“She got mad because Paul wouldn’t let her have his phone,” Peter said as I ran into the house to find Sky on the floor throwing one heck of a fit.
“It’s okay,” I assured the boys, who looked worried. “She’s had a long day and is really tired.”
“No, I not tired,” Sky argued between sobs.
The girl could seriously argue with me about everything when she was in a mood.
“Mm-hm, you’re not tired,” I said soothingly as I picked her up. “But what do you say we go upstairs and take a bath. Relax a little bit.”
“I wanna watch Bluey,” she said, talking about the cartoon she would watch on YouTube when she had screen time.
“After your bath we can snuggle on the bed and watch Bluey, how does that sound?” I suggested, cradling her against me as her crying subsided. She was so exhausted I was sure once she’d had a bath she’d be out in minutes.
“’Kay,” Sky said, her tone no longer whiney.
“Hey, is everything okay?” Damon asked, his hand coming to my arm to stop me from climbing the stairs.
“Yeah, she’s just tuckered out. We’re going to go have a bath and then settle in for bed.”
Damon nodded, giving Sky a smile, which she sleepily returned.
“You coming back down later?”
“I’m not sure. It depends how quickly she falls asleep.”
“No sleep,” Sky said, barely half conscious but able to pick up on the words she didn’t like.
Damon chuckled and said, “So you want some company?”
I gave him a questioning look, unsure of why he would want to help me give my toddler a bath and put her to sleep. Nigel hadn’t been interested any of it and I was so used to doing everything myself, I couldn’t even fathom needing help. At least not with the mundane, everyday routines.
“Uh, no, I’ve got it,” I said, leaving him with what looked like an expression of disappointment and going upstairs.
After Sky’s bath we both got dressed for bed, her in her Bluey pajamas, and me in tank top and shorts. We climbed into bed, and I put on Bluey for her. As she watched, I thought back to the beautiful ceremony I’d witnessed with a sigh.
Summer had been absolutely stunning, and after I watched her begin to walk down the aisle, I’d shifted my attention to Noah and watched him watch her coming toward him to become his wife. He’d been ecstatic. So happy his cheeks must have hurt from smiling so much. The joy on his face had made me misty and I’d pretty much stayed that way through the vows.
Within minutes, Sky fell asleep, so I opened the balcony door and walked outside to see if everyone was still up and celebrating or if it was dying down.
The cool fragrant breeze carried music and laughter, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to go back downstairs or not. I felt confused … conflicted … and I felt like spending more time with Damon right now would only heighten those feelings.
I glanced to my right and saw my mom sitting out on her balcony, watching me quietly.
I raised a hand in greeting, and she waved me over.
After checking on Sky, I softly padded out of the room and down the hall to my parents’ room. Since she’d called me down, I entered without knocking and found the room empty.
My dad must still be downstairs, I thought, and wondered why my mom wasn’t.
I walked out onto their balcony through the open door and sat in the empty seat next to my mother.
“What are you doing up here?” I asked as I leaned back in the seat.
“I think I was feeling overwhelmed. It was a wonderful day, but a crazy last few days. I just needed some quiet.”
“Are you sure you want me here?”
“Of course,” she said, laying her hand over mine on my knee. “Now, what’s going on with you?”
“What do you mean?” I asked, although I had a feeling I knew what she wanted to discuss.
“Damon,” she replied.
I sighed and sunk lower in my seat.
“I don’t know, Mom. It’s complicated.”
“Love always is. But tell me why things between you and Damon are specifically,” she ordered softly.
I took a few minutes, gathering my thoughts and trying to make sense of them.
“I think Nigel broke me,” I said finally.
“Charlotte, do not give that stronzo any more influence on your life than he’s already had. He did not break you. He hurt you, he lied to you, he cheated on you, but you are not defined by the things he did.”
“I know, Mom, it’s just … how can I ever trust anyone again? Not just with me, but with Sky? The man who said he was going to love me forever and raise a family with me was nothing more than a character he played. The father who’s supposed to love Sky unconditionally and be there for her through thick and thin is nonexistent. So, if I can’t trust that man, the one who made vows and had a commitment, how can I trust some guy off the street?”
“Damon is not simply some guy off the street. He’s someone with strong ties to you and your family. Someone who already knows and cares about Sky. Someone who’s proven you can trust him and has never let you down.”
“As friends,” I argued. “Yes, as my friend, Damon is all of those things. But this is a man who has never been in a serious relationship. Who has never committed to anything other than himself and his goals. He’s a great man, and I love him, but would he be a great husband and father? I’m not so sure…”
“If you keep him in this box and never give him a chance, how will you ever find out? Maybe he never met a woman he was willing to make room in his life for … Maybe you are that woman.”
“I don’t know if I can take a shot on all of those maybes.”