6. Lessons on Readiness
The rule of combat is not to count on opponents not coming, but to have ways to deal with them when they do; don’t think they will not attack, but develop what cannot be attacked when they do.
Sun-Tzu
THE THREE MOST IMPORTANT ELEMENTS in the strategic plan of champions are preparation, preparation, and... preparation. If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail. Top-notch champions are thorough, probing, and comprehensive as they ready themselves for the inevitability of attack. No stone is left unturned to build body-mind-spirit preparation. They practice their strengths and strengthen their weaknesses. In The Art of War, Sun-Tzu looks upon this as the business of calculation for future victory. In preparing for future confrontation, Sun-Tzu advises that you avoid being too willing to lose, too eager to win, too emotionally involved, and too sentimental; otherwise, you will be too vulnerable and in danger of defeat. Being ready means placing yourself in position to quickly respond, to be flexible, and to adapt to any and all eventualities. The athlete or team that is so prepared will enjoy the fruits of their work. The great champions do this well. The following are some examples of how champion athletes strategically position themselves and prepare for success.
GOING WELL, NEEDS WORK
READINESS , the delicate art of being prepared, is an ongoing process of learning from setbacks while using your strengths as springboards for future success. Once an event, game, or contest is history, it’s time to move forward and prepare for the next encounter. How well you move forward is strongly influenced by your evaluation style, your critique of a practice session or performance in a game. Most athletes tend to begin with the dark, gray cloud: What’s wrong, and why am I (are we) falling short of my (our) expectations? I usually joke with an athlete by saying: If you lower your expectations (see “Expect Nothing”), you will no longer have this problem... but no need to do that.
The key to using past experience for future success is to ask yourself or your team some well-directed questions. It’s crucial to begin this evaluation process on a positive note. First, ask yourself or the team: “What’s going well?” This precludes any chance for defensiveness, either from you or the team, and sends the message that you (we) are on track. Positive observations are always available and, when discussed, will boost confidence and self-esteem. Such a beginning helps to keep the heart open for a discussion on any changes to be made. For the next question, avoid asking “What went wrong?” as this forces you to focus on the negative behaviors or actions. Rather, the question “What needs work?” is a proactive, forward-moving question of growth and improvement, helping and guiding you to a place of readiness. Notice the difference between the responses to each question:
A. What went wrong? We didn’t make our foul shots.
B. What needs work? We need to practice pre-shot routines, as well as taking fifty foul shots per day.
The first question leads to moaning, complaining, and a focus on what’s not being done. It’s a reminder of how much we lack. The second question acknowledges that something positive needs to be done to “kick it up a notch.” Following “What went well?” it is easier to take on the challenge of “What needs work?” This is simply the journey of a champion in a nutshell: Notice what works well and improve what can be improved. The latter will keep you going forward in a strong, focused, and deliberate way. Use these two questions in your business on a regular basis, as a way to check in and evaluate the performance of yourself and others. It is a non-threatening exercise that keeps the ambiance upbeat and open to growth. I use this with my kids at home with regard to their schoolwork or athletic performances. They tend to listen, which is a slight miracle in itself. For myself, at the conclusion of any clinic, workshop, or talk, I find these questions to be a constant source of well-being, validation, and potential growth or change.
EXPECT NOTHING
IN THE WORDS of an ancient samurai warrior: “Expect nothing yet be prepared for anything.” Expectations, as we know them, can be our strongest opponent, a nemesis for readiness. They are a setup for anxiety, pressure, and stress. Failure to achieve them can be discouraging if not devastating. Remember reading in an earlier section about letting go of what you can’t control? Expectations are uncontrollable entities that distract you from the champion’s process of focusing on the execution of a well-thought-out plan.
An integral part of any preparation process is to follow the advice of the samurai warrior. Prepare for the possibility of anything happening, and let go of expecting outcomes and results. Having said that, if you have prepared thoroughly, done what’s needed to perform well, and feel you are in good shape, you can have the following expectations, and no more:
Expect to do your best, even it that doesn’t mean winning.
Expect to do well.
Expect to have it all come together.
Expect that something really good is about to take place.
Expect success, which is defined by your ability to demonstrate your present best level of performance on a consistent basis.
Expect to get to know yourself and become a better athlete and person.
Make your expectations consistent (congruent) with what you feel is realistic for you—not what the media or others expect.
You may feel strongly that you are going to win, and that’s good. However, to expect nothing less than victory is a setup for too much anxiety. Better to focus on how you will compete during the contest or event; expect to be courageous, fearless, happy, intense, patient, bold, daring, if you so choose, and let the outcome take care of itself.
