Keith’s mind was racing before Torie started talking. Now it was in a tailspin that made him almost dizzy. Had he heard her correctly?
Reading his thoughts, Torie said, “You heard me right. Let’s go into the living room where it’s more comfortable.”
Keith nodded and followed her into the other room but still couldn’t find his voice. Or a single damn thing to say. She could’ve knocked him over with a feather after that revelation.
They settled in on the couch together, Torie turned sideways to face him, one of her mile-long legs tucked underneath her. Her hands sat folded in her lap, one hand toying with her fingernails on the other. He recognized her MO when she was nervous.
He took her right hand in his and held it tight. “You can tell me as much or as little as you want, Torie.”
She propped her elbow on the back of the couch and leaned her head on her hand. “No. I want to tell you. I’ve never told anyone. I think it’s time.”
He kissed her hand then enveloped it in both of his. He needed to be close to her, feel as if he was protecting her somehow.
“After my brother left, my mom was a mess. Her world was spinning out of control. My dad was a loaded gun, we never knew when he’d go off. She’d tried to get my brother off drugs, but it was no use. It was his escape from our world. He tried to protect my mom and took some good beatings for it, but in the end, he just couldn’t stay.”
“Did your mom and brother know what your dad was doing to you?” Saying the words out loud made Keith’s blood boil. He decided right then and there if he ever came across Torie’s father, the man wouldn’t leave the room alive.
“Not at first. I was ashamed and thought she’d be mad at me.”
Keith squeezed her hand then wiped a tear that slid down her face.
“She eventually figured it out. Thankfully, she wasn’t mad at me. It ended up being the last straw and what motivated her to leave him.”
“She was planning on leaving him?”
Torie nodded. “She mapped out a plan of how to sneak away. He was crazy diligent in how he kept track of her, but she thought she’d found away around it. We were going to go live with Gram.”
“What happened?”
“My dad found out. He came after me, saying it was all my fault she wanted to go. Mom stepped in, tried to protect me. When she did, he threw her across the room. She landed on a glass table. Died instantly.”
Keith pulled Torie into his lap and held her. She tucked her face into his neck and sobbed. She could soak every damn shirt he owned if it helped her heal. Even in the craziest corners of his imagination, he never could’ve come up with the story she just told him. Never.
Torie pulled back and looked at him. “I have to tell you the rest.”
A strand of her hair had come loose from her clip. He gently tucked it behind her ear.
“No, Dragonfly. You don’t.”
“I do. Believe it or not, this is helping. To unload all this feels...right. I’m just sorry to unload it all on you.”
He grazed her forehead with his lips. “I’m not. I’m honored you chose me to share this with. You’ve carried it alone for way too long.”
She nodded and crawled out of his lap but sat next to him with her legs draped over his, his hands resting on her knees.
She continued her story right where she’d left off. “I ran. Hauled it to the neighbor’s house. I couldn’t speak, but the whole town knew what my dad was like. The woman took one look at my face and called the police. Dad was carried off to jail and I was sent to live with Gram.”
She took a deep breath, let it out again. “Flash forward to years later. I changed my last name, took my mother’s maiden name, became a cop, and have kept track of my dad ever since. Frank helps me keep an eye on him. I guess he knows the whole story, but that’s it. My brother contacts me from time to time. He has my cell number. Knows I’ll help him if I can, but since I won’t give him money, we don’t talk often.”
Keith rubbed his hands along her legs, a gesture of comfort to her but more of a need for him to touch her, know for his own peace of mind she was okay. Physically, anyway. Sitting there listening to her story made emotions run through him he didn’t know he had. He couldn’t imagine her carrying this alone all these years.
“So why is Frank worried for you now?”
“All this time Dad’s been in prison. He couldn’t get to me. However, due to a technicality, he just made parole and didn’t show for the meeting with his parole officer. No one knows where he is.”
The hair on the back of Keith’s neck stood on end. “And what makes Frank, or you, think you might be in danger?”
“Like I said, he blames me for my mom’s death. Says it’s because of me he lost her. It should’ve been me who died that day. He wants me dead.”
***
Torie watched as Keith absorbed all she was throwing at him. Even a guy as tough as Keith would have a hard time digesting her story. Sheesh. It was her story and she still had trouble believing it herself. At times, that portion of her life felt like a dream. At other times, the more vivid memories were a nightmare.
Keith’s jaw twitched. His hands were on her legs, holding on as if he couldn’t let her go. Oh, how she wished that were true. After all she’d just laid on him, she wouldn’t be surprised if he hightailed it and ran without a single glance back.
Steeling herself for his reply, she tucked her heart in tight and waited for the blow. Instead, he lifted her chin, a tender gesture for such a force of a man. “Look at me, Dragonfly.”
She did. And got lost in a sea of blue full of concern and…love? Her heart didn’t dare think it, let alone believe it. Someone like Keith could never love someone like her.
“I’m so sorry. Sorry you’ve carried all this pain alone for so long. Sorry for what that bastard of a father did to you.” He shook his head and took a deep breath. “But I will do everything in my power to keep you safe. From this moment on, anyone who even thinks about trying to hurt you is going to have to go through me.”
He cupped her face and drew her to him. He placed the softest of kisses on her lips, then moved to her cheeks and then her eyes, ending with a tender brush of his lips on her forehead.
Oh yes. Cherished is how this man made her feel.
Her face still in his hands, he placed his forehead to hers and closed his eyes. Between a slow deep breath and the slight tremor she felt moving through him, she sensed him fighting for control. She understood it all too well. Many times she lay in bed at night, unable to sleep, thinking only of what it would be like to rid the world of her dad. But never had she experienced someone wanting to do so in her defense.
