There was nothing like a county fair on a breezy California day. Eighty-eight degrees with wisps of white stretching across the blue sky. JT sat at a picnic table, legs stretched out in front of him, elbows resting on the table behind him. The crowd moved in front of him like salmon swimming in both directions, and JT kept his eye on the bathroom exit to make sure he didn’t miss the girls coming out. Simon sat beside him, doing the same.
The event spread across an open field used for everything from air shows to concerts. The pinging and popping of games, each with their own music and blinking lights, filled the air. Screams from a nearby ride grew loud, then soft as it spun and rolled the willing victims on a lopsided wheel.
“So tell me again how you ended up inviting Paige to the fair?”
He heard the laughter in Simon’s voice. “Don’t make me regret letting you come.”
“Letting me? You couldn’t have stopped me. Watching you fall will be highly entertaining.”
“I told you. It’s not like that.”
“You can tell me all you want. I see how you look at her.”
He tried to ignore his friend, but he knew it was true. Even in the midst of all the chaos, he’d been acutely aware of her every movement since he’d picked her up two hours ago. Every time he felt her beside him or heard her voice, his heart thrummed in his chest.
“For someone who doesn’t get involved, you’re looking pretty involved.”
Simon gestured to the mostly eaten blue cotton candy in JT’s hand and the purple giraffe behind him. “I told you. We were talking and it just slipped out.”
Simon laughed. “For someone who doesn’t talk a lot, you sure are doing a lot of talking.”
Yeah. He’d noticed, but he was different around Casey and Paige. Something he’d have to think about later.
“I don’t see you complaining,” JT said.
“Nope. What’s to complain about? There’s seventy-five different foods on a stick. No, man, I think it’s great. Sweet girl. Sweet mom.”
“And Jenny.” JT snuck a glance at his friend, curious for his reaction.
“Yep.”
JT straightened his right leg, pushing his prosthetic heel into the ground to get a stretch in his quad.
Their attention was caught by Jenny’s wildly waving hand. Wearing cutoffs, a yellow crop top, and her perpetual smile, she moved toward them with Casey in her arms.
Casey had walked fine with her prosthesis as far as he could tell, but she’d ditched it an hour ago. He assured Paige it wasn’t unusual for her to get tired when she wasn’t used to walking in it for long periods. Hell, half the kids here were being carried or pushed in strollers, and she barely weighed anything. He didn’t mind carrying her. But he was growing more convinced that there was nothing wrong with the device itself.
He’d checked her stump closely when she took it off, and found nothing. Her gait was near normal, would probably be even better in a prosthetic he designed. And most of all, when she was otherwise occupied, she didn’t mention or seem to notice it at all.
“Hey, guys. Here we are,” Jenny said, joining them. She sat Casey beside him on top of the table.
“Where’s Paige?” he asked, which got him another amused look from his friend that he noticed Jenny shared.
“She’s coming. We got Little Bit here cleaned up, and then the girl’s bathroom line exploded.” Jenny produced a folded-up piece of paper from her pocket. “There’s a beer festival on the other side.” She handed the flyer to Simon. “Want to check it out?”
“Sure.”
“Well, come on, big guy. Let’s bust a move.” Jenny kissed Casey on the head. “Have fun. Win me something pretty.”
Simon stood and looked down at JT. “Catch up with you later, man. Or not.”
And with a laugh from the fun-loving, take-nothing-serious pair, they were off.
“So,” Casey said, swinging her foot beside him, “what do you want to talk about?”
He angled his head up and back to see her face. Something about the way Casey made conversation always made him smile. Pretty much everything about Casey and Paige made him smile. “I don’t know. What do you want to talk about?”
“We can talk about Miss Miller. She’s gonna be my teacher and I’m going to meet her soon. Barbara is her other name, but I won’t call her that.”
“Probably a good idea.”
“Did your mom say you had to go to kindergarten?”
Uh-oh. Touchy subject. “Yes.”
“Did you cry?”
“No. I don’t think so.” He didn’t really remember.
“I’m gonna scream,” she announced evenly.
“Really?” He tried not to grin at her decision. “Why are you going to scream?”
“ ’Cause I hate it.” She picked up her cotton candy. Finding it old and hard, she licked it a few times and put it back.
“Oh. Well, what do you think will happen when you scream?”
She screwed up her face in thought. “I guess the fire department will have to come ’cause someone’s screaming so loud.”
Go big or go home, he thought and smiled to himself. “And then what?”
“I don’t know. I’m only five. Does your mom let you spell your name with letters?”
