. ‘I thought you wanted to help me with this.’
‘Sorry.’ He tried to smile. ‘Where were we?’
‘I’d given you my brilliant “why I want to work here” answer. Traditionally at that point the interviewer asks another question.’
‘Sorry.’ Interview practice. That was the thing. He was helping Helen prepare for her interview. ‘So why do you want to work here?’
Helen leant across the table and took the notepad from his hands. ‘We’ve done that one. You should now be asking me ...’ She skimmed through his notes. ‘Where do I see myself in five years’ time?’
Alex dragged his attention into the room and clasped his hands in front of him in a serious-interviewer sort of a way. ‘So, Miss Hart—’
‘Doctor Hart.’
‘Don’t interrupt the interviewer. It makes you seem snarky.’
‘Well if they don’t know that I’m a doctor I will be snarky.’
‘And also unemployed.’ Alex reclasped his hands. ‘So Doctor Hart, where do you see yourself in five years’ time?’
Helen wittered something about further research goals, and working towards senior lecturer status. Alex zoned out. Five years’ time. In five years’ time he’d be thirty-two. He did the maths in his head. When his Dad was thirty-two, Alex was already eleven. That meant that when his parents were his age, they had a six year old child, and a mortgage, and a sensible car. When his parents had been his age, they were already grown up. Alex was a child by comparison. It was the sort of realisation that he normally greeted with pure relief. He looked across the table. ‘But really?’
Helen looked confused. ‘What?’
‘Forget the interview answer, where do you really see yourself in five years’ time?’
Her brow furrowed. ‘Well I want to extend my research in to domestic work and gender divisions. I’m really interested in male household roles, and how they were perceived.’
Alex shook his head. ‘I said not your interview answer.’
‘But that is what I want to be doing in five years’ time.’
‘Really?’
She nodded. ‘What about you?’
Alex froze. ‘I have no idea.’ He closed his eyes for a second and tried to picture the future. He’d never been able to picture anything very much beyond his next meal, and he’d never wanted to. He’d meant what he’d told Emily. You had to live in the moment. Right now was all there was.