“TRAUMA ONE, PROBABLE UTI,” Emma said to one of the residents standing nearby as she stepped out into the hall and closed the curtain behind her. “White blood cell count is twelve thousand, with neutrophils slightly elevated. There’s a trace of blood and plus four bacteria in the urine. The patient reports tenderness in the abdomen and in the mid-low back.”
The resident nodded, then glanced down the hall toward the nurses’ station. “There’s, uh, someone here to see you, Nurse Trudeau.”
“Who?” Emma frowned. They were slammed today. Nothing major yet, but lots of flu cases and colds. She handed her tablet containing the patient’s chart to the resident, then headed toward the nurses’ station, checking her smartwatch along the way. Only two thirty, so too early for Thad.
Yet when she rounded the corner, there he stood, scowling at their assignment board like it was his worst enemy.
Emma sighed. After yesterday, her thinking about him had shifted. Oh, the man was still intimidating, no doubt. At least the rest of the department seemed to think so, seeing how they all gave him a wide berth. But witnessing his vulnerable side in the kitchen the previous night had made a difference for her. She could no longer think of him as just a means to an end to get the charity carnival done. Nope. Growing up, her parents had always warned Emma her soft heart would get her in trouble one day, but it had become one of her greatest assets in her work. Allowing her to understand and empathize with others in a way that built their trust in her and got them to tell her their problems. Of course, she’d learned to put limits on it, too, put up walls to protect herself from those who wanted too much, who drained her energy until there was nothing left. And yes, maybe she’d grown too good at keeping others out over the years, which explained why she was still single at twenty-eight. But Emma was happy with her life and grateful for what she had. Even if what she had at the moment was her partner on the carnival project glaring at her with those icicle-blue eyes.
Despite her wishes, her chest squeezed with unwanted attraction. The man was hot, maybe more so because of his air of cool untouchability. Was it weird to lust after a Grinch? Maybe. Probably.
Get it together, girl.
She shook off the silly thoughts and forced a polite smile. “You’re early, Dr. Markson.”
“What?” He didn’t look away from the board.
“Our meeting isn’t until three fifteen, Dr. Markson,” Emma said, used to his brusqueness now.
His nose twitched slightly, and he blinked at her, then shook his head. “I’m not here for that. I was called down for a consult on a suspected case of acute decompensated heart failure?”
“Oh.” Emma said, focusing on her work and not how handsome he looked in his lab coat. “Okay. Yes, that would be Ms. Lovelace in trauma bay four.”
“Right.” He started that way, then stopped and said over his shoulder, “I’ll need assistance, Nurse Trudeau.”
Emma quickly filled in one of the other nurses to help the resident with the UTI, then followed Dr. Markson. Used to Thad’s “bedside manner,” Emma hurried to enter the patient’s room before him and stood by Ms. Lovelace’s side to act as a friendly buffer from what she expected to be Thad’s more formal exam questions.
Sure enough, Thad started bombarding the older woman the moment he stepped into the room. “You have difficulty breathing and swollen feet. Show me.”
Emma cringed on behalf of his less-than-charming social skills and smiled down at the patient. “He’s extremely talented as a surgeon.”
“He’d better be,” the older woman said, shooting Dr. Markson a dubious stare. The woman was a frequent flier in the ER with her dicey insurance situation. Normally thin, tonight Ms. Lovelace looked downright gaunt. From her pinched expression and messy, gray-streaked hair, Emma wondered if she’d been neglecting herself. The woman had no one to care for her; she was in her eighties and not married, nor did she have any children.
While Thad poked and prodded the woman’s ankles, Emma tried to discover more about her home situation. “Do you have groceries delivered, Ms. Lovelace? Should I call Meals on Wheels for you?”
“Child, I have all the food I need.” The older woman waved Emma off, her attention laser-focused on Dr. Markson. “What kind of doctor are you again?”
Emma bit back a smile. “He’s a heart surgeon.”
“Cardiothoracic surgeon,” Thad corrected from the end of the bed.
After giving him a look, Emma continued. “He’s a specialist who’s here to evaluate your heart. Based on your symptoms tonight it sounds like you’re having problems again?”
“Lord, yes,” Ms. Lovelace huffed. “And I’m so tired all the time.”
Thad gave a curt nod. “Fatigue is normal. Three plus pitting edema bilaterally.” He next moved to the patient’s chest, using his stethoscope to listen to her breathing.
“Damn, son!” Ms. Lovelace scowled up at him. “Warn a lady about your cold hands, why don’t ya?”
This time Emma coughed to cover her laugh. Leave it to the elderly to tell it like it was.
“What about water, Ms. Lovelace?” Emma asked, walking to the keyboard in the corner to pull up the patient’s file and enter the vitals Thad gave her. “Last time you were in, I believe the resident had ordered you to drink at least sixty-four ounces a day.”
