Peter called Teddy into his trailer between takes.
“You had something you wanted to discuss?” Teddy said.
“Oscar night. We have to work out the logistics.”
“Ah, yes. You have it figured out yet?”
“To the extent that I can. For reasons that defy understanding, the awards are being held at the Grande Palladium Theater this year, instead of the usual venue. Which is a pain, because you can’t get a sense of where everything is by watching previous Oscars ceremonies.”
“I’m sure it will be the same.”
“Some things never change. Celebrities will be walking the red carpet for the pre-Oscar show. You and Tessa will have to do that.”
“Oh, hell.”
“You’ll be fine. Most of the questions will be aimed at Tessa. I’d appreciate it if you’d jump in if anyone is giving her a hard time.”
“I’m going to be with Tessa?”
“Yes. I’ve ordered the two of you a limo. It will drop you off right on the red carpet. Hattie, Ben, and I will go in quietly together. Not a recognizable face in the lot of us. We can walk in practically unscathed.”
“You’re an Oscar-nominated director. An interview wouldn’t kill you.”
Peter grinned. “That doesn’t mean I have to do one. Anyway, Ben and Tessa are coming over for drinks beforehand. I figured you’d join us and we’d all leave from there.”
“What time?”
“Around three. I suggested earlier, and the girls howled. Apparently there’s something about dressing for these occasions that requires half the day.”
“Yeah, the gowns get more ink than the awards. Luckily, a tux always looks like a tux.”
“You’re wearing a tux?”
“Absolutely. I’ll have to be two people. I don’t have to change if they’re both wearing a tux.”
“Good point.”
“The order of the awards works for us. The first one given is always Best Supporting Actor. The presenter will read the nominees. The camera will cut to me sitting with Tessa. That will establish that Mark Weldon is there and is in the audience.
“Best Picture is the last award. So, about halfway through the show Mark Weldon will get up and go to the bathroom. Sometime after that, producer Billy Barnett will come in and take his place with you, Hattie, and Ben.”
“That’s fine in theory,” Peter said.
“What do you mean, ‘in theory’?”
“Well, in your little scenario, you’re in the audience sitting next to Tessa after your category’s called.”
“Yeah. So?”
“Well, what happens if you win? You’ve got to accept the award, and even after that you can’t go back down the steps into the audience. Don’t they spirit you off somewhere and shoot footage of you and do backstage interviews and all that?”
“I hadn’t thought of that.”
“Well, think of it now. What happens if you win?”
Teddy considered. “Well, I don’t think we’ll have to worry.”
“Why not?”
“Hell will have frozen over.”