On her way up the front steps of the school building Monday morning, a girl Christy barely knew came up to her. “Are you the girl who dumped Rick Doyle?”
“Excuse me?”
“I heard you gave Rick a taste of what he’s always dishing out. Good for you!”
Christy ignored the girl’s comments and entered the building. Out of the corner of her eye, she thought she saw Rick coming in her direction. She got up the nerve to look at him, but when she looked, he wasn’t there. She didn’t know if he’d turned and gone the other way in the crowded hallways or if it hadn’t really been Rick to begin with, but she just expected to see him.
Someone bumped hard into Christy’s shoulder as they passed in the hallway. She turned and recognized the girl as one of Renee’s friends.
“What is going on?” Christy muttered to herself. She hurried to meet Katie at their lockers as usual.
Katie gave her a cool look. “I don’t know if I’m speaking to you or not.”
“You too? Take a number. Or better yet, why don’t you call me and when I answer you can hang up on me.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Katie said, giving Christy a disgusted look.
“I mean, I’m sorry. I know I messed everything up. I tried to tell you Sunday before the toddler class that I hadn’t asked my parents yet, but then everything got going so fast …”
“You’re trying to say this is my fault?”
Christy leaned against her locker and looked her friend in the face. “No, I’m not trying to say that at all. This whole mess is my doing. And I’m sorry it didn’t work out the way we planned. I was hoping it would work out, Katie. I was dreaming big things. But my parents absolutely won’t let me go.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m positively sure.”
Katie seemed to soften. “You could have called me, Christy. It’s pretty awful hearing it from one of Rick’s friends.”
“I’m sorry.”
“What’s worse is when I tell Rick’s friend he doesn’t have the story straight because I know what’s going on and he doesn’t, and then Rick walks up and says I’m wrong.”
“Katie …”
“I don’t know if I want you to apologize. You see, Rick’s never been stood up before. I’d probably be more mad at you, except I think it was time he got some of his own medicine, and you were just the one to give it to him.”
“I wasn’t trying to—”
“Lance and I will have a miserable time without you, you know.”
“No, you won’t! You two will have a wonderful time. Besides, isn’t Rick going anyway?”
“How would I know? He’s playing it so cool. Nobody knows what he’s going to do. Besides, why would he still want to go with me and Lance? He’s not exactly friends with either of us.”
The bell rang, and Katie gave Christy a playful slug in the arm. “Don’t look so depressed. You’ve got to come up with a few smiles for cheerleading tryouts this Friday, you know. Wouldn’t hurt to start practicing now.”
Christy forced a pathetic grin.
“Never mind. Go ahead and be depressed all day today and get it over with. I’ll check on your smile again tomorrow morning.”
Christy shuffled to class. The luxury of being depressed all day didn’t sound so bad.
“How was your weekend?” Liane, a girl in her algebra class, asked.
“It was interesting,” Christy answered cautiously. She wondered who else knew about Rick. Liane didn’t usually talk to her. Had her life become an open book at Kelley High School?
“Oh really? What was so interesting about it?” the girl probed.
“It was a hard weekend, that’s all.”
“Well then, I sure hope your week turns out better than your weekend!” Christy couldn’t tell if the girl was being serious or sarcastic.
Class started and Christy thought, This week has to get better. Everyone is watching me! I have to work hard at tryouts, and on Friday I have to make the squad. It won’t make up for the prom and Todd and Rick, but it’ll show everyone that I did it. And I did it on my own.
The algebra teacher passed out the corrected quizzes from Friday. He handed Christy hers first. A huge, red F had been circled on the top of the page. She had never received an F before. Ds and Incompletes, but never an F. In horror Christy discovered she had missed every problem. This was not the way to begin a week that was supposed to turn out better than her weekend.
“One-third of the class failed this exam. Those of you who did will need to take a makeup test,” the teacher announced. “I’m giving the makeup tomorrow after school.”
Oh, great! How am I going to be in two places at once? I need to be at practice, but if I don’t make up this quiz, I’m in deep trouble. And when am I going to find time to study?
Her troubles didn’t get any easier at practice. Renee huddled with her friends gossiping, and all three turned to look Christy over as she came on the field.
When Christy got close enough to hear, Renee said, “Well, at least my mommy and daddy are letting me go to the prom, not like some people we know, who are still too young to play with the big boys.”
The girls giggled. Christy ignored them, doing her stretching exercises by herself.
“Watch, she’s going to admit she’s too young to be a cheerleader too. Just wait. Yoo-hoo,” Renee mocked, “change your diaper before practice? We wouldn’t want any accidents, you know.”
Christy closed it all out, pounding a single sentence through her mind over and over: Ignore her. Ignore her. Then she added, I can do this. I can do this.
As the rest of the girls gathered, it became obvious that the hopefuls had dwindled down to the determined. Eight girls remained. On Friday the judges would select seven cheerleaders. That meant all but one of them would be chosen.