“Well, I’m not.” The older woman sighed. “I mean, I do drink when I’m thirsty, but then I have to go to the bathroom more and it’s hard for me to get around. Plus, I’m not sleeping well at night, so sometimes I fall asleep during the day and miss meals. Which is just as well because the charity group that used to bring me food every month is low on donations, so they can only come every other month now. Sometimes I catch my neighbor when he goes to work but his hours are odd and I don’t always get him.”
Emma typed all that in, along with the other findings Thad called out to her like they’d been a team forever.
“And when did the breathing issues worsen?” Thad asked, straightening at last.
“Two nights ago,” Ms. Lovelace said. “At first, I thought it was bronchitis messing with my lungs again, but this morning I couldn’t catch my breath.”
Thad walked out of the room without another word, leaving Emma to make apologies before chasing after him.
As she hurried down the hall, Emma didn’t miss the looks both she and Thad received from the staff, including Emma’s best friend, another nurse named Danielle. Emma had told Dani about the project and her plans to recruit Dr. Markson. Now though, she was regretting letting her bestie in on the secret, based on Dani’s too-inquisitive stare.
“What are your orders, Dr. Markson?” Emma asked once they’d stopped at the nurses’ station again.
“The immediate goal is to reestablish adequate perfusion and oxygen delivery to the patient’s organs,” he said, as if just now noticing that Emma was there. Laser focus. It’s what made him such a brilliant surgeon, and such a pain in the butt to wrangle. “Prop the patient’s head up, give her oxygen, morphine if she’s in pain, IV Lasix and enalapril, along with some nitrates and digoxin for the slight arrhythmia I detected on exam. If that doesn’t work, we’ll look at more drastic interventions.”
“Drastic measures?” Emma only knew the patient through the ER, but still she cared.
“Yes.” He washed his hands in the sink nearby while Emma typed the orders into the computer. “If it turns out her kidneys are failing, then we’ll need to handle that issue as well.”
Emma swallowed hard. Kidney failure would mean dialysis, which would mean regular trips to a clinic and more burden on poor Ms. Lovelace. She was so caught up in her thoughts, she didn’t even realize he’d come up behind her until he spoke, his warm breath near her ear making her shiver.
“I don’t expect it’s that bad though,” he said, his voice low and deep, intimate, for her ears only. “Also, thank you for assisting me in there, Emma.”
“You’re welcome,” she squeaked out past her constricted vocal cords, turning slightly to look at him over her shoulder. He was close, so close that if there hadn’t been people around and she’d been braver, she could’ve risen on tiptoe and kissed him. He smiled then, teeth even and white, lips soft and sinfully sexy, and...
Oh, boy.
Emma turned back around fast, cheeks hot and mouth dry. “I’ll keep you updated on the patient’s progress.”
“Perfect.” Thad walked away, seemingly oblivious to the fact he’d just rocked Emma’s world. “See you at three fifteen, Nurse Trudeau.”
But unfortunately, fate had other ideas, because the busy ER got busier and Emma and Thad were thrown together again on a case, this time an overweight man with a sharp tightness in his chest. When she’d offered to have one of the residents take the case instead, Thad had brushed her off.
“I’m the only one in my department, and I like to stay busy,” he said, like that covered it. As far as Emma knew, Thad normally avoided her department like an Ebola outbreak, but suddenly he was around today. A lot. With her. She didn’t want to think too hard about why that was occurring because honestly, they were short-staffed and could use all the help they could get today. She and Thad worked on the obese patient, doing an EKG, which showed left ventricular hypertrophy and a possible blockage. They stabilized the man while awaiting the results of his cardiac enzyme tests.
“I’ve read your chest X-ray, Mr. Trotter,” Thad said to the patient about twenty minutes later. “And your heart is enlarged. Part of that is due to your high blood pressure and congestive heart failure, but you still shouldn’t have the chest pain. One of the heart enzymes in your blood, called troponin, is elevated, suggesting your heart muscle isn’t getting enough oxygen. So—” he turned then to Emma “—let’s get the patient moved up to the cardiac-care unit for closer observation. And schedule a cardiac catheterization in the morning. That way, if there are any blockages, I can repair them immediately.”
Emma prepared the transfer information while Thad answered questions from the man’s wife. By then it was nearly time for Emma’s break and their meeting. She finished up with Mr. Trotter and his wife before clocking out and going downstairs to the basement cafeteria with Thad to discuss the carnival plans in private.
She settled at a table in the corner to wait for Thad while he got his drink and pulled out her phone to take notes on their project updates. When he finally sat down, though, he had a whole tray of food.
