This book will show you, in a clear and memorable way, everything you need to know to alleviate your anxiety, worry, and stress.
That’s a bold promise, and it’s one that I don’t take lightly. One reason I feel qualified to make it is that I’m a therapist who has specialized in treating anxiety disorders for twenty years. My second qualification is that I was not blessed with a relaxed, easygoing nervous system. Like you, I am hardwired for anxiety and worry.
I was an anxious child as far back as I can remember—I’ll skip the gory details about chronic nightmares, mysterious stomachaches, and endless worrying. When my anxiety persisted as a young adult I turned to therapy for help. My therapist had a psychodynamic orientation, commonly known as “talk therapy,” which is based on the premise that our problems originate in childhood and that once we have insight into them we naturally progress toward a healthier state. After a number of sessions, my therapist and I theorized that my anxiety began with my relationship with a distant and critical father, and that I developed a fear of being judged and criticized. This and other similar insights were comforting to me. It made good sense that I was anxious and it wasn’t my fault. My anxiety, however, continued.
Several years later, shortly after the birth of my first child, Max, I started having panic attacks. If you’ve ever experienced a panic attack—almost 50% of the adult population has had at least one—you know what I mean when I say they are really, really horrible. My entire body was seized with crippling fear, my heart pounded, and I got almost instant diarrhea. My vision became distorted, my hearing was altered—everything seemed unreal.
Soon I was having panic attacks at random times throughout the day. Sometimes they woke me up in the middle of the night. I thought I might be going crazy. I had a child to take care of and I was beginning my professional career as a therapist. I was terrified that my panic attacks would interfere with the things that were most important to me: raising a family and working. I knew I needed help.
My new therapist and I decided that the responsibility of a newborn was probably what triggered my anxiety. We explored how my past made me vulnerable for developing anxiety. Once again I was getting all sorts of insights. But the panic attacks just kept coming.
My therapist and I thought relaxation would help, so I committed myself to practicing relaxation every day. I faithfully tried one relaxation tape after another, thinking the next might do the trick. Still, there was no relief. I found someone who did biofeedback, a type of relaxation training where you are hooked up to a machine that gives you an immediate reading as to how relaxed your body is. I was a very motivated participant, but still, the panic attacks came.
I was desperate. Everything I was doing to figure out why this was happening to me and to stop it from happening was not working. I began to have serious doubts about my career choice. How could I help others if I couldn’t help myself?
Then in a local bookstore one day I saw a title that jumped off the shelf at me: Don’t Panic by Reid Wilson. I started to read it right then and there, and within a few minutes I was standing in the aisle fighting back tears of relief. I had finally found someone who understood what was happening to me.
What I discovered from reading Wilson’s book was that the reason why I was having panic attacks was not nearly as important as how I was reacting to them. My attempts to fix the problem—analyzing it, figuring it out, trying to get rid of it with relaxation training—were actually making things worse. I needed to respond completely differently to my panic attacks. Once I learned to take a different stance toward panic, I was able to cure myself from it.
Don’t Panic was my first introduction to cognitive behavioral therapy. CBT is not concerned so much with how your problems developed, but what is maintaining them now. Inspired by my personal experience, I retrained myself with books and workshops, and by consultation with some of the best CBT therapists in the field. Changing my professional orientation to CBT has transformed my job effectiveness and satisfaction immeasurably.
It was not until later in my career that I realized that focusing on what is maintaining problems is not only effective for all types of anxiety and depression, but for living a fuller, more self-actualized life. Whether you want to free yourself from a specific problem, like me and my panic attacks, or you simply want to live a happier, more successful, and more peaceful life, the tools to use are the same.
I often tell my clients who suffer from anxiety disorders that they are the lucky ones. They are lucky in the sense that, unlike most people whose anxieties can be tolerated, their anxiety is too serious to ignore. They have a real motivation to seek help. What I have to teach them will not only help them with their anxiety, it will help them with whatever problems arise in the future.
Do you have the motivation to change? If you do, read on! Everything you need to know is right here in this book.