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Bad things do happen, how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have — life itself.
~Walter Anderson
Everything sucked.
Life.
School.
Love.
The only thing I had going for me was football. Sunday was the press conference and I couldn’t wait. All the analysts had pegged our opponent as Tri-Gold State University Eagles and I was counting on their predictions. They had a twelve and two record, making them a perfect match for PHU. Playing at the Lone Star Bowl would be a dream come true.
The door to the apartment opened and Josh stomped in. “Woo!” He dumped his backpack on the floor. “I’m done! Yeah!” He made a fist and jerked his arm back.
I turned and shot him a sloppy smile. “Congrats, man. Once semester left.” I held up a half-empty bottle of whiskey. “Cheers.”
“What the fu—?” He slammed the door. “Are you done with finals, too?”
“Nope.” I shook my head. “I have one on Monday and one on Wednesday.” I retracted my hand when he didn’t take the bottle.
“Dude, what the hell are you doing?” Josh grabbed the bottle before I could take another sip.
I shrugged. “Celebrating for you and the bowl game.”
He eyed me suspiciously as he sat on the coffee table in front of me. “Bullshit.” He took a whiff of the bottle. “Whew. If you’re going to get drunk at least drink something better than this shit.”
“It’s all I could find.” I nodded toward the kitchen.
Josh set the bottle next to him. Resting his arms against his legs, he leaned forward. “So, you gonna tell me what’s going on?”
“What?” I shrugged. “I’m good.”
He shook his head, not buying my lies. “What did you do now?”
I crossed my arms behind my head and leaned back. “Nothing, man. I’m telling you.”
“You just felt like downing half a bottle of cheap whiskey for the hell of it?”
Closing my eyes, I tried not to think of the real reason. I hated being weak. Letting go of Lexi should have been easy. Nothing to it. But it wasn’t and I hated that I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I had to do something, anything, to stop thinking about her. Drinking was the first thing that came to mind.
“Yeah, why not,” I slurred, feeling the room spin around me. The liquor had hit and I was drunk. But I didn’t care. I liked how it numbed my head, making me forget all the incessant pain in my chest. A pain I never felt before and I was sure had something to do with love. Love sucked. I would never fall for it again.
“Okay, if everything’s good, let’s go get something to eat. Shelby’s on her way so call Lexi and let’s go.”
My eyes shot open. “Not happening.” I tried to stand and then fell back against the cushions. If everything would stay still then I could get up and leave.
“Why not?” He pressed me for an answer. “Huh?”
I dragged my hands over my face, wiping away the sweat. “Because we’re done.”
Josh grunted. “Since when?”
I brought my arm up to my face and stared carefully at my watch. “Since twenty-three hours and seventeen minutes ago.”
Josh laughed.
“What’s so funny about that?” I allowed my arm to fall to the couch, resisting the urge to punch him in the face for laughing.
“You’re drunk off your ass and you can still count. It’s crazy.”
I chuckled. “That’s because I rock when it comes to numbers.”
“Yeah, man, you do.” Josh patted my leg. “So, what happened between you and Lexi?”
I cringed. I wasn’t prepared to explain, even though the answer was easy. But nothing in life was easy. There were no happy endings. No precious moments. Life gave you everything you deserved. Shit. And then more shit. And when you thought you couldn’t handle any more, it laughed and threw even more shit.
I rolled my shoulders, trying to work out the ache in my chest. I hated it and wanted it to go away. Liquor. I needed more. I leaned forward to grab the bottle.
“No.” Josh snatched the bottle from the table before I could get it. “You’ve had enough already.”
“Come on, man. Just one more drink.” I shuddered at my own words. Every time I slipped, I would always say, Just one more hit. C’mon, what’s one more?
And then I felt that hunger. It filled my body, salivating every gland in my mouth. I longed for the taste of it. The rush. The thrill. Nothing felt as good as the smoke filling my lungs and funneling through my blood as every muscle relaxed. The calmness it brought, erasing every hurt and bad memory with each puff.
