83. Not Watching Anymore

Hatred doesn’t forget. The longer it waits, the more it grows like some grotesque fungus.

I learn this the hard way one April day.

The end of school is not too far away, and summer is within reach. The sun is drying out the winter’s harsh bite and making things seem halfway normal.

But on the day of our track team’s big meet versus Hendersonville, I’m faced with the reminder that anger isn’t a good thing to store up. Like perishable food in a pantry, it’s going to go bad fast.

It’s the end of art class, and somehow the hippie teacher Mr. Chestle has disappeared before the bell rings for us to leave. Students file out, and I’m chatting like always with Kelsey when I see her stop in midsentence.

“I was just kidding,” I say, not really sure what I said that got to her.

Kelsey shakes her head, glancing toward the door.

I turn to look and see Gus coming in. And behind him, the rest of his crew.

The rest of the kids in the room quickly decide it’s smart to leave.

Gus walks over to us. Kelsey’s yellow painting that she’s worked on for over a month is in front of her.

“Isn’t that pretty?” Gus says, looking at me.

“What do you want?”

He only smiles, then looks back at the door. Riley closes it.

“We haven’t had a chance to talk lately,” he says.

“Cut it out, Gus. We have classes to go to.”

“What’s your name again?” he asks Kelsey.

I stand between the two of them as he sneers like a bull spotting red.

“I never did get that apology I’ve been waiting on since you attacked me in the hallway,” Gus says.

I look at the pockets of pimples on his face, the way his hair sticks up like a Chia Pet, the big forehead that needs a nice rag to sop it up.

“Why don’t you go,” I say to Kelsey behind me.

“Uh-uh. She’s staying here. You—Miss Braces and Glasses. This your painting?”

“Get out of my face, Gus.”

“Or what?” he asks me. “What are you going to do?”

He laughs as he takes a knife out of his pocket and opens it. Then he sticks the canvas of the yellow painting and cuts several slits through it.

I start to yell and go toward him, but Kelsey grabs me by the shoulder to tell me to stop. Meanwhile, Riley and Burt come to flank Gus while Oli remains at the door.

“Put that away,” I tell him.

“Or what? What are you going to do?”

“Kelsey, leave.”

“Kelsey, huh? Nice little pretty girl. So different from your last one, huh?”

“Shut your fat face.”

“Chris—”

I glance back at Kelsey and see her almost in tears. “Gus, I’m serious. Let her go.”

“I’m not a monster,” he says. “But I can do monstrous things.”

“Gus.”

“I want an apology.”

He’s still holding the knife by his side. I honestly have no idea if he’ll use it.

“I’m sorry, okay?”

“Not good enough. Not sincere enough.”

I see the gaping hole of the shredded painting Kelsey spent so much time on.

See I told you I’m no good for you. People around me only get hurt.

“Gus, I’m sorry. Now leave us alone.”

“Uh-uh. Oli, guard the door.”

Gus smiles. Riley and Burt chuckle.

“Maybe you’d learn if something happened to little Miss Virgin here.”

I look around me. I never bring anything to art, so there’s nothing to pick up and defend myself with or even to throw at him except some art tools.

“You’d learn then, wouldn’t you?”

I move my arm to shield Kelsey as I try to think through what I can do and how I can protect the girl behind me.

Then something weird happens. Something not part of the suggested plot.

Oli is standing by the door and peers through the tiny slit of glass as if to check and see if the coast is clear. Then he jogs to the side of the room and picks up a large palette knife that looks like an elongated spatula.

I’m wondering what he’s—

“Owwwww!”

I guess that’s my answer.

The blunt tool makes a loud slap against the back of Gus’s big head.

It’d be hilarious if I weren’t so freaked out about the knife and the girl behind me.

Gus puts one hand on the back of his head as he grimaces. But Oli doesn’t stop there. He flails down with the flat instrument and whacks Gus’s hand. I hear what must be the knife drop on the floor.

Oli speaks. And this time he’s not whispering to me in the locker room. “No, Riley, you stay over there.”

Meanwhile, Gus is yelling and cursing.

“Shut up and get up,” Oli says. He’s holding the palette knife like it’s an actual knife. But there’s probably no one in the room who doesn’t think he’ll use it.

“What are you doing, you idiot?” Gus says. He’s still rubbing the back of his head.

“No more. Chris, you guys can leave.”

“Kelsey, leave.”

“Chris—?”

“I’ll be just a minute.”

She gets her stuff and quickly leaves the room. I’m standing there watching the scene play out.

“Oli. Are you high?” Gus stares at him in disbelief.

“Not this time,” Oli says.

Gus curses at him some more.

“I’m tired of watching you hurt people that don’t need hurting, and I’m not going to watch anymore. This time I’m not going home feeling guilty that I should’ve done something.”

“You put that thing down—”

“Or what? Huh? No more.”

“That’s right, it’s no more. I’m done with you.”

Oli nods as if that’s fine with him. “You can leave, Chris.”

“Okay,” I say. “But after you.”

He drops the tool on the floor. “You try and do anything to me, Gus, and I’ll kill you,” he says.

“Not if I do it first.”

It doesn’t look like either of them is joking around. Oli leaves, and I follow him into the hallway.