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William glanced at Emma, who straightened her gown and checked her reflection in the large mirror on the wall. The moonlight that seeped through the window allowed adequate lighting to provide Emma the ability to ensure her hair, face, and the dress were perfectly in place after their passionate moments of intimacy.
It had been utterly unplanned, but William was perfectly content that it had been the right choice. Most of his spontaneous activities were the ones he treasured most.
As he straightened his own attire, confirming there was not a thread out of place, he gazed at Emma, who was obsessing over whether anyone would notice she had been up to something that she should not have been. According to others, of course.
“Emma, you look perfect,” William said and she whirled around, glancing at him with a furrowed brow.
“I beg your pardon?”
Knowing he had most probably overstepped his boundaries, he cleared his throat. “You appear as perfect now as when you entered.”
A smile formed on Emma’s lips as she slowly approached him and took his hands. “I do not wish to dredge things up unnecessarily, but what we did, once again—what does it mean?”
Dredge things up? Last time she had refused to talk about it at all.
Hopefully this time they would be able to come to some sort of agreement or understanding.
“Perhaps we should discuss this elsewhere?” William suggested as Emma placed her hands on his chest.
“Are you simply too afraid to define our relationship?” Emma murmured and raised an intrigued brow at William.
“That is ludicrous,” he whispered, tilting his chin downward. “I promise you that we will discuss this soon, when things are safer for both of us.”
Their noses touched briefly as he gently caressed Emma’s cheek. Their lips edged closer to one another and suddenly the door of the room opened.
They jolted apart in shock. The young woman, whom William instantly recognized as Lady Clara, the daughter of the Duke and Duchess of Waltham, was well known as a gossiping young woman.
“My lady,” William said, injecting confidence into his tone as he approached Lady Clara.
“Apologies for the intrusion, my lord,” Lady Clara answered with a smile as she gazed at William. That smile faded as her gaze came to rest on Emma. “My lady. I was under the impression all the guests were in the ballroom.”
“Emma and I were simply...” His voice trailed off as he was suddenly lost, unable to find the words to explain.
“Lord William and I were discussing how beautiful the moon is this evening. The ballroom is far too warm and crowded for my liking, and he was courteous enough to escort me before I could lose myself in these maze-like hallways,” Emma interjected calmly and motioned to the moon that shone through the window.
“It would seem it was warm in here, also,” Lady Clara answered, with a raised brow.
“If you would excuse us both, my lady. Lady Emma and I must be heading back to the ballroom,” William politely requested and ushered Emma out the door under the icy gaze of Lady Clara.
They quietly made their way back to the ballroom, parting ways as they reached the entrance, so as not to raise any suspicions.
Time passed, and William kept an eye on Emma.
Then Lady Clara walked back in and began to circulate the room.
Things changed. For the worse.
William stood next to Carson and noticed quite a few women staring at him, as well as pointing and whispering in Emma’s direction.
Dread slithered up his spine.
If only there was something he could do. Instead of confronting those women, he chose to leave it be. He did not wish to create a scene in the presence of all these guests and humiliate Emma. He would simply keep an eye on her for the remainder of the evening, ensuring that no one bothered her.
*
MUCH LATER IN THAT night, he saw a few ladies approach Emma, and for a moment he held his breath. He wondered what their words were, and as he decided to step in and take responsibility for what he had done, he noticed Emma speak casually and comfortably, as though she were unfazed by their words.
William watched her converse briefly with the women, and by the looks on their outraged faces, they were shocked and disgusted by what she had said.
After they turned away from Emma, he expected them to glare at him, as she could have easily stated that he had attacked her.
The women however, took no notice of him at all, and walked past him without giving him a second glance.
He heard them speak quietly amongst themselves.
“What an utter disgrace. I never in my life thought the daughter of an earl would behave so beyond the pale,” one lady said.
“At least William is handsome and charming,” another lady pointed out, and winked as she passed.
His jaw clenched and he lowered his gaze. Certainly, this was not good. Her reputation was ruined, and any chance of her finding a husband would now be destroyed. Guilt rose inside him, and he glanced sympathetically at Emma.
He had not meant for things to come undone in such a manner, but he did not regret any of his actions. Perhaps he and Emma should have been more careful in choosing a place to be intimate. Or perhaps waited until they were at Woodlock Manor. But what was done, was done, and they had to face the repercussions of their actions.
Emma would have to face them the most.
Not a soul glanced disapprovingly at him. In fact, they paid him no notice, but the glares and stares that were directed at Emma were troubling and unsettling. He fought the urge to approach those people and take responsibility, although it was rather difficult to do so.
William also tried to catch Emma’s attention from the other side of the ballroom, but it was as if she had purposely tried to avoid him.
And rightfully so.
During the journey back to Woodlock Manor, William glanced out the window, absentmindedly listening to Lizzie beam and chatter about the proceedings of her evening, not once mentioning Carson.
He would most certainly not inform Elizabeth of Mr. Wallace’s feelings for her. It was not his place to do so. In actual fact, William had too much on his mind to even consider speaking to his sister regarding his friend.
“Brother, are you even listening to me?” Elizabeth asked suddenly and he glanced over at her.
“Not in the least, sister. I do apologize,” William admitted.
“While I do appreciate your candor—”
“I have many important matters with which to concern myself other than your evening dancing with dukes and lords, sister.”