No!
I refused. My demons wouldn’t drag me back down that path. I’d come too far. Not now. I had a bowl game ahead of me. Weed was not the answer for my pain. Not this time.
Josh took a swig and then wiped his mouth. “Not until you tell me what happened.”
My head fell forward and I stared him, trying to focus while the room tilted from side to side. “She’s too good for me and you know it.”
“Aw, man.” Josh moved from the coffee table to the couch. “Who told you that lie?”
I tried to grab the bottle from his hand, but he refused to let go. “It’s no lie. It’s the truth.”
“I disagree. She’s perfect for you and she’s exactly what you need.”
“Whatever, dude.” I reclined against the couch. “She’s like this perfect angel, the epitome of what every guy dreams about and wants.” Images of Lexi danced around in my head and I wanted to call her so bad. “She deserves so much better, so much more. Not a fuck up like me, Josh.”
“Raven, you need a good girl. Not one of these hoes who are just in it for the money.”
Josh was right about one thing. Lexi wasn’t part of the fantasy wife’s football club. She wasn’t after me because she hoped I landed with a pro team. Her goal wasn’t to be my trophy wife. She liked me for who I was — with or without titles. She had her own goals and aspirations. That made her different from most of the girls caught in my trap and that’s what I liked about her. She was definitely an upgrade.
“You’re right about that, but come on, look at who she was engaged to. Collin Norris. The poster child for PHU athletics. How the hell can I compete with that?”
“You don’t have to.” Josh took another drink from my bottle. “That battle is over. You already won, dude.” He handed me the whiskey. “You should drink to that.”
And I did. Maybe he was right, but then again, I wasn’t what she deserved. “Yeah, but she’s so innocent. So perfect. And I’m like the thug from the opposite side of the tracks. I know her parents want the best for her and it’s not me.”
I took another swig and then Josh took the bottle and swallowed a gulp of the amber liquid. “How do you know that? Have you met her parents?”
“No, not yet.” Though I didn’t want to admit it, I was scared to meet them. I reclaimed the bottle once again and took several swallows.
“Then you shouldn’t worry about that right now. Just get to know her, like I told you. Spend time together, like you’ve been doing. Let the relationship grow.”
“It will never work.” I pinched the bridge of my nose, feeling the numbness take over. “I’ll just bring her down with me and you know it. It’s only a matter of time before I fall again.”
“What?” Josh snatched the bottle from my hand. “I don’t think so. I’m not going to let that happen.” He shot off the couch and headed to the kitchen.
“What are you doing?” I stumbled my way to the bar.
Josh was emptying the bottle in the sink.
“Why are you doing that?” I tried to stop him, but it was too late. The liquor was gone.
He turned on the water. “You’re done getting drunk. Time to sober up and face your demons. We’ve got a championship to win.”
“Whatever, dude.” I collapsed on the barstool. “I’ve been battling them forever. They’re not going anywhere.”
He opened the fridge and took out two tall bottles of water. “Drink up.”
I rolled my eyes as I broke the seal to the cap. I chugged half the bottle and burped. “Happy?”
With both hands on the counter, he leaned forward. “Look, man, I don’t want to see you slip back to the wrong side. You’ve come too far.” He pointed at me and then himself. “We’ve worked too hard for you to return to the pits. I won’t let you get pulled back under, not again.”
I continued drinking the water. “Thanks, man, I appreciate that. But the truth is...I can only be strong for so long. It’s not easy.”
“Damn it!” He pounded the counter with his fist. “That’s not the right answer,” he pointed his finger at me, “and you know it.”
“Sorry, man, but it’s the truth.”
He shook his head and ran a hand down his face. His temples pulsed and his nostrils flared with each breath he took. “You’re better than that and you know it. You’re The Raven, best damn quarterback in the South Central Conference. Hell, the entire college football conference.” He raised his hands in the air.
