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Arlana sat on the porch. The scent of pastry baking in the oven wafted through the open window but wasn't as strong as it had been inside. She'd excused herself for some fresh air, still battling morning sickness and not ready for Rivkah and her family to know just yet. Besides, she needed to clear her dark thoughts. This was a joyous occasion, a time of celebration. She wouldn't allow her disappointment to turn to bitterness, already feeling the blackness creeping across her chest, tightening its grasp.
What had she really expected? Josiah to sweep her into his arms, gushing how much he had missed her in their nearly three-month separation? Lachlan would have... but Josiah was clearly a very different man.
Arlana rubbed her temples, head pounding with an oncoming migraine. She had no way of knowing at that moment that Josiah wasn't ignoring her. He was planning their marriage and future, discussing with his brother what was best for her.
Fickle heart, unable to see the big picture.
Arlana's cell phone vibrated in her pocket. She dug it out of her skirt pocket as she watched Lachlan play soccer in the yard with her son. All she had wanted for years was for Aziel to have a good dad. A father who loved him. A man such as Lachlan. Arlana smiled watching them before glancing down at her lit phone. She was unaware that Josiah and his brother had joined her, Rivkah following with a tray of iced tea.
Arlana's eyes scanned her sister's message, then looked up as the men took a seat, accepting a dew-kissed glass. Rivkah passed Arlana a drink before calling Aziel and Lachlan over to join them.
"Thank you," Arlana choked on the lump in her throat.
"Is everything okay?" Rivkah frowned, setting down the tray before taking Aziel onto her lap.
"He's gone. Died just after lunch. The funeral will be in two days. My grandfather is gone." Her eyes stung with tears that refused to fall. "Adelaide says the wake is tomorrow morning..."
Lachlan leaned against the railing. He wanted to go to her, comfort her, but held back.
"Will your brothers be taking you again?" he spoke up.
"No, I don't think so. They said they aren't sure if they will be going or not. Jared doesn't think he can get time off work," she skimmed the messages that were coming in quick succession now from both her sister and brother.
Lachlan raked his fingers through his hair, frustrated at not being able to do anything but watch Arlana struggle, a myriad of emotions dancing across her face.
Rivkah blinked back tears, empathizing with Arlana's pain. She'd had her share of death, feeling greatly the pain Arlana must be enduring. She stood up, sitting beside Arlana on the steps, wrapping her arms around the younger woman.
"If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask..." she wasn't sure what to say.
"My Yachidh," Josiah's voice was a soft murmur and for a moment, although Arlana didn't understand his words, she felt Josiah's tenderness towards her as he joined her, holding her hand. He entwined her fingers in his, offering support and strength without saying a word. Arlana savoured the moment, the first time he had touched her since returning, but right now her thoughts were on her grandfather and the funeral.
****
ARLANA STRUGGLED TO deal with Josiah's chosen absence and the thought that his job was more of a priority than her. She didn't respond to him, biting her lip instead. Tears brimmed her eyes.
Lachlan looked away, scuffing his shoe on the wooden planks.
Shaul had remained silent, not saying a word. He watched the interaction between his brother and Arlana, weighing the situation and how they should proceed, but kept silent.
Shaul stood, pacing the narrow veranda, "You cannot be near the dead, Josiah, or go to a cemetery. Taking Arlana is out of the question..."
The weight of their lineage was not something they would take lightly. Josiah knew being near the dead was not permitted. It was ceremonially unclean.
Arlana looked into Josiah's eyes.
Josiah lowered his head, "It is true. I cannot take you." He did not explain why. "I would if it were possible, but it cannot be."
"I can take her," Lachlan offered.
Arlana's heart skipped a beat at Lachlan's offer.
Shaul frowned. "You cannot be alone together. Aziel's presence does not count." He ran his fingers through his hair, adjusting his kippah. "Unless..."
Josiah could take her into the city, as long as he didn't go near the funeral home or cemetery. He could accompany them as a chaperone and get to know his wife's family better once the funeral was over.
Before Shaul could state his idea, Arlana pulled her hand out of Josiah's. "I want my sister, Jaira, to join us."
Lachlan nodded, "Of course I could take her as well. Then it is settled? We could leave early..."
Shaul frowned, but it was a viable option. Besides, if they drove her down, they would need to be back before sundown as it would be entering into the Sabbath. If the traffic was bad, or something unforeseen came up...well, this might be a better option, but something in his spirit warned him they were making a mistake.
Unable to see why it could be a problem, he nodded, "It is only right that Jaira attends the funeral and give your grandfather that respect, so I believe she will come. When you tell her, be sure to invite her to partake of Rosh Hashanah with us. She is family and will be most welcome," Shaul paused, eyeing Lachlan, "Where will you stay?"
If Jaira came, she could act as a chaperone instead of Josiah, so Josiah could stay home and not risk being out after the Sabbath began. Everything rested on Jaira's response.
"I don't know. I"m not sure where we will stay. I have to talk to Adelaide about it. As for Jaira, no one else told her grandpa is dying, so they won't be expecting her at the funeral. She is the family's black sheep at the moment..." she didn't say more.
"Go ahead and contact her. I'm more than willing to drive her as well, but see if she can meet us here so we don't lose time," Lachlan instructed as though the plan was set in stone.
"I'm not sure if her husband will let her go, but I'll ask. If she doesn't come, I'm sure it will be a huge regret. Thank you so much. This really means a lot." Arlana turned back to her phone sending a text.
"Jaira, Grandpa passed away today. Adelaide sent me a message saying that the funeral is this Friday. I am not sure where we will stay yet, but I'd like for you to come down. My friend has offered to drive us if you can get here. We could meet you at the train station."
"Omg! I can't believe he is gone! But I'm not wanted, so I'm not going to go. Grandpa knows I loved him. That's all that matters."
"Jaira, if you don't go, I'm certain you will regret this for the rest of your life. It isn't something you can go back and change your mind about later. Once he is in the ground, that is it. Talk to William about it. Seriously though, it isn't about Adelaide or our parents or anyone else. It is about Grandpa and honouring his memory. It really is the very least that we can do."
"I hear you. Okay, I'll text William and get back to you. Give me five minutes."
Arlana straightened her back, messaging Adelaide, "Hey Adelaide, I'm so sorry to hear about Grandpa. This must be really hard for you. Were you there when he passed? My friend has offered to drive me down," she purposely avoided the possibility that Jaira would be joining them. Leave it as a surprise. There was no point in starting drama early especially when the grief over grandpa's death was very raw.
"I don't want to talk about grandpa's death. It is too soon. I need some space. Who is driving you? I know the boys aren't," Adelaide referred to their younger brothers.
"My friend Lachlan. He was able to take the time off work, so he offered to bring us down for the funeral."
"You can't stay at my place. I don't have the room."
A bald-faced lie.
Adelaide had more than enough room for her parents and extended family to visit. Why not now?
Arlana didn't press the issue, "Okay, that's fine. Thanks for letting me know. I'll see you at the funeral."
"Fine. It starts at 10 am for family."
"See you then."