“Who’s next on the list?” Easton asked in between bites of a turkey sandwich. He swiveled his chair, fingers poised over the keyboard, waiting for one of them to call out another name. Easton was at the large monitor, while she and Gus flanked him on either side.
“Tina and Roger Moss,” Gus said, reaching over Easton to grab another sandwich from the tray Jules prepared for them.
“Mrs. Moss teaches private piano lessons, and Mr. Moss works in accounting at the bureau. Nothing of note in either one of their histories.” Easton rocked back in the seat and placed both hands on top of his head. “Unless Powers is fucking with us, someone on that list sent us the email.”
Kinley stood and walked over the list. She peered over Gus’s shoulder, reading down the names. They had about five more to investigate.
“Just got an email from Powers,” Easton said, minimizing one tab and opening another. “His team is dusting his office for fingerprints.”
Kinley’s finger paused on one of the names scrawled on the list. “Not gonna find anything.”
“Maybe there’s a partial somewhere.” Gus held up the tray, offering her another sandwich, and she waved him away. There was no way she could eat with her stomach clenching in painful knots. How had she missed it the first time she’d skimmed the list?
“There won’t be.” Kinley crossed her arms over her chest. Perhaps Easton’s instincts had been right where Merry was concerned, but she hated to think of someone so bright and pure having immoral intentions. “If this individual is who I think it is,” she said tapping her index finger on the paper. “He would’ve taken precautions. Pros at his level don’t slip up.”
“Who?” Easton turned to face her.
She liked how he didn’t question her hunch. He trusted her, and damn if it didn’t feel good to have his respect. “Maxwell Calder.”
“Fuck.” Gus sat up straight and leaned in to look at the list.
“Someone fill me in.” Easton rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands and refocused on the paper.
“The dispatcher who texted me. Her last name is Calder. I don’t know Merry’s father’s first name, but what are the odds?”
Easton turned back to his keyboard and began typing in the name. Within seconds, pictures of Merry’s father, retired agent Calder, filled the screen. “Moved here in two thousand and sixteen. Give me a sec to pull up his property records. Purchased a home on Lake Boon in Hudson. Less than thirty minutes from the barracks.”
The ringing in her ears drowned out the sound of Easton’s voice. Her chest was tight, the room too small. A strong grip vised around her arm.
“Kins,” Easton barked. He was inches from her, face hard and drawn. The moment she focused on him instead of the impending panic attack, his features softened and he tugged her into his side. “Don’t fight it. Trying to stop or deny it only makes them worse. Breathe through it with me.”
He dropped slowly to his knees, still anchoring her in his embrace, and sat on the floor against the wall. Easton maneuvered her onto his lap, so his solid chest was to her back. When he inhaled, long and deep, his ribcage rose against her spine, and she automatically drew in her own breath. For fifteen minutes, they sat on the floor of the office. She kept glancing at the clock on the wall, relieved and humbled that Easton didn’t try to rush the process of going back to their search just yet. He seemed to know instinctively what she needed. He didn’t rub her back or whisper soothing words. Easton simply circled his arms around her lower waist and locked her against him like a safety belt. He breathed and held on as her heart drilled like a fully automatic unloading a thirty-round magazine. Twice in a matter of two days, Easton witnessed her struggling. He didn’t make her feel weak. He made her feel like a fighter.
At some point, Gus had exchanged a silent look with Easton and gave them privacy. As her pulse evened out, she glanced at the clock once more. Half an hour. Frustration hit her square in the gut. Time they should’ve been formulating a plan to uncover more about Maxwell Calder.
“Don’t go there, Kins.” Easton’s breath caressed her shoulder.
“What do you mean?” She leaned her head back against his chest, giving him more of her weight. She’d been doing that a lot lately. Letting Easton shoulder some of the burden. Shouldn’t have made her feel so cared for, but it did.
“You’re looking at the clock, wondering about wasted time. You’re not a machine. We’ve been on edge all day. Sitting on this floor, breathing, regulating, is exactly where we need to be at this moment.”
“Thank you,” she murmured, not quite sure how to say it meant the world for him to understand on such an intimate level.
“Don’t have to thank me for taking care of you. It feels as natural as breathing.” Now that she was no longer in the midst of a panic attack, she was aware of how well they fit together. His fresh scent filled her nostrils, and she did everything she could to coat her lungs with it. To memorize it because nothing had ever smelled sexier.
An involuntary sigh escaped her lips, blowing up a strand of her hair. As much as she never wanted Easton to let her go, it was time to work. She scooted off of his lap and got to her feet. The panic attack had made her queasy and weak, not that she’d let Easton know. “I’ll call Gus back in.”
“No need.” He tilted his head slightly, looking up at her with an expression that made her already overloaded heart skip a beat.
“Why?”
“He went home with Sasha.” Easton ran both hands down his heavily muscled thighs. Ones that filled out his jeans quite nicely. “Julie left too,” he said, and she tore her gaze away from his lower half. “Gus is taking over the research for a few hours so we can rest.”
“But—” she protested.
“But nothing. We have your back. We’re a team, and we work like one. Let’s go to bed, Kins. I want you tucked into me safe and warm.”
