Day 34
Love celebrates godliness
[Love] does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. —1 Corinthians 13:6
The closer you and your spouse are to God, the more loving you will be in marriage (John 13:34–35). Our roles as husband or wife are greatly enhanced by becoming growing Christians. People who don’t rely on God are significantly limited, left to depend on their own changing feelings, selfish thinking, and human efforts. But with Him, we have daily access to His toolbox for marriage. His Word nourishes us spiritually and equips us (2 Timothy 3:16–17). His counsel guides our thoughts and decisions with wisdom (James 1:5). His Holy Spirit works to improve our attitudes and mature us from the inside out (Galatians 5:22–25). Every act of hatred, every subtle deception, and every plot of unfaithfulness is vetoed by His love.
But on those days when we—even as believers—refuse to prayerfully depend upon Him, walk in His love, or obey His commands, we can become spiritually dry. Pride and selfishness can begin to take over. Anger, impatience, and thoughtlessness can become our default. Then our spouses and families are left to deal with the fallout.
Walking in fellowship with God is better than a thousand marriage books or counseling sessions, as helpful as these resources can be. Men who are walking closely with God each day won’t deceive or degrade their wives. When God is guiding a woman’s mouth, she will encourage her family instead of complaining or tearing them down. Simply put, one of the greatest priorities for your marriage should be daily cultivating your relationship with God while celebrating any spiritual growth in your spouse.
What makes you the proudest of your husband? What overjoys you the most in your wife? Is it when he wins at golf or she finds a great deal at the mall? Or are you most impressed when he gathers the family to pray and read the Word before bed, or when she forgives the neighbor whose dog dug up some of your plants? You are one of the most influential people in your spouse’s life. They will want to please whoever praises them the most. Have you been using your influence to lead them to honor God?
Love rejoices most in the things that please God. When your mate is growing in Christian character, persevering in faith, seeking purity, and embracing roles of giving and service—becoming spiritually active in your home—the Bible says you should be celebrating it. More than when they save money on the grocery bill. More than when they achieve success at work.
It should be romantic for a woman to see her strong husband humbling himself before God. It should be inspiring for a man to see his wife living with deep spiritual conviction and passion. You should rejoice and be absolutely thrilled, excitedly cheering them on for what they’re allowing God to accomplish in their lives.
The apostle Paul often wrote in his letters how delighted he was to hear reports of people’s faithfulness and growth in Jesus. “We ought always to give thanks to God for you, brethren, as is only fitting, because your faith is greatly enlarged, and the love of each one of you toward one another grows ever greater; therefore, we ourselves speak proudly of you among the churches of God” (2 Thessalonians 1:3–4).
Sometimes, by accepting modern culture’s take on what to applaud in our spouse, we can actually be guilty of encouraging them to sin, perhaps by feeding their vanity or by letting boys be boys. But “love does not rejoice in unrighteousness”—not in ourselves, and not in our mate. Rather, love “rejoices with the truth,” the way the apostle John did when he said, “I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth” (3 John 4). He knew that the pursuit of godliness, purity, and faithfulness—remaining unjaded and uncompromising in life—was the only way for them to please God, complete their purpose, and find joy and fulfillment in life.
But what if your spouse is not a believer? How can you champion godly behavior in them if they don’t believe in God and refuse to submit to Him? Paul told believing spouses to stay true to their unbelieving mates, pray for them, and live an exemplary life before them in reverence to God (1 Corinthians 7:10–16). Yes, this may invite ridicule in some marriages. But when Christ takes over a man’s heart, the long-term life change and spiritual transformation God develops in him is a powerful testimony that is hard for his wife to deny. Scripture exhorts wives to quietly use their submission, purity, and respectful behavior to win over their husbands (1 Peter 3:1–2). Sometimes you may feel as if you are only making it more difficult for your spouse to see Jesus in you. But stay prayerful, respectful, and loving. God is not finished with them yet. He has placed a witness to Himself right in their bed next to them.
What more could you want for your wife or husband than for them to experience the best that life has to offer—the best that God has to offer! So, yes, be encouraged and happy for any success your spouse enjoys. But save your heartiest congratulations for those times when they are taking closer steps to God and honoring Him as their First Love.
TODAY'S DARE
Find a specific, recent example when your spouse demonstrated Christian character in a noticeable way (faith, love, honesty, patience, kindness, service, compassion, humility, etc.). Verbally commend them for this at some point today.
____ Check here when you’ve completed today’s dare.
What example did you choose to recognize? How many other ways could you celebrate their growth in godliness? How could you encourage them to persevere in it?
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