I threw my head back and laughed. “If that’s the true, why aren’t the scouts coming after me? Huh?” He glared at me, at a loss for words. “Because no one wants a guy like me with off- field issues. And you know it.” I pointed to him.
“Then change, damn it!” He pounded the counter again. “You’ve got too much at stake not to. Can’t you see that?”
I crunched the plastic bottle in my palm. He had a point. I was The Raven. Fast and light-footed. Taking flight across the field like a bird — a raven. That innate instinct made me nearly untouchable. The saying was they had to touch me first before they could tackle me. And not many could. That’s what made me a damn good quarterback.
“I do...and I will,” I whispered under my breath. “I refuse to fail.”
“Damn right!” Josh lilted. “You’re a Dragon. You play with passion and pride. You fight to the end.”
The words circled around in my head, igniting a fire in the pit of my stomach.
I am a Dragon.
I play with passion and pride.
I fight to the end!
And I would fight to the end. I would win this battle against my demons. No girl, not even Lexi, would pull me back into the depths of despair. I was better than that.
“Yeah, man!” I pounded my chest, feeling the adrenaline rise within me. Josh was right. I couldn’t throw all of this away over some girl. What the fuck was wrong with me? The team was relying on me. We had a bowl game to win. And we would win it.
“That’s what I’m talking about.” Josh high-fived me. “Now, either call Lexi and get back with her, or move on, dude. No time for crying over pussy.”
He was right, again. I dug my phone out of my pocket and scrolled through my contacts. I stopped when I saw Beth’s name. The Raven was back.
***
It didn’t take me long to resort back to my old ways — at least when it came to women. They were as familiar as the turf beneath my feet. After a memorable night with Beth, and another night with Macy, and the next night with her and her roomies, I was as good as new. Who could blame me? When you got it — you got it.
Sunday was the best day ever. The press conference went smoothly and I talked up PHU, convincing every reporter and fan we would win the bowl game. And we would. We had the right skills, the right players, and the burning desire to set the Arizona Eagles on fire. We’d send them back, bald and featherless. Because that’s what the Dragons did. We destroyed our opponents.
I aced my finals, too. Thanks to Beth, she gave me a thorough lesson in History, not to mention other things as well. Yes, I was back and stronger than ever before. That’s what I kept telling myself anyway. Deep down, I felt the guilt burning, and silently, I was hurting. Because despite all the attention and sex, it wasn’t with the person I wanted the most.
Lexi.
I’d just have to keep going, like Josh said. Keep moving on, from one girl to the next. I stared in the mirror, applying gel to my hair. I cracked a smile, thinking of all the women who would be at the Sigma Chi party. The grin quickly vanished when I thought about Lexi.
For the past week, I’d managed to avoid her. No texts, no phone calls from either of us. I was positive she’d either gone back to Collin or moved on. And it killed me every day. But I had to get over her and the only way to do that was through alcohol and sex. And there would be plenty of that tonight.
The party was packed with students and even some people who didn’t attend PHU. But I didn’t care. That just meant more women, and the dessert tray had every variety available. From sweet to rich and black to white, they were all there, turning up the heat level by twenty-five degrees.
Macy was there with her roomies and I hung out with them for a while. I told them I’d find them later and they assured me if I didn’t, they would. And by the hunger circling in their eyes, I knew I had left them famished for more of me. I headed to a back room and played beer pong with a few of the guys. Shawn and I were on one team, and Quinton and Marcel on the other. The score was six to three and we were winning.
After a victorious win, I headed outside. A couple of guys were filling up a kiddie pool with blue Jell-O. Imagining what was going to take place, I made a note to come back outside and check it out later. Last year they had banana pudding wrestling and by the end of the night, I was in the pool with all the women. It was sticky and slimy and tasty. I’d do it again.
“What’s the rush?” I asked a couple of girls as they ran past me in their bikinis, screaming as the cold air hit them.
“We’re going to go play in Jell-O.” A cute blonde with huge boobs grabbed my hand. “Come with us.”