Her body hummed, not seeming to register that Easton was only talking about sleeping. “I don’t know if that’s quite what I had in mind.”
“If you need that release, baby, you’ll get it.” His voice dropped, gruff and thick with need. “With my tongue, my fingers. I’ll lick and suck every inch of your beautiful body. Just know, when I’m inside you, there will be no one else in our bed. Just me and you, Kins. I won’t let you get lost in the shadows. That darkness isn’t allowed to enter your head when I’m loving you.”
She couldn’t help the spontaneous moan at his crass words. Loved hearing them spoken from his lips. And she couldn’t deny the swoony feeling in her belly when he used the words our bed. The darkness and the shadows flitting through her mind were not what she’d be thinking of when Easton was inside of her. Her head would be somewhere much more dangerous. It had only been a few days, yet her heart was inexplicitly, wholly focused on the man still sitting on the floor, patiently waiting for her next move.
He was good, straight down to the marrow of his bones. Protecting, encouraging, and making her feel beautiful and wanted instead of dirty and disgraced. He could light her up with just one hungry look or embolden her with his praise. Of course, when he snapped at her in the car for getting rid of the tail, it was annoying as all get out. But no one had ever cared about her well-being so much before. She turned and reached down, offering her hands. He took them but stood easily on his own. Kind of like how she was feeling right now. Easton was teaching her that just because she was one hundred percent capable of being on her own, she didn’t have to be. That steadying hand waiting to offer help didn’t make her pathetic or fragile. It made her human. Not the robot she’d been trying to impersonate for so long.
With Easton standing, she looked up and swallowed hard at the lust-driven look consuming his eyes. Their hands were still linked, and she took a step closer. “I swear when we come together, the only thing I’ll be thinking of is how strong and wanted you make me feel. How perfectly you fill me up. How I know once will never be enough.”
“God damn, Kins.” His fingers trembled as he released her hands and brought them to her face. He cupped her cheeks so gently, heat prickled behind her lids. “So fucking gorgeous. You keep knocking me flat on my ass. I’m in awe, baby. So brave.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “So resilient.” His lips moved down to the tip of her nose. The kiss he placed there was the sweetest gesture anyone had ever shown her.
She shut her eyes, savoring the gentleness he was offering.
“Compassionate. Despite everything, you fight for others.” He kissed her left eyelid. “My gladiator.” And then his lips feathered over her right eyelid. She couldn’t stop the tear from slipping down her cheek if she wanted to, but she didn’t. Easton deserved to see her. Raw, exposed, and vulnerable. He laid his emotions out at her feet, and he deserved no less.
“I’m scared. But it’s not why you think.” Her voice was merely a whisper. The steady stream of autumn sunshine had turned to dusky shadows playing over the walls, but she wasn’t scared of the dark. Not with Easton at her side.
“Then why don’t you explain?” His fingers skimmed over her jawline, down to her shoulders.
“It’s insane.” She forced herself to meet his eyes. “To feel this way so fast. I’m afraid of what I’m feeling for you. That once this is all over and we go our separate ways, you’ll take my heart with you and I’ll be crushed. I’ve never even come close to saying those three words to someone. Never thought it was possible. But with you, after such a short time, they’re on the tip of my tongue, and I’m not sure how I’m going to get through losing you.” Her words came out in a whoosh before she dropped her forehead to his chest. What had he been saying about brave and resilient? Yeah, right. She was shocked by how transparent she was with him, and yet, she didn’t want to take anything she said back.
“Why do you think you’ll lose me?” He moved his forehead against hers, once again tethering them.
“Because … I … I’m not built for relationships or long-term. I’ll screw up or get scared and try to push you away. You’ll realize I have way too many issues to be worth your time. I don’t want kids. You deserve a family, someone without so many demons—”
“That right there is complete and utter bullshit. You’re not built for relationships? Well, neither am I, but I have a feeling with you, we could lay a strong foundation, build something lasting. If you push me away, I’ll hold tighter. And kids? What makes you think I want them? Let’s leave that headache to Gus and Sasha. I have a cat. Would love to get a couple of dogs to leave their muddy paw prints over the floor. I love the idea of being an uncle. Help my siblings raise good humans, but I have no desire to have children and there’s nothing wrong with that. Kids can make a family whole, but a family can also be whole without them. Having people by your side, who have your back when shit goes sideways, that’s family all on its own. The one we’re born into or the one we discover along the way, it doesn’t matter. Neither is better or worse. And last and most important, you will always be worth my time. I’m not looking for a quick, meaningless fuck. No woman has ever stepped foot in this house. I can’t predict what will happen between us, but I do know I will never hurt you.” With a light touch, he lifted her chin. “Do you trust me?”
“Yes.” The word popped out of her mouth without an instant of hesitation. The only other person she had nearly as much faith in was Gus, and he’d been her partner for years. Part of her simply settled when Easton was near. He’d never let anything or anyone touch her, and without a doubt in her mind, she’d have his back, too.
He nuzzled her neck, the day-old stubble on his cheeks and chin sending prickles of pleasure over her skin. “Let’s go up to bed, then.” He tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear. “Whatever you want, I’ll give it. Whatever you don’t, tell me, and that’s as far as things will go. No matter what, you’re in control.”
