The aroma of bacon, eggs and pancakes was absent in Landon’s childhood home on Saturday morning. The only scent Landon sniffed was his shower gel. “Lord, get me through this day—physically and spiritually. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
Landon continued to pray after he dressed, and once he was ready, he picked up his Bible to fortify himself with scriptures until his St. Louis cartel arrived, minus Karyn and her daughter who hit the stores in downtown Boston.
His grandparents had arrived at the same time as Rossi and the others. After anointing everyone’s forehead with Holy oil, his father led a short prayer before sending them off with the old saying, Godspeed.
“So, which house are we hitting first?” Levi asked in the driver’s seat as he slipped on sunglasses.
Octavia gasped from her spot next to Landon in the backseat. “Brother Tolliver, that sounds callous, as if we’re going to drug houses or something.”
Rossi agreed while Landon kept his thoughts to himself. He had Octavia’s hand secured in his. It felt good to have an intimacy with a woman that wasn’t physical. Clearing his head, he focused on the task before him. His friends didn’t know it, but they were about to cross into dangerous territory. Landon had used these women and tossed them aside. His innocent children suffered…. He wasn’t going to rehash that.
I am no longer that man, Satan!
When Octavia covered his fist with her soft hand, he relaxed. “Brittani’s.” He sighed.
As they drove throughout the city, Landon wasn’t inclined to be their tour guide and point out all the historic landmarks of his beloved Beantown. As Levi followed the GPS, Landon’s heart pounded when the navigator said, “You have reached your destination.”
Landon closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening his door. He had been missing in action even before he left Boston. When he had contacted the mothers of his four children earlier in the week, he got mixed responses, which was a heads-up to brace for some drama. “Maybe you all should wait in the car—”
“No!” they said in unison.
“Okay,” he conceded.
“Although this is a private matter, from what you told me about Brittani, she may be civil in front of guests,” Rossi suggested.
Landon didn’t argue as they climbed the steps to her home. He felt like he was part of a team of Jehovah’s Witnesses about to knock on her door, but they were coming in Jesus’ name. When Brittani opened the door wearing a white midriff shirt and tight jeans, he was glad for their presence. Wasn’t this woman engaged? He frowned.
She peeped around him. “I thought you were coming alone.”
“I never said that.”
Twisting her lips, Brittani stepped back and half-heartedly allowed them entrance. Landon watched as Brittani eyed Octavia. “Have a seat in here.” She pointed to a room that was tidy, even with toys stacked in the corner. “I was about to change.”
Mmm-hmm, Landon thought. He paced the room, nervous to see his sons for the first time since their first birthday party, which Landon had received an invite to the day before. He took the blame that he hadn’t been more involved. Landon should have gone head to head with Brittani, but with everything else going on in the family—that he was to blame—he had picked his battles.
Would Benson and Bryan remember him? Landon stopped in his tracks. Why was the house so quiet? Were the twins even there? His nostrils flared until he caught glimpse of a small photo on an end table. As if he was a military drone locked on its target, Landon walked over to it and picked up the photo: his sons. He strained his mind, wondering if he would be able to tell them apart after all this time.
“They’re cute,” Octavia said, coming to his side while Rossi and Levi remained seated.
He grinned. “Thanks. Carbon copies of me as a boy.” Landon couldn’t deny they were his.
Brittani reappeared and indeed, she had changed into something more presentable—clothes that covered her chest and stomach, and pants that allowed her to breathe.
At the same time, keys jingled and the front door opened. A tall man walked into the room and looked at each guest before focusing on Landon. Brittani looped her arm through the man’s, identifying him as her fiancé Charles.
“Sorry, I’m late, babe.” Charles kissed her on the cheek. “I meant to get here before your guests.”
Landon shook Charles’s hand, introducing himself and the others. With the pleasantries out of the way, Landon asked, “Where are my sons?”