Keith wasn’t the kind of man who’d go looking for trouble. However, he’d defend to the death anyone he cared about. She’d seen that first hand when Aimee had been in trouble. And he cared for Torie enough to do the same.
With each word Torie had spoken to Keith, the burden of all the years of holding it all in, carrying it all herself, fell from her shoulders. He hadn’t turned away from her, but rather said he would gladly step in front of her, protect her. Be there for her. Whether he actually loved her or not, she had no clue. But this… What this man offered her now, was enough. More than enough.
She pulled back and held both his hands in hers. “Thank you. Thank you for listening and for not…” She turned towards the fireplace, unable to look him in the eye.
He gently brought her face back square with his. “For not what?”
She blinked, willing away more tears. “Not walking away from me.”
His brow furrowed and he pulled her into his lap again. Oh, how that was quickly becoming a favorite spot of hers. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She tucked into his chest, accepting his warmth.
“Now, why would I go and do a stupid thing like that?”
Unable to help it, she laughed. This man truly had no idea how amazing he was. How unique.
One of his arms wrapped around her waist. He lifted the other and unclipped her hair. He placed the clip beside them on the couch and stroked her hair. His lips settled against the top of her head and stayed there.
“I love the smell of your hair.” His voice was muffled as he nuzzled close to her ear, sending shivers all over her body. “Like fresh lemons in the summer.”
She smiled and placed a soft kiss on his neck. A low growl rumbled in his chest.
“You’re gonna drive me crazy, woman.”
She looked up into his eyes and laughed. “Sorry. Well, not really.”
He laughed as well, but then his demeanor became serious again. “I want to make sure you hear me, Torie. I don’t ever say anything I don’t mean.”
There was not a doubt in her mind that was the truth. Keith thought before he spoke. Always. This man was self-control personified. It was unlike anything she’d ever seen before, really.
“I won’t ever turn away from you. And I will do everything in my power to protect you.”
“Even though I’m…” She buried her head in his chest once more.
He rubbed her back. “Even though you’re what? Beautiful inside and out? Willing to let me be quiet and broody without giving me grief?”
She wanted to smile but couldn’t. “No. Because I’m not…perfect. My dad, he took from me…” The tears started again and man, if that didn’t piss her off. She was done with tears. Done shedding them over her dad.
Keith held her tight and stroked her hair again. “I understand all your dad took from you, Dragonfly. And believe me when I say I’d like to explain to the man myself all the wrong there is in his choices. But God makes you whole again. I promise you that. And as far as perfect? Who is? We’re all a mess. Just trying to do our best while praying God can use the broken pieces in some way.”
“How could God ever forgive all I’ve done? I haven’t exactly made the best choices with my life.”
“Oh, sweet woman. He can. I’m living proof of that.”
She looked up at him. “What do you mean?”
He looked straight towards the fireplace and didn’t answer. Not right away. She leaned against his chest again, content to just be. Be held. Held by this man who cared so much for her.
When he did answer her, his chest rumbled beneath her cheek, his voice sad. “I think we’ve had enough stories for one day. Maybe someday soon, I’ll tell you mine.” He kissed the top of her head. “For now, I wanna focus on you.”
No one had ever taken so much interest in her. The real her. She liked the sound of that. She took a deep breath and relaxed completely in Keith’s arms. Yes. This was most definitely her favorite place to be.
***
Keith could tell the moment Torie drifted off the sleep. Her breathing became even and her body melted against his, all tension gone. However, he was wound up tighter than a drum. Between his attraction to the beautiful woman now asleep in his arms and the rage he battled to control over hearing what her dad did to her, he was a mess.
He played her story over and over again in his mind. Un-friggin’ believable. Keith was a soldier. Marine Corps Force Recon. And yet what Torie had just laid on him could rank up there with some of the worst crap he’d ever seen or heard of in his time of service.
Where was her brother? She said he took off, but was she afraid he would come after her in some way too? Maybe not. He couldn’t take the heat of their home life so he bailed. Unlikely he’d have any desire to hurt Torie. But if he knew where Torie was, would he help her dad find her?
Questions swirled in his head, making him want to get up immediately and build a wall around the property eight miles high and three miles thick. Now he understood Torie’s need to construct walls around herself, emotionally and otherwise. She couldn’t trust a damn soul.
He looked down at her, sleeping like a child in his arms. No, not a child. A full grown, gorgeous woman who trusted him enough to share her entire story, even though she feared he’d walk away from her after having heard it.
He laid his head against the back of the sofa and settled deeper into the cushions. He’d stay here all day and all night if it meant she got decent sleep and felt safe. Who cared if his arms lost feeling? As long as they were wrapped around her, he was content.
When he mentioned he was living proof that God can make someone whole, she’d asked what he meant. And man, did everything in him want to spill his guts. Share his demons too. But the day was already heavy ladened enough with crap from her past, he didn’t need to add his to the mix as well.
Part of that was true and yet part of him had to admit he was also afraid. She’d laid it all on the line with him, risking his rejection. Was he brave enough to do the same? Trust her with his heart as she’d trusted him?
He placed a whisper of a kiss on her forehead and prayed. Prayed he had the courage to tell her all of his past mistakes. And prayed she could see beyond them to maybe give them a chance together.
He had Torie in his arms. And although he tried to fight it, she’d made her way into his heart as well. He just hoped she’d let him into hers as well.