part0020

Natalie was sitting with Fi, Rocky, and Dad when Ellie turned up for the Monday night pub quiz. She’d made it. Ellie had opened The Ultimate Scoop on Saturday, and had promised free ice cream from noon to two. Sure enough, word had got out and queues had been around the block. They’d kept up all weekend and had still been there today.

Natalie gave her a wave, then braced for Dad’s reaction. He’d been fiddling with his phone, but as far as she could tell he hadn’t been placing bets. She couldn’t worry about that now.

Ellie pulled up at the table. “Does anyone need a drink?”

Fi nodded. “I’ll have another beer if you’re offering.”

Ellie went to the bar and chatted with Helen, the quizmaster, like they were old friends. A frisson of something ran up Natalie’s spine, but she dismissed it. She imagined many heads were swayed by the fact Helen was an Oxford professor, had a flash sports car and was easy on the eye. Plus, she had that whole sexy academia look going on, with upturned collars and a confident swagger. Ellie wouldn’t go for Helen. Would she?

Natalie remembered spotting Ellie in here on Blind Date night. How she’d wanted the world to swallow her up. Now, she couldn’t imagine her life without the Knap sisters, who’d brought sweetness to her life. It felt like they’d always been around.

Dad leaned over and tickled Rocky’s cheek as he sat in Fi’s lap. “So what’s going on in your life, niece of mine? Any man action to tell me about?”

Nat tried not to scowl at Dad’s casual enquiry about her cousin’s love life. He could do it when it involved a man and a woman, but not when it was to do with her. As if to back up her point, Ethan and Jen walked in. Jen was really showing now. They both waved as they always did, and Natalie pressed down a sigh. It wasn’t their fault.

To Dad and most of the village, she’d always be the one who changed sides. The one with the ex-husband. But not with Ellie. Natalie liked that clean slate. With Ellie, she could be the real her, the person she was inside. Not somebody’s image of who she used to be, which is what Dad was clinging on to.

“None at all, Keith. I had to kick the last one to the kerb when he hated on Rocky. Not cool.” She paused. “Anyhow, I’ve been thinking I might be pansexual and try a woman next time. Keep my options open. It’s all the rage.” Fi gave Dad a butter-wouldn’t-melt smile.

Dad, in turn, nearly coughed up his drink. “Right,” he replied, his cheeks turning pink. Something flashed up on his phone and he turned it over, downed his drink and got up. Where was he going? If this was to do with what Fi had just said and Ellie turning up, Natalie wasn’t standing for it.

“The quiz is about to start, Dad.” She tried to keep her voice under control as Ellie sat back down with a white wine and Fi’s beer.

“Sorry.” Dad stuffed his phone in his pocket, picking up his jacket. “Something’s come up. Enjoy yourselves — you can cope without me.”

Natalie put a hand on his arm. “What’s come up? You live in Upper Chewford, you work with your sister. You don’t have things come up .” It was true. He never did.

But Dad shrugged off her hand. “Maybe it’s time that changed, don’t you think? I’m allowed a life, too.” He paused, his gaze resting on her, then shook his head. “I have to go.”

Natalie sat back, flattened. He may as well have just slapped her. She turned to Fi. “What just happened?”

Fi’s face was creased. “I think, for the first time in his life, Uncle Keith got a bit annoyed. Did he even do that when your mum left him?”

Ellie was following this like a tennis match, her head turning inches right, then left.

“Not that I remember.” Natalie folded her arms as Josie tapped the microphone and announced the quiz was starting in two minutes. She didn’t have time to go after him or think about it now. She’d deal with it tomorrow, when he’d calmed down. “Families.” She turned to Ellie. “Are your parents the same?”

Ellie shrugged. “They live in Dubai, so I wouldn’t know. They weren’t so keen on the whole parenting thing. At least your dad is still around. Count yourself lucky.”

Fi left when the quiz was finished, just after Rocky peed on another chair leg and then got into a fight with the much larger pub dog, Winston. There was only ever going to be one winner of that particular contest, but nobody had mentioned that to Rocky. Natalie told Fi it was her fault for calling her dog Rocky, making him think he was a prize fighter. Still, she was impressed with Fi’s commitment; her cousin hadn’t put this much effort into a relationship in years.

Natalie and Ellie had a final drink after the quiz, before leaving The Golden Fleece together. The late April sky was dark overhead, but the air still clutched the optimism of nearly summer in its hands. Ellie steered Natalie to one of the wooden picnic tables in the pub garden by the river. She sat on top of it, tapping beside her.

“You want to sit for a minute? It’s nice here in the moonlight with the stars up above. I could never see stars in London, but it’s a different story here.”