I laughed as I gave her body a full overview. The girl had deafening curves. “I will a little later. It’s kind of early to get sticky.” I winked.
She tilted her head to the side and gave me a girlish giggle. “If you say so, Raven.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be out there.” I ran my finger along her perfect jawline.
“And I’ll be waiting.” She shuffled out the door, keeping one eye on me the entire time.
Cheering and shouting came from the kitchen and I shouldered my way through the crowd. I craned my neck to see a girl lying on the kitchen table, wearing a black bikini. A guy had his mouth pressed to hers, taking a slice of lemon. Everyone ranted and raved as he sucked on the fruit.
“Yeah!” His hand shot up, spilling some of the beer in his cup.
“Hey, Raven, what’s up, man?” A guy with a Sigma Chi shirt patted me on the back.
“Doing good.” We shook hands and I search my mind trying to recall his name. Nothing surfaced.
“Want a shot?”
I gave a half shrug. “Yeah, sure.”
“Raven’s next,” he shouted.
Everyone turned around and cheered. I held up my beer and smiled. The crowd parted and I made my way to the front. The girl propped herself up on her forearms and smiled. “Hi, Raven, I’m Christine.”
I set my beer next to her. “Hi, Christine.”
“So, you want to do a body shot off me?” She gave her body a little shake.
“If you’ll let me.” I licked my lips, salivating at the alcohol, salt, and lemon trickling from her body.
“Oh, I’ll let you do more than that if you want.” She tossed her long, dark hair over her shoulder and reclined against the wood.
“Anything you say, Christine.”
“Start at the tattoo, Jess.” She informed the Sigma Chi with the bottle.
“You’ve got it.”
Using her thumbs, Christine lowered her bikini bottom stopping where her hair would have started. By the looks of it, she was bare. Oh yeah. Guys whistled and clapped. I squared my shoulders, ready to dig in. Jess poured a thin stream over the swirls of her tattoo spreading across her lower abdomen and then created a trail to her navel. He allowed it to fill, until the liquor ran off the sides. Then he continued making a path up her stomach and between her breasts, giving a final splash across her chest.
A whimper escaped her mouth and her body arched against the table.
“Steady now, Christine.” Jess grabbed a saltshaker and sprinkled granules across her plump breasts.
With her fingers, she spread it between her cleavage and the crowd went crazy.
And so did I.
Damn.
Looking at her made me so thirsty.
“Ready, man?”
“Hell yeah.” I took the shot glass from him and downed the tequila. Everyone yelled and clapped. “Lick, lick. Suck. Suck.”
My heart beat like a wild animal ready to devour its prey. I lowered my head between her legs and opened my mouth. I licked her tattoo, drawing all the liquor with the tip of my tongue. Christine moaned and her stomach quivered. I continued to her navel and slurped up the tequila. The crowd continued raving as I took my time, savoring every drop from her skin. I followed the trail up her stomach and between her breasts. Salt tinged my mouth as I glided my tongue through the narrow valley. The material was in the way, but I kept my hands pressed to the table, forbidding any further action on my part.
I glanced at her and her eyes glazed over. Her lungs heaved for air and her body writhed from my touch. She wanted me. She was falling into my trap, no question about it. I lowered my head and spread my tongue across her huge mounds, lapping up the last of the tequila and salt. Then I covered her mouth with mine, giving her a little tongue action as I slipped the slice of lemon in my mouth. Christine didn’t hold back. Her arms flung around my neck as she kept her lips pressed to mine. I kissed her as best as I could with a lemon wedge in my cheek. Whistles and hollering erupted in the air and we started laughing. She pulled her lips from mine and slowly dragged her hands down my chest.
Keeping my eyes on her, I sucked on the lemon and then tossed it in the empty shot glass.
“Damn.” Christine licked her lips and fingers. “That was the best body shot ever and I wasn’t the one doing it.”