Be aware that the media and other external influences can fill your mind with expectations. These potential sources of stress can create “stories” that do a disservice to your mind, forcing you to focus on the wrong expectation. This can build layer upon layer of anxiety and tension that distracts from your best performance. (Go back to the section “Writing My Own Story.”)
When you put aside expectations, you accept that you can’t control your future, only influence it. To help with this, focus on the direction in which your feet are pointed at each moment, and establish a strong preference instead of an expectation. A preference presupposes that you have less concern for the outcome, yet can still direct your efforts along the path of excellent performance. You keep yourself open to possibilities for greater expansion, rather than limit yourself with defined expectations. According to Taoist wisdom:
And finally, prepare yourself to be free of outcome expectations by attending to the following thoughts in a relaxed meditative state, a tool you have learned earlier in this book. Try to remember a time in your life when you felt relatively free of the expectations of others. You were the new guy on the block, a neophyte at sport, new on the job, or simply a child who was totally oblivious to the “shoulds” and “musts” of the world. Now, in your state of relaxation, recreate the feelings associated with those days when you were relaxed and free of pressure. Your performances reflected your love of and joy in the game or job. Transfer this feeling to your present situation, filled as it is with others’ expectations. Say to yourself, “I refuse to give others permission to control me with their expectations. I am doing what I prefer to do, to satisfy no one but myself. I enjoy the process and continue to focus on the joy I feel now.”Without expectation,
One will always perceive the subtlety;
And, with expectation,
One will always perceive the boundary.
INTEGRITY IS THE WAY
THERE IS REALLY ONLY ONE way for a champion to challenge an opponent, and that is with complete integrity. For purposes of this discussion, integrity is defined as the narrowing of any gap that may exist between who you say you are and what you, in fact, do. This is why Part I, “The Way of Self-Awareness,” is such a crucial beginning to your journey as a champion. When you take the time to discover your sense of self, you begin to feel your personal power.
The message from the Tao Te Ching is clear: Trust in the power within, and use it. Lao-Tzu believed that when we as athletes or people in all competitive arenas do not feel this power, we feel fear. Fear creates tension, anxiety, and stress, which limit performance. The Tao teaches you to become aware of your inner power, who you are, and to stay in touch with it and align your action with it, in order to create excellent performance. Knowing who you are puts you in the best position to act on such inner power. Champions do not compromise their talents, abilities, and sense of self, regardless of whom they play, what the score may be, or the situation they find themselves in at work or at home.
So many teams and athletes do compromise their integrity by knowing who they are but not acting accordingly, or by not really knowing who they are, and, unaware of their power, turning away from their true selves and selling themselves short because of intimidation and fear. They give other teams permission to make them feel inferior, undeserving, or less than they are, and they crumble in the process. Integrity is also compromised when you, as the superior team, find yourself ahead by twenty points, only to let the opponent in the door by not continuing to play with the same intensity. You give your opponent the message that you are not willing to demonstrate your greatness for the entire game, that you hope you can relax and not work. Once this happens, they lose respect for you. You can keep your integrity by teaching them how a great team refuses to play anything less than their best until the “fat lady sings” and the bus is warming up.
People often spoil their work at the point
of its completion,
With care at the end as well as the beginning,
No work will be spoiled.
You are only a champion when you exhibit your integrity throughout, regardless of the results. Whether you’re the favorite or the underdog, ahead or behind, you can stay in touch with your integrity by focusing not on the score or possible outcome but on your willingness to exhibit your skills, demonstrate your level of conditioning, and play each and every moment of play.
Remember that you are “good enough.” You deserve the best, so act as if this were true. Regardless of anyone else’s position, you have deep value, something to demonstrate, something to teach. You deserve the opportunity to display your level of ability when it is time. Always act as if you are a champion, and a champion you are.
One of my favorite exercises to do with athletes has evolved from this Tao wisdom. Prior to a huge game, I ask them to define who they are at this point in time. They will often say: “We are determined, courageous, relentless, brave, pesty, fearless, and tough national-class athletes.” Then I say: “List five specific behaviors that need to be demonstrated during the game in order to prove these words true about you, that you have integrity—the act of combining who you say you are with what you do.” This creates excitement, challenge, focus, confidence, and accountability because we now know what it is that we demand from each other. These words and subsequent behaviors become our guide and mantra for playing with integrity. In the middle of a contest, you can now hear “be brave,” and these words become a reference point to that spiritual space of being brave. You actually have specific actions you can take that demonstrate this virtue as you play.
As you can see once again, the code of the champion is based on the attainment of inner success. It is understood that you always want to win. You dream about it and can taste it. Yet, show up to play your best, and let the win take care of itself. The champion knows that once inner success is achieved, there is less need for external victory, because you feel good inside. With less need for external victory, there is less tension, anxiety, and pressure over having to win. And, with less anxiety and tension, it is easier for the relaxed champion to achieve external victory, the byproduct of the successful spiritual journey, the goal you actually strive for.