Huh?
“A J and a T on your papers.” She made the letters in the air in front of her.
“Yeah, I guess she did.” He’d never thought about his mom letting him. Even though his mom called him Jacob, or often Jacob Thomas, everyone else called him JT, so that’s what he’d done. He still had no idea why he’d told Paige his name was Jake.
“My mom makes me write all the letters and not just a K and C, and s’s are really hard to make. So are y’s.” She let out a heavy sigh. “Your mom’s nice.”
“Yes.” His mom was nice, even if she had smothered him with concern after the accident to the point he’d felt suffocated. “Your mom’s nice too,” he said, seeing Paige exit the bathroom.
Everything about her captured him. The way she watched out for Casey with an eagle eye, but forced herself to step back when he knew she’d rather help. She ignored any staring or odd looks, and Casey didn’t seem to notice it either. That was a true gift. She answered Casey’s myriad of questions as fast as she could fire them off. She had a quick laugh, and an even quicker smile. Too often it faded just as quickly, replaced by a film of worry and responsibility.
“Maybe you could talk to her for me? About the letters?” Casey said, calling back his attention.
“I’ll do my best.”
Paige searched the crowd and he raised his hand to get her attention. When she found them, her eyes met his and there it was again, that punch to his gut. He picked up Casey and all their stuff and started toward her.
“Hey,” Paige said, reaching them. “Sorry, long line. Where’s Jenny?”
“Jenny and Simon decided to hit the beer tent on the other side of the festival grounds.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. They said they’d catch up with us later. What’s wrong?”
Paige narrowed her eyes in the direction he’d pointed. “Nothing. I just…I can’t believe she left me.”
“Why?” he asked, confused by her somewhat-panicked expression.
“Maybe ’cause Jenny said you’re too hot and I’m not big enough to chap-a-rone,” Casey told him. “I’m not hot. Are you?”
Paige’s sweet mouth dropped open in a perfect O and her eyes went wide at her daughter. “Thank you, Casey Marie.”
His face broke into a wide grin at the blush staining Paige’s cheeks, and the way she’d turned her head hoping he wouldn’t see it.
“You’re welcome,” Casey answered sweetly, then pointed to a ride. “Can we go on that?”
“Sure.” They started toward the ride, Paige falling in beside him. He didn’t understand all he was feeling, but at least it wasn’t completely one-sided.
They walked over well-worn grass littered with crushed tickets and candy-apple sticks. It brought a sudden memory of being young, his feet pounding dry fairground dirt, an abandoned chunk of cotton candy stuck to the bottom of his shoe. He’d run on both feet that day, from ride to ride, booth to booth.
It struck him that today he was doing something he’d done before the accident and enjoying it just as much. Maybe more. There was something about Casey looking at him with her sky-blue eyes and Paige’s rare, carefree moments that made him feel not quite so knocked down. Enough that the tight bands of guilt around his heart loosened just a bit.
From their place in line, the three of them watched the ride. As it picked up speed, the small seats hanging from chains flew out from a center that was lit up with gold lights.
“This one’s just for kids,” Paige was saying. “You’ll have to go by yourself, Case.”
Casey studied the ride for a long moment, then turned her gaze to him for reassurance that warmed his heart.
“Looks fun to me,” he said.
“Me too. I can do it.”
Paige didn’t look so sure as they shuffled closer to the front. Their turn came and he let Casey point out the seat she wanted and he helped her in. He’d never given much thought to fair-ride inspections. Until now.
He checked the chains and how they were attached, pressed hard against the seatback and looked up to the top.
Paige waited beside him. “Is it okay?”
“Yeah. It’s good. Just wanted to make sure she was in.” They stepped back and a young attendant made his rounds, checking that each child was secure. When the employee moved to the next kid, JT went back to Casey.
“I checked it,” the guy said.
“Right,” JT answered. “And I’m checking it again.”
“Parents have to wait there. Behind that rail.”
“I got that.” He turned his attention back to Casey. “You good?” She nodded and bumped knuckles with him. “Stay here when it stops and I’ll come and get you.”
He and Paige moved to their designated spot among a line of parents holding up their phones for pictures or videos. A few of them even had real cameras. He noticed Paige had neither. His mom hadn’t gone anywhere without hers. Maybe he’d get Paige a camera.
Casey waved as the ride started a slow rotation until she was out of sight.
Paige leaned to the right and left. “I don’t see her, do you?”
“Not yet.” They were so close her shoulder brushed his arm. Her side pressed against his every time she leaned to the left.
