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“What if I need you?”
Were there words more persuasive that those? Doubtful.
I’d vowed to myself that I’d always take care of her. But there’d been no mistaking sex had left her with discomfort and I didn’t have it in me that night to add to it.
There were other ways—ways she’d been hesitant to try before—so I’d have to do my fair share of persuading. Her consent in all things was important to me, not only because it was right and moral, but it had a high value to me.
I’d never hurt or humiliate her, and if my alternative to sex wasn’t for her, then I’d lean on more tried-and-true methods.
I could read her body.
Then again, occasionally bodies lied, so I’d be extra careful. I also had to focus on not letting myself lose control, which I expected to be nearly impossible.
I had to do my best. Blue eyes were waiting for me.
Ever so slowly, I closed the distance between our lips and before they touched, I slipped my tongue out and with a faint—almost not-even-there touch—I stroked across her pink top lip.
Myra’s lids fluttered shut and her mouth parted.
My words were near soundless. “Do you want more?”
Her weight seemed to come off her bones and she sank into the top of the mattress on her side in my arms. She nodded, but it wouldn’t do me any good if I couldn’t see her agreeance later.
“Say it, please.” Her eyes remained shut and her face was all but slack. I repeated, “Do you want more?”
“Yes.” A lovely green light.
“Hold still for me.”
She was languid already, not to mention perfect.
I’d need her trust, so I began to earn it and ran my tongue from the corner of her mouth, across the ridge of her cupids bow to the other side with delicate accuracy.
This is how I’ll kiss you there, I thought.
Her shuddering breath was a good sign. So was the way her neck seemed to further weaken. I spent time kissing her that way, opening her like a piece of candy. One bit at a time.
Her cheek. Her ear. A gentle suck on her lobe.
“Do you want more?”
“Yes.”
Her shoulder. The warm crook at her collar that smelled like a cherry blossom. Then one long swipe up her neck with a blow across her tempered skin.
“Do you want more, baby?”
“Yes,” she said, and the word faded like a hiss as she released a lungful of air.
Before her gown landed on the floor beside the bed where I dropped it, a breast was in my mouth. The pair liked different things. She’d moan and squirm when one was gently bitten, and giggle with the other.
I avoided the funny one but didn’t rush the job.
A lick. The roll of her nipple between my lips.
“More?”
“Oh, yes.”
As I sank down the bed, between her legs, I held her sides in my hands and kissed from the northeastern summit, where I’d earned a wanton sigh, to her scorching southwest. My thumbs pressed lightly into the dimples where her hips met her waist.
I was intoxicated. That had to be why my brain was working against me. Cataloging every texture. Every taste. Every scent. If I didn’t find some composure, I’d surely lose my way.
I knew what was ahead of me, it was already slick and pressed against my chest.
Breathe. Tame yourself.
Adjusting myself lower, I kissed her open thigh and moved my arms from above to underneath her body. One hand roved across her hip, and she surprised me when her fingers found mine. Maybe she knew I’d need to hold on, because then she begged, “Please, I can’t wait. Kiss me there.”
I was obedient.
A hunger like I’d never known possessed me, fueled me with each taste, each breath. I’d touched her many times, but she had never felt like that. That wet. That succulent.
It only took seconds or maybe hours, I wasn’t sure, but all too soon she pulsed in the most exquisite way. I throbbed, aching to be inside her again, but my focus was on her.
One hand in mine, the other fisted my hair clutching me to her center. The quietest cries I’d ever almost heard hung in the air, and I savored everything about it.
Then, like a fleeting summer she cooled, and her rolling hips slowed.
Although I had best view in the house looking up at her, I was careful not to wear out my welcome, and with one last kiss to the patch of hair just above Eden, I climbed my way back to the headboard.
Her smile was facetious and coy, like she had a secret she’d never tell. Her chest rose and fell, slower each time.
“I can’t move,” she confessed.
I laughed despite my manners. “You don’t have to.” As I got situated, burying my arm behind the pillow under her wild hair, she scooted back against my chest and pulled my free hand to her front.
Myra whispered, “I didn’t know what I was missing.”
Neither had I.
She yawned and shimmied against my wasted erection.
Believe me, I would survive. And if I didn’t that would have been okay too. I regretted nothing.
“My girl liked it.”
“Loved it. Loves you.”
The next few days were up in the air. Anything could happen, and I doubted there was much left to surprise me back in Lancaster. And going back for another funeral was about as far away as you could get from a vacation. There’d be little to nothing pleasant awaiting us.