“The proud papa returns.” Brittani snorted, then humphed. “They’re taking a nap. Chill. You’ve waited this long, you can wait a while longer.”
“Landon, do you mind if you, Brittani and I speak in private?” Charles waited for Landon to agree before steering them across the hall into the kitchen. Her fiancé seemed like an okay guy. Landon hoped Brittani would appreciate him. “Knowing the boys, they won’t stay asleep long.” He chuckled.
Landon glanced over his shoulder. Rossi and Levi gave him encouraging nods. Octavia mouthed, “Praying,” and capped it with one of her brilliant smiles.
Once they were gathered around a rather large table, Landon silently prayed for guidance.
“I don’t think we should relive past regrets,” Charles got to the point before Landon could begin his spiel. “So let’s start from today. Landon, Brittani says you live in St. Louis now. As a man, I appreciate you stepping up to the plate…”
“Finally,” Brittani mumbled as she glanced around the room.
“I paid child support until I lost my job. I explained that to you,” Landon argued.
“Don’t worry about it, man.” Charles waved him off with a shrug. “Babe says you have other children. I imagine that’s a heavy burden, but I’m willing to lighten the load.”
Why did Landon have a feeling he wasn’t going to like it?
“I love Brittani, Benson and Bryan. They need a father in the home, twenty-four-seven. I want to be that man and give them my last name, which means you won’t have to pay child support as long as you agree not to interfere with our parenting…”
All of a sudden, Charles didn’t seem like such a nice guy as Brittani looked at the man with worshiping eyes.
“Now wait a minute. I don’t think you understand,” Landon said. “I’ve lost enough time with my sons. I want in their lives, not out.”
Whatever Brittani was about to say, Landon cut her off. “We can go to court to work out the arrangements, but I won’t give up my parental rights. I insist on having visitation rights to include a month with me every summer…” Landon really hadn’t thought this through, but since this was coming out of his mouth, he had to own up to it. “The judge can determine what I should pay for child support. I’m here to right the wrong in my relationship with my sons. As far as name changing, I will petition the court for my sons to keep my last name.”
“It’s a little too late for you to make demands…” Brittani smarted off.
Landon hoped Rossi, Levi and Octavia were praying, because he was doing everything in his power to reign in his temper. Brittani had nerve. When Landon informed her that he wasn’t marrying her, it was Brittani that had a list of demands that held the boys hostage from his family...and him.
“I think we all agree we want what’s best for the boys. I’ve been here for them; I stepped up to the plate when they needed guidance.” Charles patted his chest. We’re not ex-ing you out of the picture completely. If they want to seek after their biological father when they reach a certain age…”
“Ah, naw.” Landon didn’t recall raising his voice, but Rossi, Levi and Octavia appeared in the doorway with concerned looks etched on their faces.
“Perhaps we need a time out,” Rossi said, but didn’t wait for an answer as he joined them at the table. Charles and Brittani seemed respectful of Rossi’s position as they yielded the floor to his guidance.
As everyone calmed down and Levi and Octavia returned to the living room, Landon wondered if Brittani made the boys take a nap at the time she knew he was coming.
“Benson and Bryan are too young to travel to the South since you don’t plan to come back to Boston,” Brittani stated. “And what about her?” She pointed to Octavia. “I don’t want her mistreating my children.”
Slapping his palms against the table, Landon gritted his teeth. “The boys are almost three. They are too young to travel alone, so I would accompany them, and I hadn’t said I would never come back…” At least he hadn’t to her anyway. “Until that time, I’m willing to make trips throughout the year for weekend visits. As far as Octavia, this is not about her—yet.”
Octavia reappeared. “Brittani, none of us here are the enemy. Landon has changed, and I believe he’ll be a good dad.”
Brittani grunted. “I see what’s going on between you two. Old Landon’s got you believing he’s going to marry you, doesn’t he?” Brittani said with venom.
“Babe—” Charles gave her a side eye—let it go.” He rubbed her hand, which seemed to have a calming effect.
