One of my buddies at the Ozark Jubilee was Porter Wagoner. He was so funny and everybody loved him, thanks to his goofy mannerisms and great stories. Porter’s steel guitar player on the show was Don Warden, who was also his manager, and later Dolly Parton’s longtime manager. We were all out doing a show one time when Don married his wife, Ann. They needed someone to stand with them, so the four of us went out to a preacher’s home somewhere in one of the Carolinas, I believe. Porter stood with Don while I stood with Ann. That was my introduction to being a bridesmaid, but it definitely wasn’t my last. Over the next several years, it seemed like all my friends were getting married. It’s an old cliché, but I soon found myself always a bridesmaid, but never a bride.
Technically, I did have one suitor. Smokey Smith was a promoter in Des Moines, Iowa, who booked me fairly often. When I’d go up there to play, Daddy didn’t go because I could stay with Smokey and his family at their home. He and his wife had a little four-year-old boy named Leon, who decided he loved me. His mother told me Leon was in Sunday School one time when the teacher had the children go around the room, announce their name, and say that they loved Jesus. All the little kids did it, but when it got to Leon he said, “I’m Leon Smith and I love Wanda Jatten!”
“That’s nice Leon, but do you love Jesus?” the teacher said.
“No, I love Wanda Jatten!” he said.
I had been casually dating a disc jockey in Oklahoma City on the rare occasions when I was at home, and Leon must have overheard some conversation about it. I arrived at the Smith family’s door one afternoon and was met by Leon, who was red-faced and mad.
“Wanda Jatten! Are you gonna marry that jitt jockey?!?!?!” he demanded.
“No, Leon. I probably won’t marry him,” I said. He narrowed his eyes and put his hands on his hips.
“Okay,” he replied. “You better not!”
My closest friend on the Jubilee was Norma Jean Beasler, who later became known in country music circles as “Pretty Miss Norma Jean.” She was also from Oklahoma City and was one grade behind me in school. Norma Jean and I first got to know each other at KLPR, where we were both appearing during the local talent portion of Jay Davis’s radio show. Even though we went to the same school and were performing on the same shows and contests, we weren’t real close back then. Norma Jean was shy, and we just didn’t really connect on a deep level. By the time we were both out of school and pursuing our music careers, however, we got to be good friends. After I was hired at the Jubilee I told them, “I know a pretty blonde in Oklahoma City who sings real good.” They auditioned her and hired her for the show.
Norma Jean and I liked to go out together and have fun. One time she invited me to a New Year’s Eve dance to ring in 1961. I was booked in Las Vegas playing a show at the Nugget, so I wasn’t able to join her. Several days later I called Norma Jean to wish her a happy New Year and to find out if she had fun at the dance.
“It was great,” she told me. “I wound up going with a guy I met recently, but I wasn’t really interested in him. Then, this other good-lookin’ guy just boldly came right up and asked me to dance. My date was pretty shy, so he said it would be okay.”
I laughed, imagining Norma Jean juggling her options on the dance floor. “Well, look at you,” I joked. “It sounds like you’ve just got too many guys to handle.”
“Oh, and that’s not all,” she continued. “This new guy was there with a date of his own. We kind of just forgot all about who we came with. We must have danced three or four songs together before somebody came out to the dance floor and said neither of our dates seemed too thrilled they’d been left waiting at their respective tables for us. We just lost track of time, I guess. He was so handsome that it wasn’t hard to do. But he made sure he got my phone number. His name is Wendell Goodman, and he’s picking me up for a date tonight.”
I wished her luck, promised we’d talk again in a few days, and hung up the phone wishing I could have been there for Norma’s latest adventure on the dance floor.
I was playing at the Golden Nugget most of January, so I didn’t talk to Norma Jean again for a couple of weeks. I finally called to catch up. “Hey, how was your date with that good-looking guy from New Year’s Eve?” I asked. “What was his name? William?”
Norma Jean chuckled and said, “No, his name’s Wendell and he’s here with me right now. Would you like to say ‘hi’ to him?”