I grinned and then whispered in her ear, “If you want to do it again, but in private, let me know.”
Christine bit her lower lip. “You bet I do.”
I winked at her. “Catch me at the end of the night.”
“You’ve got it.”
“I’m next!” The guy next to me hollered.
I picked up my beer and walked off, wiping my mouth on my sleeve. One shot like that was enough for a while. I adjusted my pants and made my way to the living room. Lights flashed and the walls thundered at the beat of the music. Bodies rubbed against each other, fighting for a place to dance. Sweat and funk lingered in the air, but no one seemed to care. I laughed at two girls going at it on the couch. I thought about yelling for them to get a room, but left them alone. I turned to see Shawn in the corner, talking to some girl.
“Hey, man, where’ve you been?” He motioned for me to join him.
I shuffled past a few people and sat next to him. “Doing body shots.”
“Where? I want to do one.” He started to get up, but the girl eyed him and he sat.
“In the kitchen, but there’s a long line and the tequila’s cheap. You’re not missing anything,” I lied. They were using top shelf liquor and Christine gave the best damn body shots. These Sigma Chi parties never disappointed.
“Hey, Raven, this is Cheyanne.” Shawn introduced the tall, beautiful girl wedged between his legs.
“Nice to meet you.” She stuck out her long, muscular arm, gripping my hand tightly.
I shook her hand. “Do you like to workout?”
She laughed. “Yeah and play basketball.”
I zeroed in on her wide eyes and big smile. “You’re Cheyanne Rivers.”
“Yes, that’s me.” She retrieved her hand and crossed her arms, showing off her well-defined biceps. My eyes traveled down her midsection, hoping to see some bare legs, but she had on jeans.
“Congrats on your win today. Man, you all are tearing it up this year. Six and two is damn good.”
“Thanks.” She continued smiling. “We’ve been working really hard.”
“It shows.” I motioned at the stool I was sitting on. “Do you want to sit down?”
“I’m good. Thanks.” She shook her head. “Hey, Shawn, I’m going to look for Chelsea. I’ll be back.”
“Yeah, okay.”
Cheyanne pushed her way through the crowd and I turned to Shawn. “How’d you meet her?”
“I had a class with her this semester. We worked on a project together.” He smiled and rubbed his chin.
“Oh, one of those projects.”
He laughed and elbowed me in the ribs. “Naw, man, it’s not like that. I respect her.”
“Uh huh. Just admit it. You can’t get—” I stopped midsentence when I saw Lexi enter the room, holdings hands with some guy. I’d seen him around before and knew he was a Sigma Chi, but I’d never met him. Instantly, my blood boiled.
“What’s wrong?” Shawn nudged me.
I kept my eyes fixed on the scrawny guy. “Lexi’s here.”
Shawn followed my gaze. “I guess she’s over you,” he snickered.
“Don’t, man.” I shook my head, tightening my fist. I needed to punch something, anything.
“You’re the one who told her you didn’t want to see her. What did you expect her to do?”
I crossed my arms, burying my fists against my chest. I had to keep calm. Shawn had a point. I dumped her after she begged me not to. I had no reason to be mad, but I was burning with rage. I didn’t like the way that guy was checking her out and I definitely didn’t like what she was wearing. On second thought, I loved the short, off-the-shoulder purple dress and black high heels that made her legs look sexy, but I didn’t want her wearing it around him.
“Hey, have you seen Shelby?” Josh appeared, looking pissed as usual.
I didn’t answer him. Just kept my eyes fixed on Lexi. Watching her every move.
Damn it! Why can’t I let her go?
“Um, I saw her earlier with Amber, but that was a while ago,” Shawn replied.
“Shit.” Josh peered over the crowd, searching for his girl. “I’ll never find her.”
“Text her.”
Josh pulled a phone from his back pocket. “I can’t. I have her phone.”
“What’s wrong?” Josh’s eyes darted to me. “Are you drunk?”
