My mother, who has had a huge influence on how I approach cooking and entertaining, always had a massive list of chores for me to do, and of course the ones that kept me in the kitchen were my favorites. She taught me how to make a killer crudités platter, showed me how to make stripes in cucumber skin by using a vegetable peeler and the best way to trim cauliflower and broccoli into perfect bite-size florets, and explained why you always need to wrap bell pepper slices in paper towels (otherwise, they get slimy). Sometimes the whole family would gather in the kitchen for hours, hand-rolling mini meatballs, enough for a party—and the rest to freeze for the remainder of the year. I learned early on that when you bring friends and family together for an event you designed with them in mind, people immediately feel special. They open up, the conversation flows, they laugh a little more—everyone seems just a little bit happier. Who doesn’t want a little more of that in their lives?
After graduating from culinary school and working with some top-notch chefs, I started my own catering company and threw parties for the likes of Christina Hendricks, Katy Perry, and Elon Musk. And while the Hollywood elite may have had high standards and demands, I loved it. I thrived!
I not only create focused and delicious dishes, but also bring a party to the next level with stunning tablescapes, elaborate decorations, perfect playlists—whatever it takes to make an event what it deserves to be: memorable and fabulous.
I loved the holidays even at a young age. Here I am dyeing Easter eggs (with a bad haircut).
My sister, Jen, me, and my mom at a holiday party.
That’s why I wanted to write this book: to share what I’ve learned. I want everyone in the world to stop waiting for the right reason to throw a party, and just… throw a party! Create your own occasion, because every single day is worth celebrating. It can be as simple as a hunker-down-at-home-during-a-snowstorm party, a movie night for two—or a total blowout cocktail party with a bartender, bubbles, and confetti.
Over the fifteen years my husband, Neil, and I have been together, we’ve thrown literally thousands—okay, probably hundreds—of parties of every kind, from brunches and picnic lunches to all-out black-tie bashes. We don’t hold back!
So how do I do it? Well, a successful party is much more about the sum of its parts than it is about just one detail. I’ve been acting since I was a child, and I have realized that while an actor’s performance is important, it is lost if the scene itself isn’t fully realized. Sure, I can assume a new identity with a uniquely delivered line, or captivate a crowd with a rousing musical number, but that tells only half the story—the rest is told through ambience, wardrobe, lighting, music, props, and, of course, the set. A dynamite dinner party is no different.
You can serve delicious, bite-size morsels and mix the perfect cocktail, but if you haven’t set up your room to allow for space and flow, how will your guests mingle? If the music is too loud, how will they talk? If the time you choose to throw your party doesn’t make sense—I’m thinking a kid’s birthday party too late in the evening during the witching hour!—people might feel uncomfortable and not have a good time. Just as with acting, if you’re prepared and have approached the party with thoughtfulness and care, if you’ve put the right elements in place and invested in making the occasion special, you can open that front door feeling confident that a great gathering is under way.
Dinner is a meal, but a dinner party has the opportunity to be an event.
I DECIDED TO ORGANIZE THIS BOOK by season, with quintessential holiday-specific parties as well as “anytime” gatherings, because that’s how we organize our lives—from big event to small, based on our schedules and also what produce is the freshest. My hope is that the ideas, advice, photos, and encouragement on the following pages will fill your inspiration tank until it’s brimming with ideas, and also give you practical strategies for making any party seem as effortless as it is exciting. And let’s be real—no one wants to see a stressed-out host, either before or during a party. A party should be fun for everyone… including you!
Dinner is a meal, but a dinner party has the opportunity to be an event.
I’ll also share recipes that I’ve created for many a memorable occasion. Some are family classics that I’ve given a twist, while others are from my years of cooking, both pre- and post-kids, for clients, teachers, parents, and friends. After Neil and I had our kids, Harper and Gideon, we didn’t stop entertaining. We simply reconfigured how we entertain. Sometimes that means parties that the whole family can enjoy (and you’ll find several of them throughout Life Is a Party), and sometimes it means adults-only parties (and yes, you really do need to be explicit on those invites!).
Oh, and speaking of invites—one of the most exciting things I’ve learned is that once you send the invitation, congratulations—you’ve already won! The good-time gathering gears are officially set in motion. People tend to love a party, and arrive primed to celebrate, dine, dance, and savor the few hours of bliss you’re offering them. They don’t care so much about the perfect placement of the chives or whether the napkin is folded with exact precision; they’ve come to connect, to indulge, to enjoy—and you’ve made that possible. It’s a good feeling.
So enjoy the hard-earned wisdom and instruction on the pages of this book. You can follow every suggestion step-by-step, from start to finish, or you can pick and choose different elements and ideas to incorporate into any celebration. It’s entirely up to you. But if I’ve learned anything, it’s this: If you get stressed in the process of planning, don’t worry. Just take a deep breath (and perhaps a sip of wine!) and remember that it’s allllll good. Who you’ve brought to the table counts as much as what you put on it.
Welcome to the party! Now turn the page, and let’s have some fun!