Princess Gusty Ox pulled off her white satin shoes and hitched up her skirts. Then she took a running jump and landed with a great splash in the moat.
It was like being in a jacuzzi! All the crocodiles were so desperate to get away that the water churned and frothed and soon the princess’s make-up was all washed away and her curls were ruined.
Princess Gusty Ox clambered out of the moat with her hair hanging like wet string from her head.
‘Yesss!’ she cried, punching the air with her fist. Then she ran up to the nursery, ripped off her silly, tight dress and climbed into her own clothes and her size-eleven boots. Last of all, she fixed her precious pocket axe to her belt and fastened it round her waist.
Prince Marvin and Princess Lulu were having such a brilliant time jumping up and down that at first they didn’t even notice Princess Gusty Ox standing by the trampoline.
‘You look amazing!’ shouted Princess Lulu the Luscious. ‘What’s that thing around your waist?’
‘My pocket axe!’ yelled Princess Gusty Ox. ‘I use it to chop down trees and slice up dragon meat!’
‘Will you teach me how to do that?’ shouted Princess Lulu.
‘Of course I will,’ yelled Princess Gusty Ox. ‘We’ll go hunting tomorrow!’
‘Yippee!’ cried Princess Lulu at the top of her voice.
Prince Marvin bounced up and down, completely tongue-tied. He had never known someone who could look so beautiful. A great whooshy feeling washed over him. The air seemed to sparkle with diamonds. Birds seemed to sing like tiny, feathered angels. His heart began to beat to a new and wonderful rhythm.
Prince Marvin was in love and he felt absolutely marvellous!
‘So that’s why I brought Princess Lulu to see you,’ Lady Hayseed was saying to King Cudgel. ‘The poor girl has never had any fun in her life, and if her mother gets her way and she marries that dreadful Godric creature, she never will.’
‘Godric the Geek is the weediest twit in the kingdom,’ agreed King Cudgel. ‘What’s more, he’s rubbish at embroidery. She can’t possibly get stuck with him.’
Suddenly the air was filled with yells and screams of delight.
King Cudgel walked over to the window. ‘Sounds like they’re playing on the trampoline.’
In the corner of the room, Quail could see that the Lady Hayseed was puzzled. ‘If I might explain, your ladyship,’ he said. ‘A trampoline is something you bounce up and down on.’
‘Gracious!’ cried Lady Hayseed. She thought for a moment then her eyes gleamed. ‘Does it by any chance make your tummy go all fizzy so you want to laugh all the time?’
‘Why, yes,’ replied Quail, slightly taken aback. ‘I do believe it does!’
‘Haven’t you ever been on a trampoline?’ King Cudgel asked Lady Hayseed.
‘Have you?’ she replied.
King Cudgel turned to Quail. ‘Have I?’
Quail shook his head.
‘Are you quite sure, Quail?’
‘Positive, sire.’
King Cudgel held out his arm to the Lady Hayseed. ‘What do you say we have a go, Ethelberta?’ he asked, grandly.
Crackle had never seen such a sight. The entire royal family, along with Princess Lulu and the Lady Hayseed, were jumping up and down on the trampoline, laughing their heads off.
‘The Princess Gusty Ox seems to have recovered,’ observed Quail, who stood behind an enormous tea trolley laden with cakes and biscuits and two sliced loaves of black bread and mouse jam.
‘Indeed,’ agreed Crackle. ‘That was a nasty moment.’ A cunning look flickered across the wizard’s face. ‘And have you noticed the change in Prince Marvin?’
Quail nodded. ‘I smell a wedding barbecue.’
‘Exactly.’
At that moment, there was a tremendous crash and Princess Gusty Ox landed beside them. Her hair was like a haystack and her knees were scabbed above her size-eleven boots. ‘Princess Lulu is amazing,’ she said breathlessly. ‘She’s my first real friend.’
‘So you won’t be needing that book I lent you any more,’ said Quail, smiling.
Princess Gusty Ox smiled back. ‘It’s a load of old rubbish, isn’t it?’
‘Yes,’ said Quail. ‘But you had to find that out for yourself.’
Then Princess Gusty Ox turned to Crackle and took a deep breath. ‘I have an apology to make—’ she began.
Crackle shook his head. ‘No you don’t, Princess Gusty Ox. I should never have left my study door unlocked.’
Princess Gusty Ox chewed her lip. ‘You know that nasty rabbit,’ she said at last. ‘Did it really mean it when it said I was a fat, good-for-nothing princess?’
‘Do you think it was true when it said Princess Lulu was a proper princess?’ replied Crackle.
Princess Gusty Ox thought hard. ‘No,’ she said at last. ‘Everything was pack of lies and I should never have asked the question in the first place.’
‘Clever girl!’ cried Crackle. ‘You’ve learned a lot today!’
‘I think the princess deserves a reward, don’t you?’ said Quail.
‘Most certainly,’ replied Crackle.
He waved his magic wand and Princess Gusty Ox suddenly found herself soaring through the air!
The next moment, she landed with a thump on the trampoline.
She grabbed Princess Lulu’s hand and the two of them bounced high over the trees and right over Crunchbone Castle.
Princess Gusty Ox turned to her new friend and let out a whoop of joy! She had never felt so happy in all of her life!