He put a napkin on her lap, then looked up at her. “What? It’s time for me to eat and I didn’t want to be rude by doing it in front of you. So I got enough for two. Wasn’t sure what you liked. Vegetarian? Gluten free? Pescatarian? Vegan? There’s a bit of everything.”
“Oh. Um.” She shook her head. “I’m not on any special diet, but thanks. I guess.”
“You’re welcome.” His voice once again stroked against her skin like velvet and Emma battled another shudder of awareness from rippling through her. They were here to discuss their progress on the carnival, not for her to drool all over him. She sat back and refocused on her notes rather than her inappropriate attraction to Thad.
“Here.” He passed her an unopened bag of pita chips before digging into his chicken Caesar salad. “Eat those.”
“I’m not really hungry,” she said, setting the bag aside.
“What time did your shift start today?” he asked between bites of food.
“Seven this morning. Why?”
“And when did you last eat?”
Emma had to think about that for a second. “Dinner last night. But I had a whole burger and fries, so I’m still full.”
He snorted, then shook his head. “You need to take the same level of care with yourself as you do for others.”
“I...” Emma frowned. She took care of herself. She ate well, or tried to, between her busy work schedule and Karley’s school activities. And she certainly got enough exercise running around the ER all day. Defensive, she tried again to get their meeting back on track. “We’re here to talk about the project.”
“Do you always do that?”
“What?”
“Deflect away from yourself?” Thad wiped his mouth on his napkin, then narrowed his gaze. “You don’t like being in the spotlight.”
“I have no problem—”
“It wasn’t a question,” he said, cutting her off. “You prefer to let others shine. I see it very clearly.”
“Do you?” Heat prickling her face, she compressed her lips. The fact that his words had hit far too close to home only unsettled her more. Part of her wanted to tell him where to go and how to get off, but the other part of her felt far too exposed and raw. She didn’t like being the center of attention, it was true. But that was a good thing, right? Her sister didn’t agree. Karley was always on at Emma to stand up for herself, to toot her own horn, as Karley called it. Maybe if she did, Emma still wouldn’t be waiting for a promotion that was long overdue by any standards. But she felt more comfortable in the background. Not that she would let Thad Markson know it, though. She raised her chin and waggled her phone between her fingers. “I’ve only got twenty minutes left on my break and we have a lot to do. And if we’re going to talk about people’s life choices, why are you being so nice to me all of a sudden, bringing me lunch? Yesterday you wanted nothing to do with me.”
Thad gave a slight shrug, then ate another bite of salad. “I don’t like to eat alone.”
“But you live alone.”
“Everett is there.”
“Does your butler eat with you?” Emma found that hard to believe.
“Sometimes,” Thad said, surprising her. She couldn’t imagine the staid older man breaking protocol like that. “And there’s Baxter, too...”
And damn. Now he’d gone and made her feel sorry for him again. She resisted the urge to rub the sore spot on her chest over her heart as she pictured Thad eating alone at the granite island in his massive kitchen. Apparently, that old adage was right. Money wasn’t everything. Distracted, she reached for her bag of chips and accidentally brushed her hand against Thad’s free one on the table. Her nerve endings zinged, but this time Thad didn’t pull away fast as he had before. Their eyes met and she saw the same shocked awareness she felt in his gaze.
Oh boy.
Emma opened the chips and popped one in her mouth, looking away fast. And yeah. Fine. She was kind of hungry.
“How old are you?” Thad blurted out, his expression unreadable.
“Uh.” She frowned. “First of all, that’s rude. And second, twenty-eight. How old are you?”
“Thirty-six.” He pushed away his now-empty salad plate before starting on a bowl of yogurt with blueberries. “Have you always lived in New York?”
“Yes.” Emma exhaled slowly and ate another chip, losing hope for their planning session. “You?”
“Same.” He stared into his yogurt. “What made you want to be a nurse?”
“I didn’t have time for medical school.” She devoured a few more chips and at his curious look, continued. “My parents were killed in a car accident when I turned eighteen. I had a full scholarship for a pre-med program, but with my little sister to raise there was no time. And I had to bring in income to keep a roof over our heads. So I put aside my dreams of being a doctor and went to community college at night instead, so I could hold down a full-time job to support us. Took me longer than I wanted to graduate, but I got there. Got a job here at Manhattan West after graduation and worked my way up.”
Everyone reacted differently to her story. Some pitied her. Some applauded her gumption. Rarely, though, did Emma feel like anyone really saw her. Not her looks or skin color or tragic past, but her.
But when Thad looked at her, she felt seen. Right down to her core. So much so she had to fight not to squirm. It was uncomfortable and unsettling and more than a little unbelievable. Because of course it would be the one man she could never imagine herself with in a million years who finally got her.
Silence stretched taut between them until he finally changed the subject. “Tell me what you’ve done so far on your plans.”