The girls were highly motivated now, each trying to prove that she deserved to be one of the chosen seven. As they ran through the cheer a few more times, Christy concentrated on making her arms the straightest, her moves the sharpest, her voice the loudest.
“Okay,” Mrs. James reminded them after practice, “those of you who are here today know that it’s between you eight. We might have one or two more who just couldn’t come today. The next three practices are crucial. Please be here for all three; otherwise, I’m sure it will affect how you do on Friday. Any questions?”
Christy waited until the other girls had left before asking about Tuesday. “I need to take a makeup test in algebra tomorrow, and that’s the only time he’s giving it.”
“It’s up to you,” Mrs. James said. “These last three practices are the most critical. You’re doing well, Christy, but I think you need the practice. You’ll have to decide which is the most important to you.”
“I could help you,” Teri said. She had stood up to Renee last week, and now she was being nice to Christy again. It was wonderfully refreshing after the way the rest of her day had gone. “If you take the test and then come late to practice, I could stay after and show you what you missed during the first part.”
“Are you sure?”
Teri nodded, her brown eyes showing her sincerity.
“Is that okay, Mrs. James?” Christy asked, still amazed at Teri’s generous offer.
“It’s up to you, girls. I’ll be here until four-thirty. After that, you’re on your own.”
“Thanks, Teri,” Christy said.
That night Christy spent at least two and a half hours on her algebra. She decided not to tell her parents about the F. Why get them all upset when the teacher would be recording the makeup grade?
She busied herself with her homework until ten o’clock, trying hard to concentrate. Wanting to get her homework done was only part of the reason for plunging in so diligently. The other reason attacked her as soon as she climbed into bed.
It was her thoughts. And her feelings, which she had so carefully guarded in her heart. Churning around like sneakers in a dryer, her thoughts and feelings now bumped into each other in the darkness: Todd, Jasmine, Rick, Katie, Renee, and all the pressure she had put on herself to make the squad. All the issues in her life spun around in her subconscious through the night.
She didn’t pray. She hadn’t since Friday. She knew she would feel better if she did, but her stubbornness kept her from yielding. Instead she chose to stay motivated by anxiety and jealousy.
Katie noticed at lunch on Tuesday that Christy wasn’t wearing her Forever ID bracelet. Christy told Katie that she would keep it as a memory, but it didn’t really mean anything anymore.
“What are you saying?” Katie questioned. “That you’ve dismissed Todd from your life? I find that hard to believe. I thought you said once that he would be in your heart forever.”
“Did I?”
“Yes, of course you did. You want to know what I think?”
“No.” Christy bit into her peanut butter and honey sandwich, knowing that Katie would disregard her reply.
“I think you really, truly love Todd deep down, but you’re afraid to get hurt because your relationship is so up and down.”
“No, Todd’s only a fantasy. I’ve wanted him to care as much about me as I care about him, but he’s always been off in his own dimension. We’re not good for each other. I’m too jealous.”
Christy didn’t even realize she felt these things. It amazed her to hear what was coming out of her mouth. “Did I just say that?”
“What, that you’re jealous?”
“Yes.”
“That’s what you said. But do you want to know what I think? I think jealousy is normal when you love someone, and it’s a good way to tell how much you care about him. The more jealous you get, the more you care.”
Christy questioned whether that was true. After all, Katie had no experience in love. How would she know what’s normal? Plus, when Todd quoted those verses on love, he had said that love was not jealous. She remembered that part.
“I don’t know, Katie. All I know is that this Jasmine girl obviously means more to Todd than I do, and I must be pretty worthless if my competition is a girl in a wheelchair.”
“Oh, low, Christy, low!” Katie cringed. “I can’t believe you said that. I don’t think you’re looking at this the right way. I mean, even if Todd had asked you, do you honestly think your parents would have let you go?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. They treat him as if he’s a long-lost nephew or something.”
“I don’t blame them! I’d treat Todd that way too. He seems like the perfect guy.”
“Yeah, well maybe he’s a little too perfect—a little too spiritual. He’s always trying to see things from God’s point of view, and it’s too hard for me to catch up. I just don’t think the way Todd does or see things the way he does. Besides, weren’t you the one who was telling me only a few days ago to let Todd go and to move on since Rick wanted to go to the prom with me?”
Katie wadded up her lunch bag, aimed, and made the shot into the trash can. She shook her head, her straight red hair swinging like tassels.
“I don’t know what I said then. But if you want my opinion now, I think Todd’s worth trying to catch up to. I mean, wouldn’t you rather be with a guy who’s a few steps ahead of you emotionally or spiritually or whatever? Seems as though the few guys in my life have only been ahead of me physically, if you know what I mean.”
Christy smiled and nodded. She knew exactly what Katie meant.
