11. Q: What’s the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?
A: The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
10. Q: How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to climb the ladder, one to shake it, and one to sue the ladder company.
9. Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
A: His partners.
8. Q: What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?
A: A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
7. Q: Why does the Law Society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
6. Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don’t you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bicycle.
5. Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and God?
A: God doesn’t think he’s a lawyer.
4. Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a liar?
A: The pronunciation.
3. and 2 Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
A: Your Honor.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
A: Senator.
And the number 1. lawyer joke . . .
1. Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Only three. The rest are true stories.