Except... I was going there with her and then bringing her back with me. Both truths brought me as much peace as I’d find, and I fell asleep.
#
MYRA HAD A STACK OF clothes, hair tools, and shoes on the bed and an overflowing gallon freezer bag beside them.
“Do you have a suitcase?” she called from the bottom of our shared closet.
I stuck my head around the door and found her crouched next to a box, one of her old dresses in her hands. She worried her lip and her brow was pinched.
“You don’t have to wear those.”
“Yeah, I know.”
I backed up as she stood to climb out, bringing two dresses with her.
“But I might bring the nicer ones. If anything I can donate them.” Of course she would think like that.
“I only have a small duffel bag,” I said. All she’d had when she came back from the Griers were trash bags. She had the three trunks, but those weren’t leaving. “I’ll call Ashely and borrow something we can share.”
I wanted to travel with Myra in the future. Places new to both of us. Trips and adventures, we’d remember fondly and talk about long into our golden years.
We’ll need suitcases for our honeymoon, I thought.
Our status was complicated, but one way or the other, we’d come out on the other side—husband and wife in all the ways authentic to us. A good life awaited, and it was just on the horizon.
“Oh, okay. I have a bag on the table for Violet you can take them.” She cocked her hip and rested her hand on the denim jeans she wore. “I didn’t realize until now how much stuff I use every day. Hair. Makeup. Clothing choices. Shoes.” She wasn’t vain, and her style was naturally modest, but compared to her previous look it was a contrast. She blew a lock of hair from her face as she studied the bed. “We might need two.”
She had a funny mixed up look. Embarrassment. Shock. A hint of playful self-deprecation.
Grinning, I assured her, “I’ll get two.”
She scratched her head in awe of her things. “I think I’m what they call high maintenance.”
My belly shook. “Ha! No.” I cupped her blushing cheeks in my hands and kissed them both. “Not hardly. I’ll go find something, and you get what you need ready.”
She closed her eyes, so I pressed my lips against hers. “I’ll be back in a little bit. You need anything else, just call.”
Going down the porch, I spun my truck keys around my finger, then came to a halt before marching back inside. I tossed my keyring on the counter and grabbed Myra’s instead. We’d take her car to Lancaster, and I’d fill it up while in town.
The car smelled more tropical than when I’d borrowed it from Chris, and I had to do a major seat adjustment just to get inside.
I made a few calls on the drive, and it turned out Ashley had bags we could use.
“Hell, borrow them for as long as you need. I’m not going anywhere,” she’d said on the phone.
I was glad I’d called first because she was just about to feed the baby. So I rode to the gas station to give them time to do what they needed. The tank was only half-empty, but I topped it off.
Taking her car, instead of my truck would be for the best. Maybe we’d slip into town unnoticed. At least, for a while.
When I finally knocked on Ashley’s front door, I was greeted with a cheerful, “Come on in, Abe.”
“Myra sent these,” I said and handed her the full brown paper sack. She loved picking up things for Violet when she saw them.
“She needs to stop,” Ashley demanded with a grateful smile. “You hang out in here with Ms. Brighteyes and I’ll run down to the basement and get those cases.” She bent over and tickled the baby’s cheek. “I’ll be right back,” she sang to her.
“Hey, no. I’ll go down and get them.” I hated putting her out even more.
“Are you kidding? I need the stretch. I’ve been sitting forever.” She walked around the coffee table toward the hall and the basement door. “Violet, watch your Uncle Abe for me.”
I sat on the couch in front of the baby, strapped into her bouncy thing, arms moving. It was one of the few times I’d seen her with her eyes open. Ashley was right though; they were big and lively.
“Hello there, Violet.” I didn’t have much experience with babies, so I wasn’t sure what to talk about, but her head bobbled my way when I spoke like she was paying attention. “Whatcha doin’? Just taking it all in?” I went back and forth on who she looked like more. Her features were Ashley’s, but her expressions were all Chris.
As one does, I leaned forward and put my finger in her hand, swaying it against the ducky-patterned blanket Myra had sewn. “You’re going to get big too fast, aren’t you?”
What had looked like a hiccup proved to be more when some upchuck spilled out her mouth. “Oh no.” I wiped it up with a rag tucked in beside her. “We don’t need that.”
Banging up the stairs, Ashley reappeared with two black pieces of luggage. The small one was more than I’d need, but I’d bring Myra what she asked for.