While she told him about the vendor calls she’d made that morning, Thad wrestled with his rioting emotions. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected Emma’s life and past to be like, but he hadn’t been prepared for her truth. Even with his own mother dying when he was just ten from cancer and living with his cold, distant father afterward, Thad knew his life had been privileged.
But hearing her speak about losing her dream of becoming a doctor because of such horrible circumstances and the choices she’d been forced to make to survive, well... Thad swallowed hard. It was heartbreaking. Still, she managed to remain upbeat, optimistic, happy despite the scars grief inevitably left inside you. She’d persevered, finding new opportunities to move forward when others closed on her. She’d turned her troubles into triumphs and damn if Thad didn’t admire Emma for it.
And now she’d turned that same dogged determination to helping a sad, sick little boy get his dream come true. He remembered the image of little Ricky Lynch from the project brief, clutching the neck of his service dog. A dog who looked remarkably like Baxter. And that dog wasn’t the only thing he and Ricky had in common, either. Thad had spent more than enough time in hospitals as a kid. Scared and lonely and sick as they’d worked to regulate his diabetes. Sometimes, if he closed his eyes, he could still hear the beep of monitors and smell the disinfectant.
“Thad?” Emma asked, jarring him back to the present.
He started, blinking at her, the sound of his name on her lips still ringing in his ears—sweet and soft and a tad sultry. Deep inside him, something tightly coiled unfurled. “Yes?”
She looked concerned. “Everything okay?”
Thad resorted to his usual brusque business mode again, same as he always did when he felt too raw. “Fine. I think we need to consider the venue carefully, given we’re dealing with extremely ill children here. Can’t have them traipsing about outside in the snow and freezing temperatures. I need to do more research to find a suitable location.”
He kept his eyes locked on his yogurt bowl the whole time to avoid gazing at Emma like some smitten schoolboy. It was ridiculous. He was never besotted. He was a Markson, for God’s sake.
“Agreed,” she said, tapping her phone screen. “I thought about that, too. But it will need to be a pretty big venue for all the rides and booths and things. Plus have good ventilation and access to bathrooms. Not easy to find this close to Christmas.”
After considering that a moment, Thad said, “I’ve got my foundation on it. They should get back to me soon with a report.” At her expectant look, his pulse tripped. He’d grown up seeing his father throw his financial weight around and the consequences of that with his shady real estate deals had not been good. People had lost their homes, their life savings, because of his father. Thad was hesitant to do anything even remotely similar to his father’s, using money and influence to push things through he wanted, but this was for a good cause and Emma had him fired up. “And I’ll make some calls too. See if I can move them along any faster.” He finished his yogurt, then stacked his things back on the tray. “I’ll try and coordinate the mechanics of the rides as well, since you already started on the vendor list. What should we get? Ferris wheel, Scrambler, fun house? Maybe a bouncy house or fun slide?”
“A Ferris wheel might be hard to fit indoors.” Emma practically beamed at him now and Thad found himself enchanted. “Maybe something smaller. Like a carousel?”
“Is that your favorite ride?” He wasn’t sure why he’d asked, but it seemed important he know.
“It is.” Her bright smile faltered before she looked away. “I remember riding one with my parents as a kid. Everyone was so happy and carefree.”
He studied her wistful expression, her smooth skin and lovely dark eyes and those lips, so soft and kissable and...
Whoops. No.
Thad shoved those thoughts from his head and forced himself to get up and throw his trash away instead before they headed back to work. At the elevators, Emma yawned and stretched, her blue scrub top riding up slightly to reveal a sliver of bare skin at her waist. Thad looked away fast, throat tight.
“I think we got a good start,” he said, his voice gruff to his own ears.
“We did.” The elevator dinged and Emma stepped on board, holding the door for him. “I’ll text you with our next meeting time?”
“Yes. Good.” He cleared his throat, clasping his hands behind his back and staring straight ahead. “And thank you for helping me last night in my kitchen.” Uncomfortable heat climbed his neck from beneath the starched collar of his dress shirt. “I look forward to your text.”
The elevator dinged and the doors opened on the first floor. Emma got off, then turned to look at him. “You’re welcome, about the kitchen thing last night. And thanks for the chips.”
Neither moved. Thad held the doors until they beeped.
“So—” Emma stared.
“Maybe—” Thad said at the same time.
Both laughed. Then Thad said, “You go first.”
“I was thinking we should meet Ricky in person. Tell him what we’re planning and see if he has any more ideas we should incorporate. Maybe one day next week?” Her cheeks flushed a pink and she stared down at her toes. “If you’re available.”
“Yes.” He cleared his throat. “I’m free on Wednesday around lunchtime.”
“Good. Me, too.” Thad felt her answering grin like the sun breaking through a cloudy day. “Next Wednesday it is.”