44. Head Over Heels

It’s obvious how I feel.

I put it out there, and Kelsey knows.

But Monday morning arrives and I don’t see her and don’t end up seeing her until lunchtime where she’s with Georgia and doesn’t say much.

As we eat lunch, not really saying anything, I wonder if she told Georgia anything.

Next time I see her, she’s with Georgia again.

Next time she’s with another girl.

Then she’s heading home, and I tell her to call me tonight.

But she doesn’t.

And despite everything going on I suddenly start thinking about her and second-guessing myself and wondering if she’s angry or if she now thinks I’m a jerk, and the questions keep coming.

Another day doesn’t change anything.

Neither does another.

I text her asking if everything is okay and she texts back saying everything is fine, but something’s wrong.

Near the end of the week I know that something is very wrong, so I finally manage to get her alone by her locker.

“Are you still angry at me?” I ask.

She looks embarrassed to talk about this. Her face is red, and her eyes don’t meet mine.

“Kelsey—I’m sorry—I really—I messed up big time. Okay?”

“No. It’s not you.”

“Then what?”

“I don’t know.”

She looks around, and I move my head to try and get her attention.

“Kelsey, what’s wrong?”

She still won’t look me in the eye.

“Please—just say something.”

But then Georgia shows up and I realize that this isn’t just accidental. It’s a girl conspiracy.

“Can we get a minute?” I ask Georgia.

“It’s fine,” Kelsey tells me.

I look at her.

This time she looks at me, as if having Georgia around gives her a little more strength and courage.

I’m sorry and I’ve told you half a dozen times and you wanted it as much as I did so what did I do wrong?

I nod and walk away.