MORNING BROKE AND Harper was still sacked out.
They were sticky with dried sweat and other things.
A shower was in order.
While Teagan waited for Harper to wake, he ordered breakfast for the room, and started the shower.
No time for a bath today.
They were nearing their last port on the cruise and Teagan still hadn’t done any souvenir shopping. He wanted to get J.T. something offensive and rude as a thank-you for sending him on this trip.
J.T. would love it; Hope, not so much.
A soft knock at the door alerted him to the room service delivery. He ushered in the man with the breakfast cart, tipped him and then sent him on his way.
Harper, smelling the bacon, opened her eyes blearily to stare uncomprehendingly at the tidy breakfast spread he’d put together.
She rubbed at her eyes and struggled to sit up, holding the sheet to her breasts. “What’s going on?” she asked, her voice cracking with residual sleep. “Are those...pancakes?”
“Yeah, I wasn’t sure what you liked but judging by your facial expression whenever you ate them, I didn’t order poached eggs.”
Harper smiled as if amused that he’d noticed and kicked her feet over the side of the bed, wrapping herself in the sheet. She cocked her head to listen. “Is the shower running?”
“Yes. Shower, then breakfast. I didn’t expect them to deliver it so soon,” he admitted a bit sheepishly. “But I thought we could use a little wash after last night.”
Her cheeks flushed but she nodded. She rose on unsteady feet, wincing a little, and he immediately worried he’d hurt her.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I’m fine. Just a little sore.”
While part of him was concerned for her, he also found Harper incredibly sexy for being able to handle him with minor consequences.
More evidence that they were meant for one another.
He heard the shower door opening and closing.
If she thought she was showering alone, she was wrong.
Teagan joined her, ignoring her small frown and grabbing the soap to lather over her body.
“What are you doing?” she asked. “You don’t take no for an answer do you?”
He chuckled. “Turn,” he instructed, and she grudgingly complied. He took his time rubbing the soap over her body and between her legs, cleaning her thoroughly. “How bad is your mom’s MS?” he asked.
“Pretty bad,” she answered, closing her eyes as Teagan rinsed her free of soap. “She’s bed-bound at this point. Doctors aren’t optimistic.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” he said. “There’s no treatment or alternative therapy available?”
“They’ve done it all. It’s just not working.”
Teagan nodded. “It sucks when there’s nothing more you can do to help a loved one,” he said. “Does your mother know what you do for a living?”
Harper’s frown returned and she gave him her back with a shrug. “We’ve never talked about it. Honestly, she has bigger issues, if you know what I mean, than worrying about how I make a dollar.”
“You might be surprised.”
She huffed an impatient breath and returned to face him. “Just stop it. You don’t need to play morality police or whatever role you think you’re stepping into. I don’t want or need your opinion on how I live my life.”
If spikes could’ve erupted from her skin and skewered him to the glass, he’d be dead.
Talk about a touchy subject.
But in his experience, people who lashed out or reacted poorly to a simple question were usually suffering their own guilt about the situation.
He also knew it wasn’t going to end well if he kept poking that sore spot.
“Sorry,” he said, lifting his hands in mock surrender. “I overstepped.”
“Yeah, you did.”
They finished up in silence and stepped out of the shower, wrapping themselves in big, fluffy robes but the tension in the room was palpable.
He knew Harper was about to throw him out so he wasn’t surprised when she did exactly that.
She gestured to the breakfast spread and the shower. “This was very nice but I’m going to have to ask you to go. This isn’t fun anymore. You’re making this situation unbearable and I’m over it. So if you could please just go to your own room, that would be great.”
Teagan chuckled with a shake of his head. There was no arguing with her right now. Harper was visibly agitated and he could sense tears weren’t far behind, even if her tone was clipped.
“Sure,” he said, dropping the robe and walking nude to scoop up his discarded clothes. He was trying to be understanding but his limits were being tested. Why was he chasing a woman who was determined to push him away? If he saw someone else doing what he was doing, he’d call them out as a special kind of stupid. But Harper did weird things to his ability to be rational. “Let me know when you want to pull your head out of your ass.”
“Just because I don’t want to be with you doesn’t mean—”
“Except you do want me. Dammit, Harper, do you think I’m an idiot? You want me as bad as I want you, but there’s something in your head that keeps telling you to run.”
She tried laughing but the sound was strained. “You don’t know me well enough to pass that kind of judgment.”
“It’s not judgment, it’s plain fact. I get it, you were hurt. Bad things happened. But shit, bad things happen to everyone. Are you going to punish everyone around you in the hopes of gaining some kind of satisfaction?”
Harper’s stony silence egged him on.
“Yeah, so run. Run like a little girl caught up in an adult’s game. Someday you’re going to wake up and realize you ran away from all the wrong things. Money sure as hell isn’t going to do much for the mountain-sized pile of regret waiting for you if you keep this up.”
“Sage advice,” she said, sounding bored. “Thank you, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Would you like to share any more clichéd bits of advice before you go?”