“Marriage?” Octavia blinked. “I believe Jeremiah 3:14 that God is married to the backsliders who return to Him,” Octavia said softly, then pointed at Charles as she said to Brittani, “You’re getting a second chance at love; give Landon a second chance with his sons, please…please.” Octavia disappeared to the living room as the house came alive with bumps, thumps and little feet running down the hall.
Nothing else mattered at the moment his sons appeared in the doorway. Landon’s heart soared at the sight. They looked from one adult to the other before going to Brittani and Charles’s laps. Landon hid his disappointment. What did he expect?
Landon could feel all eyes were on him as he coaxed his sons to him. Charles said nothing as one of the twin clung to Charles.
Bryan came to Landon out of curiosity and then Benson followed. Before long, the twins led Landon to the living room. When the boys raced to the toy box, Landon got on the floor and played with them. An hour or so later, when Landon announced he had to go, Bryan and Benson begged him to stay. Their pleas were bittersweet. He wanted to stay, but he had two little girls who needed to get to know their father, too.
At the door, Landon shook hands with Charles. “Brittani, you’ve done a good job with my sons,” he complimented and handed her an envelope containing a five-hundred-dollar money order. “This is all I have for them now. I’ll send more regularly until the judge decides what I can afford to pay. I’m sorry, again.” Next, he squatted so he was eye level with the boys. “Be good and I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
“Whew,” Landon and the others exhaled at the same time once they were back in the rental. “Thanks for being there,” he told them.
“Always,” Octavia whispered and squeezed his hand.
It seemed as if Landon had just regrouped when the GPS brought them to mother number two: Kim Rayford. Once again, the drama began on the porch at the front door where Kim refused entry to Landon’s guests.
“It’s okay, man, we’ll wait in the rental,” Rossi said as the trio walked back to the SUV.
Once inside, behind closed doors and without his friends to act as a buffer, Kim released four years of pent-up frustration as a single mother. “I should call the police and have you thrown in jail…” She started cursing, causing Cherie’s tiny voice to call out for her mother.
“Aren’t you going to get her?” Landon asked, growing concerned.
“You don’t tell me what to do!” She got up and disappeared down the hall. Landon began to pray that God would bring peace into the home. She returned, dragging with her the prettiest little girl. How long had it been since he had seen his second born? Longer than Landon shamefully cared to admit. “Kim, I’m sorry I upset you and hurt you. I’m working to get caught up on my unpaid child support…I would also like visitation rights.”
“I’ll think about it.”
Cherie watched him with curiosity as she clung to her mother’s side. Landon concluded that a couple of hours wouldn’t be enough time to break the ice to begin the bonding process. They needed more one-on-one time. He thought about the dolls Octavia had purchased for his daughters since he was clueless on what to buy, but he had left Cherie’s gift in the car. If he went outside to retrieve it, knowing Kim’s mood, she might not let him back in. “Can you show me your favorite toy?”
His daughter nodded, but didn’t move. Who said four-year olds were talkative? Cherie was the most reserved child he had met in a long time. With no assistance for any type of transition coming from Kim, Landon wished Octavia was there. She would know how to get his daughter to open up to him. He began to pray for help, but Cherie didn’t make a move toward him. Time was up sooner than Landon had wanted, but if he was going to see all of his children in one day, he had to go. Getting to his feet, Landon handed Kim an envelope with a two-hundred-fifty -dollar money order. Cherie stayed close to her side.
Humph. Kim looked inside. “You’ve got to be kiddin’ me. You give my baby crumbles with your fancy job.”
“I lost that job. I’ve been homeless, and now I’m working at Walgreens until I can get back on my feet.”
There was no lost love between him and the woman whose relationship was a couple of weeks of hot sex. Kim released a belly laugh that lingered until a tear dropped. “Walgreens?” She laughed until she sneered at him. “Next time, bring me cash!” Kim walked to the door and opened it. Taking the hint, Landon left. His foot had barely cleared the door when she slammed it.