“No wi-fi, but we do get stars.” Natalie brushed down her jeans as she sat next to Ellie, their hips touching. The contact warmed her.

“It’s a compromise I can live with.”

They were silent for a few seconds before Natalie spoke. “I saw you chatting with Helen at the bar. Do you know her?” She gripped the wooden table under her.

Ellie shook her head. “No, but I’ve seen her in the window of her cottage, working on her laptop. I always wondered what she was doing. She always looks so… enthralled. Like she’s exactly where she wants to be. I remember thinking I’d like to be like that with whatever I was doing. She’s a professor at Oxford.”

Natalie relaxed. “Who knew academia could be so enthralling?”

Ellie nodded. “I know. I asked her if she was writing a research paper that was going to be printed in an academic magazine. She was a bit vague, but I guess that’s what they do.”

“Do you think The Ultimate Scoop is going to keep you as enthralled? You’re not already thinking your life in London was far easier?”

Ellie smiled, turning her head. The openness in her eyes took Natalie’s breath away.

“If you’d have told me a year ago this was what I’d be doing, I’d have laughed in your face. I had a serious job that earned serious money. But I was also seriously miserable.” She shrugged. “I’m not saying the first three days didn’t have their snags. The main one when we ran out of chocolate ice cream. Thank god the supplier is local and took pity on me with an emergency delivery. But you know what? I rolled with it. There were other flavours to choose from so it wasn’t the end of the world.”

Ellie shook her head. “Whoever would have thought I’d be so calm and measured?” She tapped her index finger on her chest. “Me, who was perpetually stressed and used to pop headache pills like sweets. Plus, it turns out, I don’t mind dealing with the public. Who the fuck knew that? All this time I’ve been hiding behind my spreadsheets, when really, I should have been a barista at Costa Coffee.”

“Maybe that’s an ambition you can fulfil next year.”

Ellie let out a hoot of laughter. “It’s good to have options.” She paused, turning her head. “What about you? Everything okay with your dad?”

Natalie’s insides curdled at the mention of him. “Things are fine. Well, you saw, they’re a bit weird. I always thought we had a close relationship, especially after Mum left. But something’s changed and I can’t work out what.”

Ellie put a hand on Natalie’s back and stroked up and down.

Natalie shivered, fiddling with the zip on her jacket. If you put a heat map on her right this minute, it would all be heading to her centre. She stared out at the river, concentrating on the moonlight on the water. Its ripples pretty much mimicked what was going on inside her.

“I’m sure he’ll say when he wants to.”

That sounded familiar, because it was how Natalie dealt with things, too. “I know.” She paused. “It must be rough not having your parents around.”

Ellie shrugged, taking her hand away. “Not really. They’ve been gone over 20 years, so Red and I are used to it. I’m glad I’ve got her, though. You’re an only child, right?”

“Yes, although Fi and I are like sisters. We were brought up together, so we sort of are.”

They were silent for a few moments, watching other pub-goers crunch their feet over the car park’s gravel.

“Have you been doing more running?”

Ellie nodded. “I have. Now I know where to go, it makes it so much easier. That’s thanks to you.” She paused. “In fact, a lot of the ease of this move has been thanks to you. That was something I never thought after I pushed you into the river, or after you shouted at me for my parking.”

Nat took in Ellie’s grin. “In my defence, it was terrible parking. But you’ve redeemed yourself since through your community spirit and your willingness to include my ice-cream flavour on your first list.”

Ellie raised a single eyebrow. “That was very nice of me, wasn’t it?”

“You’re a nice person.” Natalie gulped as their gaze connected once more. The moment was a little too intense, and she wasn’t sure where it was heading, or if she was ready.

She jumped up and offered Ellie her hand. “Shall we make tracks?”

Ellie took her hand and gave it a slight squeeze before letting it go. “Can we walk down a few bridges before we cross?” Ellie turned as she asked. “I haven’t seen the river with such great moonlight and so few people.”

They did just that. As they walked side by side, Natalie stepped onto the grassy bank of the river to let four other late-night walkers past on the path.

“Do you know anyone who lives in these houses?” Ellie pointed left, to the rows of riverside cottages lining their route. All were built in the traditional Cotswolds stone, with small front gardens and traditional wooden slatted gates.

“Only Fi. She’s got one at the other end of the river. My dad lives up past the old mill, but his place isn’t on the river. That adds another zero to the price tag.”

“Your aunt doesn’t have one?”

Natalie shook her head. “She’s got a house on the distillery grounds. These places would be too small for her. Yolanda likes the grander things in life.”

“What about you?”