“Just this.” He jerked Harper to him and kissed her hard. The tiniest moan escaped her lips as he pushed her away. “Looks fade, honey, and then you’re left with what you have inside. And right now...you’ve got a whole lot of nothing. Good luck with that.”
Teagan slammed out of Harper’s room and bypassed his own, going straight to the workout facility. He needed to burn off some of this anger before he punched a wall.
He didn’t know which of them was more stupid—him for wanting her so bad he was willing to make a fool out of himself, or her, for denying herself the one thing that she wanted so badly.
Hell...they were both idiots.
* * *
ONCE TEAGAN WAS gone, Harper allowed the tears.
How dare he judge her without knowing the ins and outs of her life?
He didn’t know how it felt to watch his mother slowly lose all function, to basically become a human vegetable, kept alive by machines.
She was a survivor, dammit.
Not a victim, not a crybaby.
She’d been given a basket of lemons and she’d damn well made lemon margaritas out of them.
Did he think he could dazzle her with bullshit—all the romancy stuff like breakfast in bed, epic sex, fun times and laughter—when in fact, she knew those were the things that were an illusion?
Men were skilled at wooing a woman when they wanted to catch them.
But keeping up that level of intense courtship...impossible.
Which was why Harper was happy to move on when that happened.
No hard feelings. Just a fatter bank account.
Sure, there were nights when she wanted to cry herself to sleep.
Of course, there were days when she wanted to vomit at the knowledge she had to have sex with her “boyfriend,” but those inconvenient moments faded fast enough when she made her deposits.
Stuart was going to be the different one.
She wanted a nice man with a fat bank account who would treat her well enough that she could retire.
But Stuart wanted Vanessa.
So now she was looking at moving on to her next target and she wanted to scream.
Harper didn’t want any of them.
Harper wanted a man with big, strong shoulders, an easy smile, to-die-for eyes and a cock that would split most women in two.
Her shoulders shook as she buried her face in her hands.
She wanted Teagan.
She wanted him so bad.
Her chest felt as if it were caving in, the words in her mouth had tasted wooden.
How could she tell him he was right but even so, nothing changed?
This was the hand she’d been dealt.
Teagan Carmichael wasn’t meant to be hers.
Some woman was going to be the luckiest in the world but Harper wasn’t the one.
A spurt of illogical jealousy burned in her chest at this fictitious woman who would someday have Teagan’s heart.
Teagan...
Why?
Hadn’t she been through enough that fate could’ve been a little nicer?
Maybe if Teagan had been a sloppy kisser or a total buffoon between the sheets, she could’ve easily dismissed the attraction between them.
But that’s not what’d happened. Teagan pushed all the right buttons.
And even some buttons she hadn’t known existed.
If Teagan had been rich that would’ve solved everything.
But Teagan was a regular guy.
Hardworking, honest, kind, sexy...but not wealthy.
He couldn’t help her with her mom.
He couldn’t pad her bank account.
He wouldn’t buy her fancy jewels or expensive trips.
But he’d sure as hell love her from the tips of her toes to the top of her head.
Why couldn’t that be enough?
Harper dried her tears and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her robe. Life wasn’t fair, she reminded herself dully as she plucked a strawberry from a bowl. Sometimes life was seriously messed up.
She flopped back on the bed and Teagan’s scent enveloped her. Harper rolled onto her side, burying her nose in the bedding, inhaling every last molecule she could. He even smelled like heaven.
Right about now, she wished she had more female friends. But friends, much less other women, were not only a luxury but a liability.
Case in point, Vanessa was awesome.
Kinda like a mom, but the cool mom everyone wants to be around. But not so cool that she lets her kid be stupid and ruin their life.
And she hoped to compete with that?
Vanessa had genuine sexiness down to a science.
And Harper couldn’t bring herself to hate her because Vanessa was amazing.
Failure tasted bitter, but no more so than the realization that she was losing her ability to snap a finger and get what she wanted from men.
The crazy part was, while it might sting her ego, in the back of her mind she was a little relieved, too.
Harper was plain tired of the game. The constant strategy, the manipulation and lies.
Being with Teagan had reminded her what real happiness could feel like.
Not the shallow, brief flash of pleasure that came with new trinkets or gifts.
Keep talking yourself in a corner, that’s productive.
The derision in her own thoughts was a slap in the face, a good reminder that pity parties were unproductive and useless.
If she wanted the freedom to live her own life, she had to accept that ambition came with a cost.
Rising from the bed, she jerked the bedsheets off and tossed them in a pile to the floor. She wanted fresh sheets tonight. There was no way she was going to fall asleep with any peace if she had Teagan in her nose all night.
Bypassing the wonderful spread Teagan had ordered, she went to the bathroom to prepare for her day.
One foot in front of the other, that’s how it’s done.
No more whining about what could’ve been.
No more melancholy over what she’ll never have.
Hearts mend. Memories fade.
She just needed a little time and distance to realize that Teagan had only been a fun diversion.
In the meantime, it was a big ship—she’d just avoid him.