Chapter 23

CALLING ALL GODS!

That night, after tutoring Stevie with multiplication-table flash cards his little brother let us borrow, I’m about to crawl into bed. But I decide to say a prayer first.

“Hi, God. It’s me again. Jamie Grimm. Thanks for, you know, everything. That sunset tonight was awesome. One of your ten best. Love how you worked in all those golds and purples. Oh, and thank you for not letting my cousin Stevie kill me today, especially when he got stuck on his nine times tables.

“Anyway, I’m not really here tonight to pray for myself. If it’s okay, I need to ask a favor for a friend, a great guy named Joey Gaynor. Don’t let his tattoos or nose ring fool you. Joey has a good heart. Seriously. He was one of the few kids in Long Beach to be nice to me when I, you know, rolled into town. Now he’s in big trouble. They say he’s been stealing stuff at school. I don’t think it’s true, but, well, you might have some inside information on that, since you are omniscient and have videos of everything everybody down here does every day.

“But even if Joey did steal, well, I’m sure he feels terrible about it now. He’ll give it all back, too. So please, God, don’t let them kick him out of school. Maybe he made a mistake. You know what they say: ‘To err is human, to forgive is divine.’ And they don’t get any more divine than you, sir, so I hope you’ll cut Joey some slack. Like I said, he’s a good kid. I swear on a stack of Bibles, a book I’m sure you’re familiar with. It’s a good read, sir. Action, adventure, life lessons. I don’t mean to go all brownnoser on you here, but, well, whatever you can do for Joey, er, Joseph, will be greatly appreciated. Thanks for listening. Have a good night. If, you know, it’s night where you are.

“Oh, and please take good care of my mom and dad and my little sister. Tell them I miss them. I miss them a lot.”

Okay. Done. I tried, anyway.

I lock my chair at an angled position next to my bed, putting one fist at my hip and another at the edge of the mattress. I rock forward on my bed arm and use the hand by my hip to push my weight off the chair and transfer it onto the bed. Once I’m on, I put both hands behind my hips and get ready to slide myself up the covers.

But I stop.

Because I think Gaynor may need a few more prayers.

So I plead his case to Apollo, Hera, Poseidon, Dionysus, and Artemis—Greek gods I read about in Rick Riordan’s books.

And while I’m at it…

I toss up a few quick pleas to the top god from that movie The Immortals and ask Zeus to lend Gaynor his Warhammer of Ares, the thing Zeus used to smash the Titans’ Epirus Bow to bits. I also have a quick chat with the Norse god Odin (you know, Anthony Hopkins) from that other movie Thor.

Hey, Gaynor needs all the help he can get.

I just hope God (or one of his backups) is listening.