He took her hand, and they made their way to the second floor, except this time, instead of going toward Julie’s room, Easton led her directly to his bedroom. The scent of the soap he used lingered in the air, making her feel protected. He closed the door behind them and stalked forward.
“So fuckin’ beautiful, Kins.” His hands went to her face, thumbs slowly stroking the lines of her cheeks. She loved when he touched her so reverently like she was some kind of treasure. And the way his pupils dilated, eyes turning into inky pools, so dark that her reflection was mirrored clearly in their depths. She’d never get sick of hearing her name on his lips. Or how he always thought of her perception of a situation. He had no problem laying himself bare to ensure she was aware of his intentions and feelings.
He leaned down and kissed her, nibbling on her bottom lip and dipping his tongue into her mouth. When she planted her hands on his chest, his heart thundered against her palms. His hands slid into her hair, angling her head to delve deeper. With every thrust of their tongues, a new sensation consumed her. Each time her nipples brushed against the satin cups of her bra, it was torture. Wetness pooled between her thighs, and anticipation hummed from somewhere deep in her throat.
He paused for a moment, searching her face. His hands dropped from her hair and slipped beneath the hem of her shirt, warming her back. “This okay?” His body was vibrating, heat tumbling off of him, but what melted her from the inside out was his sole focus. Her. Paying attention to what she wanted. As much as she couldn’t wait to feel his control snap, the care he was taking was so perfectly Easton. This was who he was. One of the many reasons she was losing her heart to him.
“More.” She had a feeling he wouldn’t move a muscle until she told him she was ready.
“Like this?” he asked, hands skimming up her sides. He paused before removing her shirt. She nodded, goosebumps shivering up her skin as cool air replaced the fabric. With trembling fingers, he unclasped her bra and let it fall to the floor. Impatient for more, she pushed down her jeans and panties before realizing she was tangled. Easton chuckled and dropped down, skimming his hands down the back of her legs as he sank to the floor. With a hand behind her knee, he lifted her right leg and removed her bunched clothing from around her ankle before moving to the other.
He stood and took a long look at her, the hunger flitting across his face now ravenous. “Stunning.” His voice was a hoarse whisper, choked with heat.
She reveled in being the one to put the passion in his voice, on his face. “Why am I the only one naked here?” She grinned at him, comfortable in her own skin, and stepped closer to tug up his shirt. He ripped it over his head before shucking off his pants and boxers, kicking them to the side. Kinley unabashedly took him in. He was sculpted with lean muscle and hard lines from his broad shoulders to strong thighs. His erection long and thick. There was a weightless feeling in her stomach. One that made her body clench and her breasts grow heavy.
In one graceful movement, he scooped her up. She squealed in surprise, which dissolved into laughter. She couldn’t remember a time where she was so happy and light. Probably never, which was crazy given the danger she was in.
He gently laid her on the bed and crawled in beside her, the soft mattress depressing slightly with their weight. Her blood was heated, and he hadn’t even touched her skin. She’d never felt like this. Not ever. Their lips touched once, then twice, before his tongue slipped into her mouth, and they both groaned. His hands were on her, spreading white-hot tingles wherever he touched. When he plumped her breasts and rolled the stiff peaks between his fingers, heat careened through her. Needing more, she lifted her hips, seeking more friction to ease the building ache. With his hands stuck to her sides, he flipped them in one fluid movement so she was sitting astride him.
“So damn beautiful,” he murmured, gathering the wetness from her core and circling her clit. A shiver of pleasure raced down her spine. “Move up, baby.” His hands worked over the flare of her hips, sliding her body up and over his mouth. She grabbed the headboard, totally unprepared as he dragged his tongue over her sex. The growl that tore from his lips vibrated against her. He licked and teased until she was writhing over him, mind blank to any embarrassment over her precarious position. “You taste so fucking good,” he groaned. More pleasure rippled as he stretched two fingers inside her, curling them slightly and hitting a place she didn’t even know existed. His lips latched on to her clit and sucked hard. She screamed, white knuckles gripping the frame as she broke into a million pieces. His tongue kept moving in lazy strokes as she came down from her orgasm.
“Easton, I want more. All of you.” She began to move back, but his hands on the back of her thighs stopped her progress.
“Tasting you come apart on my tongue, feeling you shake… Fuck, it was incredible. I could tuck you against me right now and be completely satisfied. We don’t need to go any further.”
“As I said, all of you.” She didn’t need to ask if he wanted more. Easton was holding on by a thread. His grip loosened and she crawled back, positioning his tip at her entrance. “Skin to skin. I don’t want a barrier between us.”
“You know I would never put you at risk. I’ve been tested. I’m clean, so—” He sucked in a breath as she dropped down, taking all of him. Years had passed since she’d been with someone, but he’d made sure she was slick and ready. Just another way Easton had put her first. They moved together, eyes locked, hands intertwined. Connected. He filled her so completely, body and soul, there was no room for shadows. No room for darkness. No room for anything but Easton and her and how they fit together like the jagged pieces of a shattered vase.