“Yeah, sure,” I said, not thinking much of it. When Norma Jean put Wendell on the phone and I heard his voice, my knees buckled. I started stuttering and had difficulty getting my thoughts together. It sounds crazy, but it was as if I instantly fell for him, just from hearing his voice. I couldn’t wait to meet him. I wanted to see what this guy looked like, if just talking to him on the phone had that effect on me!
I returned to Oklahoma City at the end of the month on a night when Norma Jean happened to have a date with Wendell. I called her and said, “Come by the house later. I want to see you and meet your new boyfriend.” As soon as they came into the house and I saw Wendell, that was it. It was love at first sight. I’d had it. I thought, How in the world can I ever be with this guy when he’s with my best friend? Little did I know that as soon as Wendell saw me, he was thinking, How am I gonna get rid of Norma Jean so I can date Wanda?
Every time I’d come in from the road I’d call Norma Jean. I was with Daddy day and night when I was touring, so the last thing I wanted to do was sit around the house with him when I was home. I wanted to go out with my friends, but they were all getting married and having kids. Norma Jean was my reliable single friend, but it seemed like maybe I was losing her, too. It got to the point where every time I’d call she’d say, “Well, I’ve got a date with Wendell tonight, so I guess we can’t do anything.”
“I don’t want to sit here all night,” I said. “Ask Wendell if I could go along with y’all. I’ll pay my way if you go to a movie or whatever.” She asked him, and he said it sure seemed strange, but he said okay because he had his eye on me and I had mine on him. I wanted to be around him. Poor Norma. We used her, I guess. Wendell said he was the most popular guy in town. He had a blonde on one arm and a brunette on the other. We’d go out to eat or go dancing, and Wendell ended up paying for both of us. He wouldn’t let me pay for anything.
If I’m honest, I was beginning to get a little jealous that Norma Jean had found such a great guy. I had had a heartbreak along the way here and there that just made me kind of cynical about relationships. I remember one time I got in the car with Norma and Wendell. I was mad because Daddy had been talking to me about something. I got in and said, “I know the secret now. You have to just work, work, work, and make all the money you can. You can’t have any other kind of life. I’m not going to do anything but work from now on!” I just felt left out of life. I provided the entertainment and watched while other people had a great time. But I wasn’t having a great time. I was working. If I was upset or in pain, I still had to work. I had to make that job. There was no time for love and romance for Wanda, and I was afraid my best friend was about to run off with the guy of my dreams.
Around that time things were changing at the Ozark Jubilee. ABC didn’t think a country music show could hold its own if they didn’t bring in some pop performers. They brought in Don Cherry as the pop singer, as well as Pat Boone, who was Red Foley’s son-in-law. That always irked us a little bit. We country folks started the show, and it was getting more and more popular. Why did we need pop artists to come in to help us or make us more legitimate? Well, we didn’t! They were all nice people, so it wasn’t anything personal, but the spirit of the show changed over time. After a while, it began to feel like it just wasn’t really going anywhere. We stopped getting the really good country guests when the flavor of the show changed, and I was also getting tired of making that long drive between Oklahoma and Springfield. I could see the handwriting on the wall and decided to leave. I think the show was taken off the air not long after that.
During this period, our friend Porter Wagoner had established a solid career thanks to his appearances on The Ozark Jubilee. He had several big hits in the 1950s, including “A Satisfied Mind” and “What Would You Do? (If Jesus Came to Your House)” that earned him an invitation to join the cast of the Grand Ole Opry. He decided to leave the Jubilee and head to Nashville. He eventually had the opportunity to launch his own television show. Porter always had a “girl singer” on his TV program and, even though Dolly Parton was the best known, she wasn’t the first. When he was just getting his show off the ground, Porter asked Norma Jean to leave the Jubilee and join the cast of his show in Nashville. It was a great opportunity for her, but it would mean leaving Oklahoma City—and her new boyfriend, Wendell—behind.