When he climbed back into the SUV, he collapsed against the seat. “What a mess I’ve made.” Lord, I didn’t think it was going to be this hard! Dropping his head into his hands, Landon slumped over. He had never been so humiliated. Cursing had come easily before, now he had to bite his tongue.
“It’s going to be okay,” Octavia said softly, rubbing circles on his back. Her touch was soothing.
“We’ve been out here praying,” Rossi said. “Are you up for another visit, or should we wait until tomorrow?”
“Nope. I’ve waited long enough to see my children, and Alyssa is six, so my visit is long overdue.”
Half an hour later, Landon arrived at a small house in Hyde Park. He braced for another mental showdown, but he and his crew received a warm welcome. Although Reba Kee wasn’t a practicing Christian, she had no ill feelings. Her husband, Martin, had adopted Alyssa because Landon didn’t care enough to protest it, even after the DNA test proved him to be the father. Alyssa was sharp, appeared well cared for and happy. Landon couldn’t thank Martin enough for stepping up to the plate and being the man he wasn’t.
Reba and Martin had prepared snacks, and Alyssa was eagerly awaiting the arrival of the special guests. The atmosphere was light-hearted.
Landon thanked God for the reprieve. Martin led the men into their entertainment room. Although Landon appreciated the hospitality, he’d rather spend his time getting to know the girl he had rejected from the moment she was conceived.
“No hard feelings,” Martin said, opening a can of beer. “I got blessed. Reba and I met when she came to the office and applied for WIC. She was a damsel in distress, and I wanted to be the one to rescue her. I’m a happy man.” He grinned and reached out to Reba when she walked into the room with mini sandwiches. Alyssa trailed, assisting her mother as a hostess-in-training. He watched his daughter’s every movement.
Looking away, Landon bowed his head in shame. What kind of human being was he to force his firstborn to live on public assistance when he had the means to provide for her comfortably, even if he had no intention of marrying Reba?
Now, he had so little to offer Alyssa and the others, and it went beyond the money. He was thousands of miles away from them. Landon’s heart began to ache from cheating his children out of so much—his love and their cousins, uncle and grandparents whom they knew little about. At the moment, he hated himself for his past actions.
I have cast your sins in the depth of the sea, God whispered Micah 7:19.
That reassurance lifted Landon’s spirit. He was thankful that Reba and her husband had told Alyssa about him. He would be forever grateful.
He faced Martin and Reba. “As I explained over the phone, I have three other children—a set of twin boys and a younger daughter. I’m not asking for your pity, but your prayers as I try to right my wrongs. I don’t have much, but as I continue to bounce back, Alyssa will get more.” Landon gave him the envelope with the last three-hundred-dollar money order.
Martin waved him off. “Put it in a college trust fund. Never too soon to save.” He reached over Alyssa who had wedged a space between them, and patted Reba’s stomach and that’s when Landon noticed the bump.
“We’re having twins.” He beamed.
Landon’s mouth dropped, then he blinked. “Wow. What are the odds of Alyssa have twins on both sides? Congrats, man.” Landon shook hands with Martin.
“That means I’m going to have two twin brothers.” Alyssa beamed.
“Two sets of twins,” Martin corrected. “We don’t know if they’ll be boys or girls, or one of each.”
Where Cherie was quiet, Alyssa was a chatterbox as she talked about what she learned in school and about wanting a cat. Landon wanted to stay longer, but it had been a long day. It was time to head back to his parents’ house. He, Octavia, Rossi and Levi hadn’t broken their fast with a prayer yet before they ate, so they were starved. The snack Reba tempted set before them. Once everyone prayed, then they would celebrate with a feast at his parents’ house.
Back in the SUV, Landon was quiet as he processed the magnitude of his responsibility to four children. Should he move back to Boston? Landon had taken family for granted. His cousin Garrett came to mind. He realized he owed Garrett a call and a real apology, but not today.