My eyes narrowed, as I pretended to blow the guy up with laser beams. “I wish.”
“Lexi’s here and she’s dancing with some guy,” Shawn informed Josh.
Josh turned around and stared into the mob of bodies. “Oh fuck, that’s Brian Levinson. He’s a Sigma Chi. Promise me you won’t start shit.” Josh tried to get my attention, but I refused to take my eyes off Lexi.
“Raven.”
“What?”
“You heard me. We need you for the game.”
I looked at him briefly. “Alright. I promise.”
“Besides, we don’t want to start a fight at their party. That would be...” Josh rambled, listing several reasons why beating Brian’s ass would be a bad idea. But I didn’t care. I wanted to grab the guy by his pretty brown hair and slam his face into the wall. I knew better. I took a few deep breaths, steadying the pounding in my chest.
“Okay. Okay.” I held up my hand, not wanting to hear anymore. “There’s Shelby.” I motioned with my head into the crowd. “She’s dancing with Delaney and Amber.”
“About damn time I found her.” Josh let out a sigh of relief. “I swear, she’s going to be the death of me.”
I snickered as Josh pushed his way through the crowd and handed Shelby her phone. He whispered something to her and I hoped it wasn’t about me. I didn’t want anything getting back to Lexi.
Cheyanne appeared with two beers in hand. She gave one to Shawn and he told her something. He turned to me and said, “Hey, I’ll be back.” I nodded, not paying him much attention. Before he walked off, he turned around and handed me his cold beer. “I think you need this more than me.”
“Thanks.” I took the red cup and he followed Cheyanne into the next room.
I kept a stiff posture as I watched Lexi and Brian dance and talk. She was so consumed by him that she hadn’t even noticed I was there. I think that bothered me the most. Then again, everything was pissing me off. They appeared to be having a great time, as if they were good friends. I hated that. I wanted to be the one talking and flirting with her. I hated that I kept holding on and didn’t know how to let go.
Why is this so hard?
The reason was evident. I still liked Lexi. And I wanted to be with her, but I couldn’t.
Damn it!
I couldn’t deny what I felt for her. The ache in my chest reminded me daily. Nothing I did made it better. The women...the alcohol. It was all temporary relief, because after they wore off, I was back to where I started. It sucked.
“Hi.” A group of women appeared in front of me, blocking my view.
“Hey, what’s up?” I cracked a half smile, trying not to be rude. I’d never seen these women before and I was positive they were beyond their college years, but they were still hot.
“I’m Iris and these are my friends, Barb, Jenn, Jessa, and Cheryl.”
“Hi, nice to meet you.” I pressed a hand on my thigh and took a deep breath. Intuition told me they were anxious to get caught in The Raven’s trap. “So are you all grads students?” I didn’t want to be impolite, but curiosity had the best of me.
A few of them laughed. “Um, no, not exactly,” Iris responded. She seemed to be the one in charge.
“More like big fans.” Barb smiled as she flipped her hair over her shoulder.
“Oh, I see.” I glanced over her shoulder, but Lexi wasn’t standing with Brian any longer. He was talking to a group of guys. My eyes quickly searched the room, but with all the women surrounding me, I couldn’t see.
“Yeah, we never miss a game.” Jenn adjusted the strap of her purse. In all the years I’d been to a frat party, I’d never seen a woman carry a big handbag. I guess she hadn’t been to a party in a while.
“We have season tickets.” Jessa shot me a cute smile. With her short, blonde hair and big blue eyes, she reminded me of Tinkerbell.
“Thanks for supporting PHU athletics. We appreciate it.”
“Sure.” She darted forward, landing in my lap after some guy bumped into her.
“You okay?” I caught Jessa with one arm, managing to keep my beer upright with the other.
“Yeah.” Her pale cheeks flashed bright red. “Sorry about that.”
“It’s alright,” I assured her. She took her time peeling her hands from my thighs, using her nails to graze my jeans. I took a sip of my beer, feeling the heat rise.
