MARITZA

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We also spoke with Benita’s niece, Maritza, while visiting Benita’s house in Koray. Maritza stays at Benita’s house when she needs to visit a psychiatric clinic nearby. Maritza lives in Les Cayes with her mother, father, and brother. She most likely has schizophrenia and told us that her illness started when she was twenty-one. Before she started treatment at the clinic, she was taken by her family to a houngan, a Vodou priest.

My family should have brought me to the doctor a long time ago. They never did. I believe in doctors, very much so. Doctors can find something to alleviate it for me. The medicines help me.

At the clinic, they give me pills, medicines, they give me shots. The shots make me dizzy. I can’t sleep at all. I have a sleeping problem. I’m waking up around 3 a.m. I need to wake up at 4 a.m., even when it’s hard to wake up.

The medicine, it’s not good, it’s not too bad. I’m a little calmer now. Sometimes I’m worse when I take it. Sometimes when I take it, I become very difficult. Yesterday, I made a big spectacle here at Benita’s house. I made a lot of noise.

When people want to talk to me, I can sit and talk like normal. They say I’m crazy, but I know I’m not crazy. In the name of Jesus, I know I am not crazy. Sometimes, I don’t know what I am doing. Sometimes, I tell you, Dyab Rasyal comes.1 When you are in public, in society, that’s when it wants to come to put you to shame. Do you understand?