When you begin to adapt and develop in this way, you will notice an overall decrease in the pressure, tension, and anxiety that accompany all competitive situations. You should still feel the excitement, anticipation, and nervousness of the event, as these feelings will keep you on your toes. As a champion, show up knowing that your training and preparation for the game or event are as complete as they can be for now, and simply perform as you are. Don’t obsess about outcomes or results; set your body, mind, and spirit free to do what they do best, what you have trained to do. Free of judgment or criticism, let the mind and spirit dance with what the body already knows how to do from all the hours of practice. Enjoy the dance, the flow, the process, and the real reason why you play or participate in any event, just for the passion you have for this graceful sport or challenging work, the joy and the fun of it all. This is, again, what I call integrity, when you integrate who you are with what you do. If you say you are a champion and do the things champions do, you demonstrate high levels of integrity and will be assured of success.
Hold to your ethics and principles and do not for a moment consider compromising what you believe to be right. Acting with integrity is the key.
THE BEGINNER’S MIND
In his classic bestseller Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind, Shunryu Suzuki states: “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities; in the expert’s mind, there are few.” We are all in danger of being experts.
In preparation for what lies ahead, many of us develop preconceived biases and beliefs that could seriously impede our performance. Being the expert, you “know” that this or that cannot be done. Breaking the four-minute barrier in the mile run was considered impossible. Yet this limited belief was quickly shattered as champion Roger Bannister, keeping an open mind, did what the experts believed to be impossible.
To better prepare yourself and get ready for your performance, be like a champion and develop the beginner’s mind, one that is open, receptive, and nonjudgmental. Question all of your limiting beliefs. John Lilly, a psychologist researching dolphin behavior patterns, said that “beliefs are limits to be examined and transcended.” Right now, write out a list of your favorite limiting beliefs, such as “I can’t,” “It never could happen,” “I’m (we’re) not good enough,” and on and on. Begin to see the ways in which you act like an expert, with no basis for proof. Now, with a beginner’s mind, change these statements around (example: “I can....”), and then list ways that demonstrate possibility rather than improbability. A pertinent guiding question that will help you open yourself to such possibility is: If you freed yourself to play up to your capacity, what do you think would be possible?
Prior to any performance, I tell athletes that this could be their day for major breakthroughs. I ask them: “If you freed yourself to play up to capacity, what would that be like?” Then I ask: “What specifically needs to be done to make that come true?” Regardless of what happens, their nervous systems are aligned with openness and receptivity to their greatness. They begin to seek out ways to fulfill the dream. To think the opposite will discourage them and contribute to the demise of greatness.
I like the concept of “new beginnings,” which reinforces the Zen mind approach. For example, you are a golf athlete who hits a poor shot. As you approach the ball for the second shot, tell yourself that “here is a new beginning, a chance to start again and demonstrate how a champion, world-class golfer hits a ball.” In tennis, each point becomes a new beginning. In soccer, each possession is a new start. Each half in lacrosse is a new game. Come out after halftime and play as if the score is zero-zero, whether you are up or down. After each mistake, error, or failure, begin again. “New beginnings” becomes a theme throughout the entire match or game. Having this as a pre-game strategy is a relaxing way to begin the contest.
Another strategy that will help you to keep the beginner’s mind is to play with the question: “What is it like to compete against us or me? How might the opponent feel?” Viewing the competitive event from your opponents’ perspective will reinforce what you know about you, and help you to focus on your presence rather than to concentrate or obsess about what you may lack. You become ready to demonstrate who you are and see how others may have serious concerns about competing with you. Give them reasons to justify those concerns by performing with integrity.
The more of a beginner’s mind you can develop, the more you will play for the love of playing, like a little child in a sandbox, free of judgment, pressure, and the fear of failure. The more you are in this state of mind, the more you free yourself to play up to your capacity.
LESSONS AS AFFIRMATIONS
When I fail to prepare, I prepare to fail.
I am better prepared when I am flexible and adaptable.
My preparation tells me to expect nothing, be ready for anything.
Expect success!
Look for specific ways to align who I am with what I do.
I refuse to give others permission to make me feel inferior.
My beginner’s open mind prepares me for my personal best performance.
My preconceived biases close my mind to opportunities. I examine these and go beyond.
QUESTIONS ON THE QUEST:
Based on your preparation, what five positive things could you expect to happen during your performance? (No outcomes or results, please.)
What five specific things do you need to do to make these become true?
When you are at your best, what specific behaviors, actions, or attitudes contribute to it? What can you do to bring these to the event or situation?
Looking back to the past game, tournament, season, work situation, or family outing, what are you most proud of? What can be done to influence that in the future?