Seconds passed.
“I still don’t see her,” she said. The ride turned so slowly it seemed forever before she came back into view. Casey smiled and waved, her foot dangling two feet off the ground now.
It made another cycle and again the wait.
“Do you think she’s big enough for this?” Paige’s voice was laced with concern.
“Yes. She’ll be fine.” But even as he said it, his stomach tightened. Relatively speaking, it was a small-children’s ride, but it was high and she was so little. She passed a few more times as the ride picked up speed and the swings flew out.
Squinting against the sun, he stood side by side with Paige and searched each face that flew by.
“There!” He pointed as Casey passed, holding on to the chain of her swing with one hand and waving madly with the other.
“She loves it.” Paige released an anxious sigh beside him. “It’s not her leg. I’m just not big on heights. Or fast things. I hope she doesn’t puke,” she added with a soft laugh.
“Puking’s kind of a fair rite of passage, isn’t it?”
She gave him a sideways glance. “I could do without that rite.”
They continued watching for Casey, waving each time she went past.
After a minute, Paige’s attention was still on the ride, but his was on her.
“This is so great,” she said, almost with a sigh.
It was great. Paige, happy and smiling, a noticeable weight lifted off her shoulders. Several pale strands had slipped free from her ponytail to curve at her cheekbones. It was impossible not to want her. Impossible not to fantasize about pulling her hair down and running his fingers through the hair he knew to be silky soft, or imagine dragging his lips along her damp neck. Her sundress was held up by the tiniest straps, delicate like she was, and he imagined with just the slightest effort he could slip them off her shoulders. Damn. He needed to think about something else.
“Casey had a few things to say about kindergarten,” he said.
“Really?” She looked at him, surprised. “Like what?”
“I think her exact words were, ‘I’m going to scream,’ and then something about fire trucks coming.”
“Oh Lord.” Paige half laughed, then ran her hands over her face. “It’s really out of character for her to be so nervous. She’s not usually shy or hesitant.”
“Nope. Definitely wouldn’t call her shy.”
Paige shook her head, but smiled, the love and joy and worry of being a parent clear on her face. “I don’t know if the fact she has to wear her prosthesis all day is making her not want to go to kindergarten, or if not wanting to go to kindergarten is fueling her determination not to wear it. I shouldn’t have told her she’d have to wear it almost all day at school.”
“Was it the truth?”
“Yeah.”
He gave her a look like she made the obvious right choice.
“I know. And I was just trying to prepare her. I mean, she can take it off in the classroom or nap time, at least I don’t think that would be a problem, but there’s a lot of walking from activity to activity. There’s gym, and lunch, and the playground, and it’s not like she’s hampered by it, at least I don’t think so. She runs, she climbs at the park.”
They watched the ride go around again. “You know, there are tales that I didn’t want to go to school. I’ll have to ask my mom the whole story.”
“Did you scream? Get any fire trucks?”
He smiled at her teasing tone. “I don’t think so. Gotta give her points for creativity.” They were quiet a moment. “I could do more tests, scans, a new socket, new socks, but my gut is telling me it’s not physical.”
“That’s what I was afraid of.”
Her brow was furrowed again. “But you’ve got a few weeks, right? There’s still time for a turnaround. Time for her to be one with her prosthesis. And if it’s kindergarten in general, maybe there’s other things you can do. School supplies are always a good way to get pumped up for school. The power of new crayons and all.”
Paige smiled at him, nodding in agreement, but he could see her mind was somewhere else. He wanted it back here, with him. “So you think I’m hot, huh?”
That did it.
Paige sucked in a shocked breath that drew his eyes to her rising chest. She started to look at him, then changed her mind and stared straight ahead.
“I didn’t say that. Jenny said that.” She licked her lips.
“Oh. So you don’t think I’m hot?” He’d never had fun with a woman, not this kind of fun, and the blush staining her cheeks was sexy as hell. So was the obvious guilty expression.
“You know what you look like. Women would wallpaper their bedrooms with your face,” she muttered. “I bet you have plenty of women to tell you that.”
“Not in a while.” He grinned. Was she jealous?
He could stand here all day, staring down into Paige’s upturned face. Her expression guilty and embarrassed, a little exasperated, and if he wasn’t mistaken, there was a good bit of desire in those blue eyes as well. Her cheeks were pink and the sunlight hit her eyes at just the right angle to make them sparkle and he shook his head. He wanted to say that he couldn’t look at her without wanting to kiss her, without needing to. But the ride slowed and the swings descended. “I’ll go get Casey.”