Iris moved closer, practically pushing Jessa out of the way. “So, we hear you’re damn good in bed.”
I coughed, spraying them with beer. “Sorry.” I wiped my mouth. “I wasn’t expecting that.”
A few of the women didn’t look too happy for having beer spat all over them, but they’d get over it. Jenn reached into her purse, pulling out a small packet of tissues. I guess big purses were handy.
“Are the rumors true?” Cheryl asked.
They waited anxiously for my response, forming a tighter circle around me. They eyed me from head to toe, like sex-starved animals. Cougars. These women were freaking cougars, maybe pumas. Shit. I had kept my MILF list to a limit, but these women were anxious to join. Barb kept inching closer to me and I swore she sniffed my shirt. I wished I wouldn’t have drowned myself in cologne because they were hot on my trail.
“Well?” Iris pressed me for an answer. “We want to find out for ourselves.”
My breath hitched in the middle of my throat. Not one, two, or three, but five women were ready for me to take them to bed.
How fucking lucky could I get?
Only I didn’t want to screw all of them.
The guilt start settling in and all I could think about was Lexi. She was the one I wanted. Not these pumas and cougars who were probably married with a few kids.
“Iris. I can’t do that.” I grinned, trying to let her down gently.
“Oh, yes, you can.” Her Spanish accent filtered through as she flipped her long, black hair. By her reaction, I knew this wasn’t going to be easy. Iris didn’t look like a woman who took no for an answer.
I was fucked.
“Well, if you can’t do that with her, then what about me?” Barb placed her hands on my chest, pawing at me. She was cougar, alright. A fierce one, too.
“Um...”
Barb backed away and I sucked in a shallow breath.
“How about you just take all of us?” Cheryl gave her boobs a nice shake. “I know you can do it.” She grabbed my beer and downed it.
Shit.
Not wanting to sound like a pussy, I had to man up. “I’ve never had five women in one night.” Pressing my hands to my thighs, I leaned forward. “But I can try.”
I was lying big time. I didn’t want to be with all five of them. I started looking around for Josh and Shawn, wishing they were here to help me. Never had I felt so helpless in my life, but these women were more than I could handle.
“Hell, baby, you don’t have to do anything. We’ll do all the work for you. All you need to do is just lay there.” Jenn eyed me like she was ready to attack.
“Well, it’s not that easy.” I shrugged, vying for an excuse. “I have to make sure I have enough energy, you know...so everything cooperates.”
“Whatever you need, just say it,” Iris purred like a kitten.
“Yes, we’ll give you anything you need.” Jessa’s blue eyes were hypnotic. Cat-like. Trying to lure me in, like a puma does its prey.
My skin crawled and I took a hard swallow. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Shelby and Amber pull Lexi on to the coffee table. I tried to keep my focus on what these women were telling me, but when I saw Shelby freaking Lexi, all my attention went to her. Shelby ground on Lexi, running her hands up and down her body. I looked for Josh, but he was nowhere in sight. Shelby was known for doing crazy things, not Lexi.
What’s gotten into her?
Lexi seemed stunned at first and then joined in on the obscene dance moves. With her back pressed to Shelby’s, she rubbed her body against hers, showing no shame. Her hands glided up and down Shelby’s bare legs, pushing up her micro-miniskirt so high, her bright pink panties were showing. Shelby pressed her cheek to Lexi’s and for a moment, I thought they were going to kiss. If these were any other girls, I probably would’ve been turned on, but not Lexi and Shelby.
What the hell happened to my sweet Lexi? She had to be drunk.
“So, can we leave?” Iris pulled out her keys from her pocket.
“What?” I had no idea what I had told them, but I wasn’t about to go home with them. I perched on the edge of the stool, keeping an eye out for Josh. He was used to Shelby’s crazy acts. “I’m sorry but I’m a designated driver,” I said, blurting out whatever came to mind.
“What? You’ve been drinking.” Cheryl questioned my response.