Norma decided to take the job with Porter. Right before she left, she pulled me aside and said, “Wanda, I don’t think Wendell has a lot of friends here. It hasn’t been that long since he moved up from Texas, and he’s not really settled yet. He mostly works with older people at his job, and I just hate leaving him all alone. Would you be willing to look after him?”
Would I? That was just the chance I’d been looking for! “Okay,” I told Norma. “I’ll be sure to take care of him.” That gave me a license. Norma Jean left in March, and the way was clear for me and Wendell. I wanted to call him the minute she pulled out of town, but I managed to restrain myself for about a week. Finally, I called him up and asked him out for a date. Girls did not do that in 1961, but I just wanted to be with this guy so bad. We both liked to bowl, so I suggested we go bowling that night. He jumped at the chance. Once we got there we talked about Norma Jean. But that only lasted for about five minutes before we quickly moved on to other topics.
Being with Wendell seemed like the most natural thing in the world. I was gone a lot, but whenever I was at home we were together. When I was on the road we talked on the phone whenever possible. I had always enjoyed dating and had a thing for handsome guys, but this was something different. After Elvis and I drifted apart my girlfriends would ask, “Why didn’t you latch on to him?” I had a crush on him, but something told me that what I had with Elvis just wasn’t meant to last. I wasn’t in love, even though Elvis was great. Or maybe I just wasn’t that serious about wanting to get married at the time. With Wendell it was completely different. There was just a connection between us, as if we were designed to be together.
Wendell told me later that he fell in love with me the first time he heard the song “Right or Wrong,” even though he didn’t know me then. It’s funny, because I realized later that I had written that song about Wendell, even though I hadn’t met him yet. It was about the kind of relationship I was looking for, and the one I found with him.
About a month after we started dating, Wendell came to see me play at the Trianon Ballroom in Oklahoma City. I was wearing a beautiful dress that night that Mother had made for me. In fact, it’s the same dress I’m wearing on the cover of the second CD box set that Bear Family Records released of my recordings. After my set we were out on the dance floor together when Wendell told me he loved me. Up to that point I would usually say “love ya” when I’d tell him goodbye or write it in notes and things. But when he said “I love you” it was different. The sincerity of his words almost caught me off guard. I probably didn’t give the right response. Instead of saying, “Oh, Wendell, I love you, too,” I wound up saying, “Are you sure?” I don’t know what prompted me to say that. I knew he was sure. I was sure, too. I knew it was real, and I knew I loved him, too.
My relationship with Wendell felt like just the right fit. Somehow, we both knew we’d spend the rest of our lives together. About four months after we started dating, I was playing a show in Minneapolis. I was in my motel room talking on the phone with Wendell when he said, “Your mother was wondering if you wanted to register for some nice dishes for our home.”
“Well, wait a minute,” I said. “Y’all are moving pretty fast, don’t you think? You haven’t even asked me to marry you yet!” Wendell kind of laughed to himself.
“I haven’t? Well, Wanda, I was wondering if you’d make me the happiest man in the world by becoming my wife. Will you marry me?”
He asked me right then and there on the phone! Of course, I said yes. We both just knew. In fact, we knew it so deeply that Wendell truly hadn’t realized that he’d not actually asked me yet!
Even though I was engaged, I wasn’t the stereotypical twenty-three-year-old bride-to-be you would find in 1961. I never did want a big wedding. That didn’t even enter my mind. I was a bridesmaid for cousins and friends with all the to-do, and I would think, Why would anyone spend all that money? Just go marry the boy and live happily ever after! It finally dawned on me that I didn’t have to have my special day, because I already had it all the time. I always had the spotlight, so I didn’t need a fairy-tale wedding. That part of me was already fulfilled. I’m sure that made Daddy and Wendell happy when it came to the planning.
I was out on the road most of the time, so Mother and Wendell took care of arranging everything. I had all these dates booked, so we had to find a small window of time when we could get married. I only had two requests. I said, “I will be married in a Baptist church, and Mother and Daddy will be there.” They found a little time in my schedule for us to get married in early November, and it was Mother who helped Wendell pick our first apartment and furnish it in preparation for our new life together.
