I’m not sure when I lost consciousness, but when I come to, the first thing I smell is death.

And I don’t care.

Because everything is pain.

My skin is split in so many places that each breath hurts a hundred times over. There’s another sensation, too, a more pleasant one. Like warm, soothing balm is being dripped across me in the bathhouse.

But it’s not fragrant oil. It’s blood.

The guards left standing are shouting at one another. In between, something growls and roars and there’s the terrible crunch of human bone breaking.

Then it’s quiet, quiet enough to hear nothing but the beat of huge shadowy wings. Quiet enough for me to hear my own life pumping slowly but inevitably onto the floor as my beast swoops and circles the air over me, searching for more prey.

Then there’s another shadow over me, and it’s much nearer, and it’s human. It’s that guard from the Aphorai palace. What was his name? I can’t remember. Did I ever know?

“Rakel.” My voice feels foreign in my throat, as if it’s not my own. “Where is she?”

The guard’s face blanches as he looks down at me. “Gone. Escaped in the chaos.”

Relief washes over me, stronger than the pain, stronger than the shock.

“Please,” I croak. “Please, just end it.”

He looks to the ceiling high above us, my eyes following his gaze, sure that this will be the last thing they ever register. Then he draws his sword.

The pain threatens to crowd out my thoughts.

But there’s still something beneath …

Her defiance in the face of the sandstorm. Her smile across so many campfires. Her voice guiding me from the caves and my own darkness. Our embrace at the Edurshai camp. Taking my hand as we sat on the Lautus causeway, legs dangling above the water. Warmth curled against me the night I shivered and sweated through the aftermath of testing the cure.

“Survive,” I whisper.

My chest lowers with a ragged breath.

I let my eyes close.