“You talk to Vi like Chris does.” She laughed. “Like an adult. Will these work?” The big one rolled forward, and she plopped the other on top of it.
I nodded and swiped the last bit of spit off her daughter’s lip.
“Crap, did she puke, and how long are you going to be gone?” she asked in one long string of words like the two things were related.
I wasn’t sure what to answer first. “Yes, but just a little and we got cleaned right up. Didn’t we?” Violet and I shared a high-five. “And I don’t know. Not long, I hope.”
She grimaced. “How’s she doing? What about her classes?”
I wasn’t sure if it was some mommy-multitasking thing Ashley was doing with all the questions, but it was making my head spin bouncing from one thing to the next.
Probably because I didn’t have any of the answers. “I think she’s doing all right considering.” Considering how confusing it must have been. I would have been conflicted about a lot of things if one of my parents had passed away so soon after I’d left all those years ago. I put the brakes on that train of thought and answered her other question. “And she’s pretty set on that GED, so I’m certain she’ll be fine.”
Ash bit her nail, concerned, and I was grateful that there were others who really cared for Myra. People having your back was sometimes the best armor.
She sat on the arm of the recliner. “How are you? You hate Lancaster. Think your dad’s gonna try to pull some shi...crap?” she corrected. “I have to watch my mouth.”
“I wouldn’t put it past him. But, if there’s anything good in him, he won’t. Not at a time like this.” Then again, Jacob’s funeral hadn’t been enough to keep him from wielding power and taking advantage of something tragic. He’d tried to gain from Myra’s predicament and tried to guilt me into returning. And Jacob had been his flesh and blood.
She frowned and then leaned forward, glancing at her phone. “You got a few extra minutes to hang out? I could change the laundry and load the dishwasher?” Ashley’s brows drew up her forehead, and she plastered a pleading smile.
She was doing us a favor after all. “I don’t want to leave Myra alone long, but we’re not pulling out of town until later.”
“I’ll hurry.” She popped right up. “You two talk about the weather.”
A few minutes later, I sent Myra a text with a picture of the luggage.
ME: I’ll be back soon. Ashley is doing a few things while I’m here first.
With a sleeping Violet in the crook of my crossed leg, I waited for her reply.
MYRA: Take your time. How’s the baby?
I snapped a photo of my view and sent it too.
ME: I swear she was awake a few minutes ago, cooing and looking around. I guess my conversation put her to sleep.
MYRA: lol What were you talking about?
ME: I was asking her what kind of wood she’d like for a rocking horse.
While Violet’s lashes fluttered as she slept, I thought about how proud I was of my girl for being brave enough to take her life into her own hands and choose for herself about her health and what she wanted. However, there’d come a day when we were both ready for a child, and I looked forward to it.
She’d be a wonderful mother when the right time came. I’d do my best to keep up.
Still, I couldn’t deny that every time I was around Chris and Ashley’s tiny person, the idea seemed more appealing. Exciting even.
It was a great reminder when I’d needed one that even though it would be a hell of a week, we had good things ahead.
MYRA: She probably thought you said slumber instead of lumber.
I chuckled so loud it startled the baby.
She was joking, or at very least being sarcastic. That was good, right?
ME: The truth is out. Do I bore you too?
MYRA: So board. Hahaha!
“You’re Aunt Myra is silly, Violet,” I whispered, feeling some anxiety loosen its hold in my chest. Maybe a few minutes with a baby was just what I needed to relax.
“And your Uncle Abe is in love, and it’s so gross,” Ash teased, a towel on her head. Yeah, she also took a shower while I was there, but—true to her word—she’d been quick about everything. I hadn’t been there much longer than thirty minutes total. “Just kidding. It’s not that gross, but it is weird.”
I didn’t think so. Not anymore.
“Weird? This coming from a woman with purple hair?”
With mock offense, she argued, “It’s a tribute to my first born. Okay?”
I hadn’t thought about it like that, and since she mentioned it, it was fitting.
“Anyway, thank you for sticking around. I needed that half-hour.”
Careful not to wake her, I lifted the sleeping baby but before I could put her down in the bouncy chair thing, Ashley took her from me. She kissed the top of her child’s head and settled into the other end of the couch. “I have to go back to work in a few weeks and I won’t be around to soak up this love all day.” She nuzzled the top of Violets head. “But I can today.”
I left the two of them, promising Myra and I would keep in touch and travel safely.