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Tillie tried to do her rounds, but so much had changed that it didn’t feel as comforting as she had expected. There were fewer sleepers at the school, but still too many for the clinic. The caretakers weren’t only male now which she found reassuring. She walked through the gym checking on all the familiar faces to make sure that they were being cared for adequately.
With more of the sleepers waking, Angus had said he had enough data for a forecast. He had worked through a number of scenarios and had made a few lists of who might wake next. She was especially worried about Bridget and two other pregnant women. They needed extra nutrition for the growing babies. Going without solid food for a day or two wasn’t a big problem, but the longer they slept, the greater danger it became.
Bug walked down the aisle towards her looking happy. “Two more woke this morning,” he said in greeting. “Just like Angus said.”
“Which list?” she demanded.
“Um.” Bug looked over his shoulder as if he could see the paper on the other side of the room. “Don’t remember.”
“Not a problem. I’ll go take a look.” Tillie gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder as she passed him. He flinched at her touch. His smile suddenly apologetic. It was a reminder of the baggage that everyone carried these days. She wondered what life had thrown at him to make him fear a casual touch. “Nobody’s normal,” she muttered.
“Tillie?” James stood up from where he’d been examining a sleeper. “Were you speaking to me?”
“Just grumbling,” she said.
He came over to join her at the make-shift nursing station. “Things are looking up. More women are awake.”
“Yes, that’s a good thing.”
“But?” James asked.
She nodded toward Bug who was at the far end of the room filling bowls with broth and loading them on to a rolling cart. “I tried to give him a pat...”
“He doesn’t like to be touched,” James explained.
“I don’t think that’s it. He expected me to hurt him.” She sighed as she looked out over the sleepers. “We are broken. We all carry so much pain with us. How can we build a hopeful, thriving community when there is such fear and sorrow in us?”
“It is those experiences that teach us love and forgiveness.”
“Really?” She looked at James. As a biobot sold to the military, he must have had a difficult life. It wasn’t anything she could really understand. By Zero Year, she had been a successful woman in a good marriage with children and grandchildren and just starting to think about retirement. A far cry from the regimented and isolated life James must have led.
“Helen taught me that,” James said of his partner.
“Is she awake?”
James shook his head. “But if Angus is right, I am expecting her to wake later today.”
Tillie hoped that Angus wasn’t right. His calculations were based on the age of the woman and her estimated fertility. That disturbed her on levels she couldn’t even begin to explain. She forced a smile for James but from the puzzled look on his face, didn’t fool him. She got back to her rounds, checking supplies and linens and volunteer rosters. She stopped in the kitchen to see how Eunice was, then went to town to check in with Mary. While she was in town, she went over to the warehouse to make sure that all was well while Nick was out of town.
Everything seemed to be running along smoothly. She went on to the Transition House to make sure Ted had everything he needed. He had taken on the huge responsibility of caring for the babies of the sleepers. She had been duly impressed with how well he’d done.
The lobby wasn’t a giant playpen anymore. A lot of the children had been able to go home as soon as their mothers woke up. There was the sound of children’s laughter and running feet. Tillie had to smile just hearing it. She headed to the kitchen getting a whiff of cooking aromas. Ted was standing at the stove stirring a huge pot with a baby on his hip. He looked so domestic it made her laugh. The room was packed with helpers doing all sorts of things.
“Tillie, come in. How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine.” She sat at the table where he gestured. Someone brought her a cup of tea and a messy jam sandwich.
“Sorry,” Ted said with a patient smile. “Our sandwich maker is in training.”
Tillie smiled back. This was what she had needed−a busy kitchen with the bustle of people happily working together. Since they had moved out of the school, she hadn’t been around that on a daily basis any more. Now, she realized how much she missed it.
Ted handed the baby off to a young girl who tickled it until it giggled. He sat down next to her, woofing out a weary sigh. “Feels good to get off my feet,” he said.
“You deserve a break.”
“Yes, well, I’ve been thinking about things and well...”
“Yes?” Tillie took a bite of her sandwich surprised to find a little cream cheese hiding under the jam.
“Nixie and I would like to get married as soon as her parents can get here. We finally heard back. They are already on the road.” He grinned. “And then we’d like to take a trip.”
“A honeymoon?” Tillie yelped.
“Well...” Ted blushed, hanging his head shyly.
“Where do you want to go?”
“We’ve been talking. Maybe we’ll just take the train all the way to the other coast.”
An avalanche of memories tried to overwhelm her. Marriages: her own, her daughter’s, a cousin’s. Visions of white dresses and tall wedding cakes clouded her vision. She didn’t realize how lost she’d become until Ted grabbed her hand.
“I’m so sorry,” he said. “I’ve made you remember something painful.”
“No,” she said wiping away a tear. “You’ve made me remember how wonderful it all was.”