25

‘Is she still here?’ I asked Pratyush as I reached his place and he opened the door. He was fully dressed this time.

‘Please let us live in peace now. She doesn’t love you anymore,’ he said, a little enraged. He was slapped.

‘Speak as much as I ask you to,’ I hissed, pulling the revolver out of my pants. ‘Is she still here?’

‘Where can she go at this time?’ He looked scared to death, eyes fixed on the gun, as if he was going to pee his pants. ‘I will drop her home in the morning. I p-p-promise,’ he slurred.

‘Call her out.’

‘Tara . . .’ he yelled at the bedroom and cowered in a corner. ‘You got to calm down, Kunal. You are taking it too far,’ he squeaked, eyeing the main door of the flat.

‘I have no grudges against you. You can go.’ I moved aside to give him some space to run.

That coward asshole did not even take five seconds to run out of the flat.

I walked to the bedroom door as Tara stepped out. She was shaken to see me again. ‘Pratyush . . .’ she mumbled.

‘He’s gone,’ I laughed humourlessly.

Her eyes widened in fear as she saw the gun in my hand. ‘You are sick,’ she said in a trembling voice and took a step back, inside the bedroom.

‘Am I?’ I walked in and closed the door.

‘What are you up to?’ she screamed.

‘The first man you cheated me for—that Ronit—he clicked your nudes and blackmailed you,’ I said as I dragged a plastic chair against the door and sat on it. Tara stood as far from me as possible. She was horrified and was trying to find an escape. There was none. ‘And the second one left you alone in danger and ran away saving his own ass.’ I took a cigarette out of the packet that I had purchased on the way to Pratyush’s flat. Lighting it, I spoke again, ‘Don’t you get better men to cheat me with?’

‘I am sorry. I will do as you say,’ she cried.

‘Tara, Tara, Tara . . .’ I breathed. ‘Itna chutiya to aaj tak kisi ne nahi banaya mujhe.’

She leaned against the wall opposite to me, frozen like a statue.

‘You want to go? I will let you go. Just give me a satisfying answer,’ I spoke grimly. ‘Why?’

She stayed mute.

‘I mean . . . forget the love and all that crap. But didn’t you have the humanity to consider the fact that you cheated me once—and I still loved you? Didn’t you have the humanity to consider the fact that I loved you so much that I have your name on my arm with a permanent tattoo? Didn’t you have the humanity to consider the fact that I took you to my parents?’

‘I am sorry. I just . . . I just didn’t feel it for you for the last few days,’ she finally replied.

‘Alright. Agreed. It happens. Not twice—but it happens. But then, you could have told me. I loved you so much that I would have allowed you to go.’ I paused for a drag. ‘But why you had to jump in bed with someone else when we were still into a relationship?’ I shouted as I stood up. The chair toppled behind and Tara shrieked with fear.

‘I am sorry. Please let me go.’

‘Do you remember what you said that day at Bistro Beach when I asked you—what if you cheat me again?’ I felt the cold revolver in my hand. I was burning with anger, but somehow, I managed to appear calm. Perhaps, because I knew we would be dead in a couple of minutes. Tara and I—both.

‘Please let me go, Kunal,’ she begged between her heavy sobs.

‘You said, “if I ever do—you can kill me then and there,”’ I reminded her. ‘But don’t worry, Tara. You are not dying alone. You would be punished for cheating me. And I would be punished for letting you do it—the second fucking time.’

My hands trembled as I pointed the muzzle of the gun at her.

As I looked into her eyes for the last time, the memory of the first time I saw her came crashing down on me. It was the first day of the new session at school, and just like previous years, I was in the last bench, talking to Hari, when I happened to glance at the door. That was the moment when a chubby girl with curly hair, having a ring in her nose, walked in. She looked too young to be in standard ninth and was nervously eyeing her new classmates. I had no idea why, but this girl had all my attention in an instant. She intrigued me. I kept my hand on Hari’s mouth to make him quiet and kept on staring at her, for long, until our eyes met and she passed a short, friendly smile at me.

In that moment, however, I never thought that years later I will be standing in front of her—holding a gun in my hand—ready to kill her.

Time. It’s a whore.

‘Don’t do it. Please. I don’t want to die,’ her voice brought me back to the present.

‘No one ever wants to die, Tara—just like no one ever wants to be betrayed. But you see, at times we are left with no choice.’ I passed a sadistic smile and placed my finger on the trigger. ‘I loved you, Tara. I loved you beyond all limits.’ A tear dropped off my eye and I prepared myself to pull the trigger.