Jess
Why did she feel as if she always had to walk on eggshells around her sister?
Maybe because Rachel right now seemed as fragile as an entire bushel of eggs.
Her sister was obviously still upset about the mess Silas had made with the garden hose. Though Rachel tried to be bubbly and happy with the Whitakers, Jess still knew her sister well enough to see it was an act. Beneath that crackly facade, Rachel was on the edge of tears.
Her sister seemed desperately unhappy and she didn’t know how to fix it.
After the cake, Rachel insisted everyone leave the dishes for now so Jess could open presents.
She didn’t want gifts but loved them all anyway. Cody had made a beautiful wooden frame lined with magnets to go on her refrigerator and the girls had each drawn pictures of themselves that she could hang in it.
“I love it. Thank you so much.”
She hugged her nieces and nephew. The girls hugged her back while Silas mostly tolerated it.
“You’re welcome. Hopefully, it will help you remember you have a family while you’re on the road,” Rachel said.
“Thanks,” Jess said cheerfully.
“We kind of had a similar idea,” Eleanor said. Jess unwrapped their gift and was astonished to find a small watercolor she had admired at Whitaker House.
It had been painted by a friend of Jack Whitaker’s years ago and was an overview of Cape Sanctuary, with Sunshine Cove in the distance.
“I can’t accept this. It’s an original.”
“Nate and I both want you to have it. Don’t we, darling?”
Her son nodded. “Absolutely.”
“We want you to have something to remember us by after you leave. I thought it was small enough you could hang it inside your trailer so you have a little piece of Cape Sanctuary with you wherever you go.”
She was immeasurably touched by everything. “Thank you. I’ll treasure all of these gifts.”
The Whitakers stayed for a while longer as Sophie and the children were enjoying an impromptu soccer game on the grass.
After helping to clear the dishes from the patio, they then said their goodbyes with a flurry of hugs.
“I’ll take care of bedtime then come down and help you clean up the dishes,” Cody said after they were gone. He started corralling the kids up the stairs toward their rooms.
“That’s a great guy you have there,” Jess said.
“Sometimes.”
A glimpse of that unhappiness flashed across Rachel’s expression before she turned away and headed into the kitchen.
Jess followed her and started filling the sink with soapy water.
“It’s your birthday. You don’t have to help me clean up. I am perfectly capable of cleaning my own kitchen,” Rachel snapped.
“I never said you weren’t,” Jess said carefully. “I don’t mind helping. It’s the least I can do to pay you back for such a great party.”
“You don’t have to repay me. That’s the whole point. There’s no scorecard in families. And anyway, you hated the party. You don’t have to lie to me, now that we’re alone.”
She tensed. “Why would you say that?”
“Admit it. You didn’t want a party in the first place. I forced you to have it. If you had your way, you’d be holed up in your trailer by yourself.”
Had it been that obvious? She thought she had done a pretty decent job of hiding it.
Jess shoved her hands in the soapy water and scrubbed vigorously at a salad bowl. “I’m sorry I’m not a big fan of birthday parties. I told you I didn’t need one. That doesn’t mean I’m not grateful for all your hard work and didn’t enjoy the result.”
“I don’t think it’s birthday parties you don’t like. I think it’s me.”
Jess did not want to get into this right now. Or ever. “You know that’s not true.”
“I don’t. That’s the only thing I can figure out.”
“Why would you say that?”
“What else am I supposed to think? You rarely come to visit and when you do, you act like you can’t wait to leave. You’re always halfway out the door, just like Dad was.”
“I am not like Dad at all,” she said, her careful hold on her temper beginning to fray. Why did Rachel have to ruin what had been a lovely evening by bringing their parents into things?
“You might not be an abusive jerk. But you’re as closed off as he always was. I never know what’s going through your head. And I feel like I’m the one putting all the work into this relationship, just like Mom did with theirs. More often than not, I’m the one who texts or calls you and invites you to things. And most of the time, you can’t be bothered. I’m really tired of being an afterthought in your life.”
Jess gave up any pretense of washing dishes and faced her sister, trying not to let her see her hands tremble. “You’re not an afterthought. I love you. I love the kids. What do you want from me, Rachel?”
“I just want to know we matter to you.”
“Of course you matter. I only took this job in Cape Sanctuary because it meant I could be closer to you and the kids.”
“Right. Because this setup is just the way you like it. You can stop for a minute, keep everything superficial, then move on to your next job. You’ve created your life so that you have no close connections, except maybe Yvette. Even your bond with her is over the phone. That’s not normal, Jess.”
Rachel’s words stung, mostly because Jess knew she was right. She didn’t consciously push people away, but Jess knew that was the net impact.
Because it hurt so much, she reacted defensively by lashing out.
“And you’re doing just great, right? No problems here. You’re just throwing away a great marriage to a kind, caring man because you’re unhappy that your perfect Instagram life isn’t the beautiful picture you’ve always dreamed about.”
She shouldn’t have said it. As soon as the words were out, Jess regretted them, especially when Rachel seemed to pale and take a step back.
“Leave my marriage out of this.” Rachel’s voice quivered with emotion. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. How could you? You’ve never even had a relationship that lasted more than a week because you’re so screwed up about what happened with our parents that you’re afraid to let anybody get close to you.”
A second deadly but accurate uppercut. Jess was going to be dangling on the ropes in a minute. She drew in a ragged breath, not wanting Rachel to see the fresh wounds.
She had to get out of there before she said or did something she wouldn’t be able to take back.
“You’re right. I was out of line. Thank you for the birthday party. I appreciate all the effort that went into it, even though it wasn’t really for me, was it? Give my love to Cody and the kids.”
She grabbed the bag containing her birthday gifts—the ones she wasn’t sure she would ever be able to look at now without remembering the pain of this moment—and walked out of her sister’s house.