“You do know, don’t you,” Katie leaned over and spoke in a hushed voice, “that a bunch of couples have rented hotel rooms at the Coronado for, you know, after the dance.”
“Are you kidding? People from our school?” As soon as she said it, Christy realized she was being awfully naive. Of course, other students at her school were doing stuff like that. She just never thought of who was doing what. She tended to think all her friends were innocent in the same way she was—except Alissa. And she certainly hadn’t caught on until much later how intimately involved Alissa had been with her boyfriends.
“I heard that last year after the prom six of the guys on the football team and their dates were arrested for having a party in a hotel room. They were drunk and loud and smashed a bunch of furniture. The hotel security kicked them out.”
“That’s disgusting,” Christy said. “Why can’t it be a nice, sweet, innocent dance like, well, in the movies?”
“I know,” Katie said as the bell signaled the end of lunch. “I really hope another couple goes with us because, to be honest, I don’t exactly know what Lance’s idea of a good time is.”
Christy hurried to Spanish class, but Katie’s final comment stayed with her. Would Lance really have a different idea from Katie’s of what prom night should be? He did lean toward the dramatic, as the limo already represented. And Christy had learned enough to know that just because a guy said he was a Christian didn’t mean he was operating out of the same value system that a deeply committed Christian would live by.
In a strange way, for the first time Christy felt relieved that she wasn’t going to the prom with Rick. Cheerleading tryouts presented enough pressure for one week, not to mention the algebra quiz.
The makeup quiz turned out to be harder than the first test. Christy handed it in and left class with a terrible headache. The last thing she wanted was to face Renee and be behind the rest of the girls who were trying out. If it hadn’t been for Teri’s offer to stay after and help, Christy probably would have given up the whole dream then and there.
“What are you doing here?” Renee said through clenched teeth as Christy slid into place as a routine ended.
Teri turned to Renee. “You know what, Renee? The rest of us are getting sick of your comments. We’re supposed to be building a team here. If you’re so set on slamming somebody, why don’t you slam me for being Hispanic?”
“I would never do that, Teri!” Renee looked indignant. Her friends gathered around her, and Renee went on defending herself. “I’m not prejudiced against Mexicans or anybody!”
“Oh really? Then why are you against Christy just because she’s a sophomore and the rest of us are juniors? It’s the same thing as slamming me because the color of my skin is different from yours. I can’t change my skin. Christy can’t change her age. You’re the only one who can change, Renee. You can change your attitude.”
Mrs. James stepped in and told the girls to sit down. They complied but spaced themselves out and took turns glancing at Renee, who sat with her arms crossed in front of her.
“I should have said something earlier,” Mrs. James said with a concerned look. “I don’t know what has gone on over the last few weeks of practice, but I can tell you what will go on during the next few days of practice and then once the team is formed. We will be a team: working together, looking out for each other, helping each other. Each of you will have equal value to me and to each other. Understand?”
The girls quietly nodded.
“There will be absolutely no more of these bad attitudes or cruel remarks. I don’t know what all has been said, and I don’t want to know, but I think now is the time for apologies. If any of you need to apologize to anyone else here, I’ll wait and let you do that before we go into the next practice set.”
No one moved. Christy searched her mind for something she could apologize for, but she saw herself as the victim who should be apologized to.
“Sorry,” Teri said to the group. “I shouldn’t have blown up like that. I apologize if I came on too strong, Renee.”
Renee neither acknowledged Teri’s apology nor offered hers to anyone.
“Okay,” Mrs. James said, breaking the tension. “I can’t make you apologize, but I will form this group into a team. Let’s get going, and remember, I want you to work together on this.”
They practiced the next routine for twenty minutes; then Mrs. James dismissed them. No one had much to say to anyone else. Christy stayed on the field with Teri, and they went right into the moves Christy had missed at the beginning of practice.
“Thanks for what you said, Teri. I really appreciate it.”
Teri batted her long braid of dark hair off her shoulder and shook her head. “I didn’t say it very nicely.”
“But you got the point across.”
“Maybe. But if I didn’t do it with love, it counts for nothing.”
Christy froze. She had heard that phrase before. From Todd? “Is that in the Bible?”
“Yes, in 1 Corinthians.”
“The love chapter,” Christy added excitedly. “My boy—I mean, this guy I know said it to me last week. He’s memorizing it. The whole chapter.”
“Then he’s a Christian?” Teri asked.
“Slightly! I mean, yes. So am I! Are you?”
“Yes!” Teri said, nodding enthusiastically.
The two gave each other a hug as if they had just found out they were related. Then chattering quickly, Teri filled Christy in on the details of how she went to a church in which only Spanish was spoken and her dad was one of the pastors. With all the eager sharing between the two girls, they failed to get much practice in but decided to stay after on Wednesday and Thursday to help each other.
On her way home, Christy thought of how differently this day had ended than it had begun. She started by nearly losing Katie as her friend, and she ended with a new friend, Teri.