“Yeah, um...” The next thing I knew, Brian was on top of the coffee table. Lexi shimmied against his body, sliding up and down to the beat of the music. Then he turned her around and started humping her. Every muscle in my body tensed and the adrenaline hit my veins. So much for my promise. What sucked was Lexi was enjoying it, rubbing her ass all over his crotch.
It was obvious he wanted her.
But I wanted her more.
And I had to have her.
As Lexi twerked against him, his hands squeezed her thighs, inching up her dress, like he was ready to undress her right there. They had to be drunk.
“Raven, come on. It’ll be fun.” Jessa stared me in the face.
“Uh, I don’t know.” I moved my head to the right, trying to catch a better view, but Jessa followed my movements. I finally moved her out of the way, just in time to catch Lexi’s gaze. Lexi froze with her arms in mid-air, while Brian continued to grind on her.
“Excuse me.” I broke through the suffocating den of cougars and pumas and headed straight for Lexi. I grabbed her, pulling her off the table.
“Put me down!” Lexi kicked and screamed.
“Hey!” Brian yelled, but I didn’t turn around. I made a path for the front door.
I hoisted her over my shoulder, trying not to drop her. “Stop, Lexi!” She continued fighting me, which made it difficult, but I pushed through the hordes of drunkards. People yelled and chanted, as if I had my prized possession for the night. Truth was, I did.
“Put me down, Raven.” She pounded on my back, trying to wiggle free from my grip.
But I wasn’t going to let her go. She finally stopped hitting me and I was able to keep her in my arms. I darted out the front door and flew down the steps, without stopping. Once we were outside, I set her on the front lawn. She stumbled back, hitting a tree.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I huffed, trying to catch my breath.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Lexi snapped and her eyes narrowed. “I was dancing. Is that a crime?”
I blinked a few times, trying to keep calm. I had never felt jealousy before, but I was positive the burning rage in my gut was exactly that. If I couldn’t have Lexi, no one could. “You were practically having sex with that guy.” I hooked a thumb behind me.
“What?” She gasped, clutching a hand to her chest. “No, I wasn’t.” Her eyes tightened and widened, as if she was having trouble focusing.
I lowered my voice, but the anger seethed through. “I was watching you the whole time. I saw what you were doing with him.”
“You were watching me?” Her eyes glazed over and she swayed to the side.
I took a step back, staring at the ground for a moment. What the hell was I going to tell her? Like Shawn said, I broke up with her. I couldn’t expect her to stay single. It was my fault. But I didn’t care. I was wrong to question her, but I did. “Why are you here, Lexi? You shouldn’t be at this party.” I pinned her with a furious stare.
Lexi struggled to stand, making it obvious she’d had too much to drink. She leaned against the tree for support and looked at me with droopy eyes. “Why not? I’m a student at this school. Not like those hoes who were all over you.” She pointed to the house and nearly fell over.
I extended my hand, prepared to catch her, but she steadied herself. “Shit.” I kicked the dirt. “You’re fucking drunk.”
“And?” She shot me a condescending smile. “What do you care?”
Her words tore through me like a damn hurricane. I had screwed up. She’d never believe me if I told her I still cared deeply for her. “This isn’t you, Lexi.” I took a step closer and she pressed up against the tree. Her cheeks flushed and sweat ran down the sides of her temples, despite the cold air. “I know you and you’re not acting like yourself.”
“Whatever.” She waved me off. “Now, if you’ll excuse me. There’s a party that’s waiting on me.”
She placed her hand on my chest and tried to push me out of the way. But my strength was no match for hers. I wrapped my hand around her wrist and pulled her against me. Her body pressed against mine and it felt so damn good to have her back in my arms.
“Let me go, Raven,” she protested, but her fight was fading. She liked it.
And I wasn’t letting her go.
Not this time.
“No.” I scooped her up in my arms, leaving her totally defenseless in my trap. “I’m taking you home. Now.”
∑