HECTOR Protector was dressed all in green,
Hector Protector was sent to the queen;
The queen did not like him
And nor did the king,
So Hector Protector was sent back again.
At first glance, it would be fair to assume that the real Hector Protector would be one of the more famous Lord Protectors of England, the title given to the head of state standing in for the monarch or replacing the monarch altogether, as during the latter years of the English Commonwealth (1649-60). The best-known Protector was Oliver Cromwell (see Hickory, Dickory, Dock), but he was known for not liking the queen and the king, rather than their not liking him.
There is another, far more likely, candidate in Richard Plantagenet, Duke of York (1411-60). The fifteenth century was a time of great turmoil in England. When Richard arrived on the political scene, the Hundred Years’ War with France (1337-1453) was still being fought (with Joan of Arc causing trouble all over the place), skirmishes with the Scots, Welsh and Irish were breaking out along the borders, and the Wars of the Roses (1455-87), between the Yorkists and Lancastrians, were just around the corner (see Hey Diddle Diddle), sparked off by events that were about to unfold. The two central figures during this time were King Henry VI (1421-71), of the House of Lancaster, and his arch-rival, the Duke of York. For his part in a plot against Henry V, Richard’s father had been stripped of his land and titles, and executed. When his uncle, the previous Duke of York, who had remained loyal to the Crown, died heroically on the battlefield of Agincourt a few months later in 1415, the young Richard was permitted to inherit his titles and estates. When Henry V was succeeded by his son, Henry VI, the duke and the new king had a turbulent relationship right from the beginning. In a clear snub, Richard was left out of the king’s first council, formed in 1439.
Over the years that followed, Richard staked out his own claim to the throne, via lineage from his great-grandfather, Edward III, and when that failed he declared his loyalty to the king in a bid to become his rightful heir. Unfortunately for Richard’s plans, Henry VI was married to the formidable Margaret of Anjou. The queen had steered clear of affairs of state until the Duke of York started to pose an active threat to her husband, at which point she tried her utmost to block him at every turn (The queen did not like him / And nor did the king).
Then in 1453 King Henry suffered a complete mental breakdown, possibly brought on by the news of the defeat of his army at the Battle of Castillon. Richard seized his chance and insisted on forming a Great Council, after which the king’s supporters were banished to the Tower of London. Despite strong opposition from Margaret of Anjou, the Duke of York was then appointed Protector of the Realm and Chief Councillor.
But, within two years and with the help of his queen, King Henry had made a full recovery, released his allies from the Tower, reversed most of Richard’s actions and sent him back to Yorkshire (So Hector Protector was sent back again). Predictably, Richard then wasted little time in raising an army and succeeded in arresting Henry at the Battle of St Albans on 2 May 1455, although the king was soon released after agreeing to grant York and his supporters a major role in future affairs of state.
Then trouble flared up again, coming to a crunch at the Battle of Ludford Bridge in 1459, and Richard was again banished, this time to Ireland. With her husband once again held prisoner – captured by Richard’s ally the Earl of Warwick at the Battle of Northampton in 1460, effectively rendering Richard and Warwick rulers of the country – the queen decided to take over and began to raise her own army in Wales and in the north of England. When her soldiers confronted the Duke of York – who had sneaked back from exile and proclaimed himself king – at the Battle of Wakefield (1460), they captured the duke, his son and his brother-in-law the Earl of Salisbury. All three were executed the following day and the former Protector’s head was then displayed upon the gates of the city of York.
Despite his grisly demise, York must have had a genuine claim to the throne as his son Edward became king of England only a few months later, on 4 March 1461, after Henry VI had succumbed to another bout of madness. Queen Margaret fought bravely on until the Battle of Tewkesbury on 4 May 1471, where she was defeated and her son, her chosen heir to the throne, was killed. Margaret had gained a reputation as a ruthless and aggressive warrior but with the news of her husband’s murder in the Tower of London on 21 May 1471 and with her son dead, her spirit was crushed and she languished in captivity until she was ransomed by the French king. Only then did she finally return to Anjou, in France, dying in 1482.
And that is the story of the real Hector the Protector, although these days he is better known in his guise of a cartoon dolphin designed to teach children how to use the internet safely.