“I’m happy with my flat for now. I’m not my aunt. I don’t need much to live my best life. I just want to enjoy my job, have a comfortable place to live and, eventually, someone to share it with. Two out of three ain’t bad.” Natalie looked up into the granite sky, illuminated by the full moon. She hadn’t read about it being a supermoon tonight, but it looked like something from a children’s book. As if she could reach out and touch it. But what she really wanted to do was reach out and touch Ellie. She didn’t dare look at her, for fear of what her face might betray. That she wouldn’t mind Ellie being the one to share things with.

They were approaching the old mill. Ellie turned towards the final footbridge and Natalie followed.

When Ellie got to the centre, she stopped, tipping her head up to admire the moon.

Natalie paused beside her, doing the same. The only sounds were the gentle ripple of the clear water as it passed beneath them, along with her heartbeat pulsing in her ears. She glanced left and right, but couldn’t see another soul.

“You know, it’s weird being here. I never thought I’d be a country bumpkin and yet here I am. With an ice-cream shop in a Cotswold village. What’s more, I feel like I’m home. Like I belong. I never felt like that in London, no matter how many parties I went to, how much I drank, how many people I met. I always felt out of my depth, like I was a square peg in a round hole. But here, I feel like I’ve got space to breathe, time to think.” She turned, looking directly at Natalie. “Most of all, people to share it with. People I’ve only just met.”

Natalie didn’t break their gaze, but moved a step closer to Ellie. “Sometimes it’s not about the length of time you’ve known someone. It’s how they make you feel.”

She took another step, until she was standing in front of Ellie. Then she took Ellie’s hand in hers, still holding her gaze. She didn’t stop to think about what she was doing, she simply did what felt right. What felt natural. What felt like the perfect fit for both of them. “You make me feel alive. Like I’ve stepped into a different universe. Not the one where everyone knows me and has since I was small. With you, I can finally be me.”

Ellie’s eyelids flickered as she took in Natalie’s words. Then, slowly, Ellie brought Nat’s fingers to her lips and kissed them, one by one.

Desire slid down Natalie’s skin.

Without another word, they moved to each other. Ellie snaked an arm around Natalie’s waist. It was the perfect move in the perfect moment. Was there anyone around to see this? Natalie wasn’t going to look, because she didn’t want to pause. She’d put her life on pause for far too long. Ever since she’d come out, she’d been tiptoeing around, doing everything she could to make everyone else feel comfortable with her. No more. She had to live the life she wanted. Not the one Dad wanted. Or the village wanted. That included Ellie. More importantly, kissing Ellie, on this bridge, in the moonlight. Right now.

Luckily, Ellie seemed to have the same idea, which was handy, seeing as her lips were six inches higher. She leaned in, and within seconds, Ellie’s lips were pressing down on her own, and they were glorious. For once, Natalie wasn’t thinking, she was just doing. In every other area of life she was a doer. She needed to bring it into her love life, clearly. She hadn’t kissed any other woman in the open air of Chewford. But now, she was casting aside her old fears, and embracing the new. Embracing Ellie.

Ellie was a breath of fresh air in the village, Natalie knew that already. But with Ellie’s lips on hers, she was breathing new life into Natalie by the second. Natalie held tight, swooning as Ellie’s lips moved over hers.

When Ellie slipped her tongue gently into her mouth, Natalie’s heart reared up with delight. The pleasure was disorientating. A low hum in her belly; a tingle danced across her skin. Her body swayed in the moonlight as Ellie’s sure kiss carried her away from Upper Chewford, away from the Cotswolds, and into a fairytale where she imagined all sorts of scenarios. All from a single kiss.

Imagine if they slept together. Natalie’s head might explode.

She moved her hand to Ellie’s back, pulling her close, wanting every part of their bodies near. As their breasts pressed together, Natalie groaned into Ellie’s mouth, feeling it everywhere. Were they lit up like a golden couple on the bridge? Were a troupe of dancers about to riff in formation, celebrating this moment? That’s what should happen. A plaque should be erected after tonight: Natalie and Ellie kissed here, 2019 .

After what seemed like a minute but also hours, Natalie pulled back, her eyes never leaving Ellie.

Ellie quirked her lips into a smile. “If I’d have known stopping on a bridge would have this effect on you, I’d have done it weeks ago. That’s about how long I’ve been thinking about kissing you.”

“Really?” That was news. “This bridge, too. The bridge where it all started and I got soaked.”

“I’m not sorry that happened. It made you notice me.”

Natalie laughed, breathing Ellie in a little more. “I could hardly fail.”

Some people were approaching on the bridge, breaking their private moment. It had to happen, but it still made Natalie sigh. Damn real life and it’s predictability.