It’s really your parents’ fault. But how were they supposed to know that the Gee-Whiz ElectroShock Toilet Trainer wasn’t the latest scientific development? Now you’ve got the cleanest apartment in town and a five-dollar-a-day Bon Ami habit. You’re on a first-name basis with E. coli And you know it’s a none-too-spic-’n’-span world out there, chock full of lax personal hygiene and shrimp somebody forgot to devein. Given the propensity of hairnets for finding their way into corn dogs, you probably like to know exactly what’s in food before you eat it. Well, tough. The processed-food industry isn’t a restaurant, and you’ll have to take what everyone else is eating. Food is not enough; most people want mystery. Secret recipes, secret sauces, secret spices. Millions of hearty eaters like postindustrial je ne sais quoi and are willing to pay for it. If there’s a life beyond Dr Pepper, it’s as welcome at the Safeway as a wet cleanup in aisle nine. Mom was right: Don’t play with your food; you never know where it’s been.
But how can big companies keep their secret recipes secret from the hundreds of employees who prepare the stuff? They can’t. As the following pages demonstrate, the corporate grapevines have plenty to say.