Mother, Daddy, Wendell, and I drove two hours down to Gainesville, just across the Texas border, where we were married in the fall of 1961. We had been dating for eight months. We went to Texas because you didn’t have to wait a week to get married after getting a blood test. I was hardly ever in one place for a week, so that wasn’t going to work! We went to the Justice of the Peace to get our license, then headed to a Baptist church. The preacher took us in his office and had a little talk about marriage and whether or not we were ready to commit. We were ready! We drove back to Oklahoma City that night and stopped along the way to have a spaghetti dinner to celebrate. The next day I hit the road for a tour with Johnny Cash, and Wendell took two weeks off from his job with Admiral Oil to come along. Not exactly a romantic honeymoon on a beach, but we were just thrilled to finally be married.
I was still living with Mother and Daddy when Wendell and I met, and he was still living with his parents, too. Neither of us had ever lived on our own or even had a roommate! We were both ready to get out of our parents’ houses, but it hadn’t been feasible for me before that point. Daddy took care of all my business and Mother took care of the clothes, so they wanted me there with them. Once Wendell and I moved into our first apartment, however, it seemed like we’d always been married. I felt like I was home with him.
Because we were equally inexperienced with living on our own, we did have to overcome a few little snags that most new couples have to deal with. Wendell had to shame me into hanging my clothes up, which was something Mother battled with me about forever. I had to get onto him about hanging the bathroom towels up. He’d throw them somewhere while they were damp and they wouldn’t dry out. We fought over where to squeeze the toothpaste tube for years. I don’t know why it didn’t occur to us to just buy separate tubes!
When Wendell and I got married, I don’t think I’d ever washed a load of laundry in my life. I didn’t know how to do that kind of stuff! After a couple of weeks, Wendell said, “Hon, what are you going to do about the laundry? I’m running low on socks.”
“Well, I don’t really know how,” I said.
“Call Tom and he’ll help you,” he said.
So I called Daddy and asked if he’d ever done laundry before. He said, “Sure, I can show you.” He came over and we hauled this big old bag of wash to the laundromat together. Daddy opened up the bundle and pulled out a piece. He said, “Okay, this one goes here,” and started a stack. “This one goes over here,” he said as he started another pile. He went on and on like that and was just sorting everything into three stacks.
Finally, I said, “What are these stacks for, and how do you know what goes where?”
“Well, I don’t know, but your mother always makes two or three stacks, so I think that’s what you’re supposed to do,” he said.
Needless to say, our stacks had no rhyme or reason to how they were sorted. Wendell’s black socks all wound up with fuzzy white towel lint on them, and he was probably one of the first men to ever wear pink underwear after I turned all the whites different colors!
I definitely couldn’t cook! I had a little time off from the road soon after we were married, and decided I would make Wendell a nice meal. I didn’t even know where to start, so I called my friend Beverly, who was already married and had started a family. She said, “I’ll tell you what. I’ll come over and help you.” When she got there I watched her cook a great dinner with fried chicken, gravy, and all these wonderful sides. She got out of there by 5:15, so when Wendell arrived home from work at 5:30, I had the feast spread out on the table. He had no idea Beverly had been there. After we ate, he just bragged and bragged on the meal, going on about how great it was and what a wonderful job I’d done. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was all Beverly’s doing. You’d think it would have occurred to me that it was going to be hard to keep up the ruse very long, but I didn’t think that far in advance. I’m sure Wendell wondered why the quality of my cooking dramatically declined by the next meal.
I didn’t even know how to mix a martini. I’d heard about having a drink before dinner. Mother didn’t approve of drinking, so that never happened at our house. But it sounded very grown up to me, so we got some bottles and made sure that we had a cocktail and a cigarette before dinner. There I was, Mrs. Wendell Goodman, embarking on a new life that felt unbelievably natural, even though it was entirely different from anything I’d known before.