“You are mean,” Elizabeth muttered and crossed her arms. “I had a lovely evening. How was yours?”
“It was fine. You are aware I do enjoy these balls as much as the next person,” William lied.
“If I may ask, where did you disappear to? One moment you were conversing with Mr. Wallace and the next moment, you were missing,” she inquired, her eyes sparkling with intrigue.
“The glimmer in your eye suggests you are already aware of my whereabouts, and you are merely asking to hear if my tale corroborates with the one you heard,” William muttered and glanced out of the window once again. “Tell me this—what was it that you heard?”
“You and Emma were caught in the duke’s parlor, presumably in an intimate moment. Her dress was disheveled and your trousers undone.”
William scoffed in disgust. He could not believe the tales that would soon circulate the entire county. “That is utterly ludicrous. Why on earth would I engage in an intimate moment with Emma, and have undone trousers?”
“Precisely. Although you do have rakish tendencies. No offense, brother,” Elizabeth stated with a cringe.
“No offense taken,” he grumbled.
“I am well aware of how much the young lady frustrates you. Although you have been civil to her for the sake of James and Kitty, you would most certainly not do such a thing. Emma would not allow it either. She would toss you from the balcony, not be intimate with you. At a ball, of all places.”
William’s jaw clenched as Lizzie proceeded to emphasize how much Emma despised him, much to his dismay and frustration, but he remained quiet. The guilt, however, had begun to bubble up inside him, and he feared that soon enough he would admit to her that it had been indeed the truth.
“Of course, I did not believe those tales, as Lady Clara—”
“She was the one who told you?” William interjected.
“Indeed,” she answered. “But all of Somerset is aware of how tall Lady Clara tends to weave a tale, which was why I did not believe her and told her to stop being irresponsible with her tongue.”
“Thank you for that, sister,” William said gratefully, “but I must confess. The root of the tale is true.”
“I beg your pardon?” Lizzie exclaimed.
“Emma and I were in the duke’s parlor, alone, when Lady Clara walked in. She seems to be under the impression that something had happened between us, but...”
“Nothing had. Brother, there is no need to feel guilty, as I see it in your face. You did nothing wrong, and neither you nor Emma must feel worried. You both know the truth of what happened.”
“But her reputation will be ruined because of a lie.”
A lie I just told, William admitted to himself.
“Brother, do not fret. I will ensure that nothing happens to Emma, nor her reputation. I vow this to you.”
William nodded gratefully and sat back against the velvet cushion of the coach, clenching his fingers into fists.
He was well aware that his sister did not have enough influence or power to stand by her vow, but he trusted her beyond a reasonable doubt.
After arriving at Woodlock Manor, he made his way to his chambers and stayed there for a short while. He paced around until finally, he could no longer take the agony and left.
He made his way to Emma’s bedchamber and knocked softly on the door. He heard shuffling inside but remained quiet. The door slowly opened and Emma stood in the doorway, dressed in a soft white night shift, her long red hair hanging loosely down her shoulders.
“My lord,” Emma whispered with a furrowed brow.
“May I speak with you for a moment?”
Emma sighed. “Do you think this is a good time?”
“As good a time as any. I must speak with you. Please,” he practically begged.
Emma pursed her lips for a moment and nodded. “Very well, but quickly.”
“Of course,” William whispered and entered her bedchamber.
Emma closed the door and turned to him. Her eyes were red, and there were tear-stains present on her cheeks as the light of the candle by her bedside illuminated her face.
“You’ve been crying,” he said as he approached her, but she fobbed him off.
“No matter. Why do you wish to speak to me at this hour, my lord?” Emma asked and crossed her arms.
“Lizzie informed me of the rumors that have already begun to circulate about the two of us,” he answered.
“No, those rumors are about me. They do not include you, and even if they had, it would not matter. When men do scandalous things, they are not gossiped about or torn to shreds by the very people whom they had considered friends. Your reputation was not harmed in the process. Mine was, and will be for a long while,” Emma answered, her tone bitter.
He hated seeing her like this. It was beyond the pale.
“Allow me to right this injustice.”
“I would rather not, William. It happened, and now I must take responsibility for my actions.”
“Our actions.”
He was not a fool. It took two, and he would not allow her to take the fall for a decision they made together.
Emma smiled, though it looked strained, and shook her head. “This is what I meant when I told you it is difficult enough being a woman, without being involved in a scandal. We are persecuted and called out as being promiscuous even if it is not true. But this is my burden to bear.”
“Emma, you could have easily told people that I had forced you into that position,” he offered. “You still can.”
“But it is not true,” she said simply and William’s chest tightened.
What man did he know who had this sort of integrity?
Truth above all else.
He couldn’t stand by and let her sacrifice herself. “It does not matter. I am willing to do that for you.”
Emma sighed. “While I admire your noble heart, I cannot allow you to lie and tarnish your reputation for the sake of saving mine. I cannot allow that. William... you mean too much to me.”
A lump formed in his throat and he swallowed hard. “Emma—”
“Please, leave me be for the night. I am tired,” she said, glancing at the carpet beneath their feet and opening the door for him.
He straightened his spine and nodded morosely.
What else could he do but respect her request?
He’d made enough of a mess for one night.
He bowed to Emma and quietly left her bedchamber, consumed by guilt. He’d now irreparably hurt the only woman he had ever truly cared for.