Chapter Four

The Thirst

When I found myself still in Will’s cellar the following night, I had to finally admit that this was no nightmare. At least not one I could wake from. I still couldn’t remember how I came to be here, and for the life of me couldn’t begin to understand what Will was hoping to achieve. With his looks, I didn’t think he’d ever have a problem getting any woman he wanted, so what was the big deal with me? I had no illusions about myself, being in any kind of show business will do that for you. Constantly surrounded by taller, slimmer and more beautiful people doesn’t do a whole lot for one’s self-esteem, believe me. I’d failed many an audition because of my height – or lack of it, and sometimes because of my red hair too.

My stomach felt as though something was stabbing me from the inside, and the searing intensity of the pain made me gasp and double over each time it flared. But I refused to sit and feel sorry for myself.

Forcing myself to stand, I went towards the door, or where I imagined the door should be.

I hated the dark. I’d told him that, the bastard. Did he get some kind of kick out of keeping me locked up here in the dark? Despite his protests to the contrary, he had to be some kind of pervert.

I felt my way along the damp, slimy wall until I found the door. Metal. Perfect for a prison, I thought bitterly. I kicked it in frustration and was gratified when it made a loud noise that reverberated around the walls.

I pictured Will upstairs somewhere entertaining and having to explain the noises coming from his cellar. I kicked the door again and again, amazed at my own strength. At this rate I’d be able to break the door down and get out of this damn place.

The room was suddenly flooded with harsh electric light, and I closed my over-sensitive eyes against its intrusive glare. The door opened outwards, and because I was leaning against it, I cannoned into a large immovable object, which turned out to be the man himself. His eyebrows rose in surprise, and he put his hands on my shoulders to steady me.

‘Are you having fun?’

‘You left me alone in the dark again.’

He continued to keep me at arm’s length, and his strong hands curled like steel bands around my arms. He walked us both back into the room and kicked the door shut, as he regarded me with interest.

‘As you can see, I have now arranged electricity in this part of the house for you,’ he said as if he’d just paid for dinner at the Ivy. ‘That should alleviate some of your discomfort.’

‘Shutting me in this … cell is what’s causing my discomfort.’

‘It is a necessary precaution for the moment, I am afraid,’ he replied. ‘I apologise. Again.’

He dropped his hands from my arms and I turned away from him, walking further into the room.

‘I am afraid we need to address the problem of your feeding tonight.’ His voice was quiet.

‘I can hardly wait to see what you come up with this time.’

To my surprise, he turned back to the door and opened it again. Glancing back over his shoulder he inclined his head at me. ‘Would you accompany me?’

‘Is there a choice?’ I countered.

‘Not really.’

‘Great,’ I muttered. ‘OK, lead the way to another dark and miserable place, I’m all yours.’

‘Would that, that were true.’ An amused tone had crept into his voice again.

Against my better judgement, I followed him. It got me out of this cellar after all, even if it did only lead to another. My ‘dungeon’ turned out to be connected by a small passageway to another door, which, in turn, opened onto what appeared to be an old wine cellar. I had no idea where this place was, but any house that had cellars, plural, had to be pretty old, very big, and worth a considerable amount of money. Hadn’t he said the house was Georgian? If we were still in London, we were talking millions.

I clutched my stomach as the Thirst made its presence known again. I stumbled and missed a step. Will’s arm immediately encircled my waist to prevent me from falling, and I flinched at his touch. He let me go at once. Perhaps he wasn’t a pervert then, just a sadist.

As we walked further into the wine cellar, I became aware that I could actually hear a heartbeat. A strong smell of unwashed flesh pervaded my nostrils at that point, and I gagged. Someone else was in this cellar and they were definitely alive.

Looking around, I noticed the crumpled form of a skinny young man as he lay comatose on the floor.

‘What the hell have you done?’ I whispered in horror.

‘Sent out for a take-away,’ came the flippant answer.

‘Most take-aways are pizza or Chinese.’

‘I discovered this one attempting to break into my house,’ came the cold reply.

‘So … what? You thought you’d smash his brains in and then drink him dry?’ My voice trembled.

Will gave a harsh laugh. ‘I will neither drain him nor kill him. Although I admit to being sorely tempted to do both.’ He pushed the man’s body over with a contemptuous flick of his boot. ‘You will snack on him, and then I shall call our worthy police to have him arrested.’

‘Well I don’t know much about vampires,’ I said. ‘But even I know that there will be visible puncture wounds, and I am not biting into him or any other human. That’s the grossest thing you’ve come up with yet.’

Will turned to face me. ‘There really is no choice child,’ he said quietly. ‘It is the survival of the fittest, which, I can assure you, will be you, rather than this piece of pond life.’

I pushed my tangled hair out of my eyes as I looked down at the man again. I became aware of the smell of warm blood and my body suddenly craved the taste.

I knew then that Will had told the truth all along and my body wanted blood. Wanted it badly.

God help me, I wanted to taste him. I could feel the surge of the Thirst and my whole body trembled with the ferocity of it. I turned wild, frightened eyes to Will who merely began to lead me towards the man.

My body shuddered at the conflict and I struggled involuntarily against Will’s iron grip. He held me fast, apparently without any effort at all on his part, talking softly to me all the time even though I paid no attention to the words.

My body wanted blood, but my brain didn’t agree.

‘I can’t.’ I was frantically struggling to free myself from his grasp. ‘Not from a person.’

‘Yes. You can,’ reassured Will. ‘It is your nature. I would have allowed you to feed from a bottle, but you refused that. This is now the only way forward for you. Your instincts will take over and help you to feed.’

‘Blood made me sick,’ hysteria made my voice rise. ‘Sucking blood from a person is revolting—I can’t—I won’t—’

‘Yes, you will,’ he corrected. ‘You cannot go another night without sustenance, you have to believe me.’

I shook my head, trying to clear my jumbled thoughts.

I can’t drink blood. Why is he making me do this? What kind of monster is he?

I was vaguely aware that Will was speaking again, but I didn’t want to listen to him. A sob caught in my throat, and my body shuddered.

The ravening Thirst now consumed me, any rational thoughts I had became clouded, and I trembled from head to foot. I could feel the insistence of the Thirst, which seemed to dictate I should drink blood from the unconscious man on the floor. I looked up at Will, and fancied that the cold look in his eyes softened for just a moment.

‘I will help you. Trust me.’

‘I must have trusted you once, and all that got me is dead.’

He rolled his eyes in exasperation. ‘I will help you.’

I looked down at the unfortunate man, who sported a large bruise on his cheek. I had no doubt that bruise had been courtesy of my green-eyed jailer. Will hauled him up with one hand, keeping a firm grip on my arm with the other. He held the man upright, as though he weighed nothing at all, and turned back to me. ‘Feed little one.’ He released my arm.

The Thirst surged through my whole body again, and I shuddered violently. My hand shook when I tentatively touched the man’s arm. It felt so warm. I could hear the hypnotic beat of his pulse, and even smell the blood that pumped through his veins and around his body; blood that flowed so very close to the surface of his skin. I could hear the pounding of his heart, controlling the blood … warm lifeblood circulating his unconscious body … blood …

My nostrils flared again.

‘Feed,’ Will repeated.

‘I don’t know how,’ I whispered, closing my eyes against the pain that racked my body. ‘I don’t know what to do.’

‘Your body will dictate what to do. Move closer.’

With faltering steps, I moved close to the unconscious man. All at once, my body urged me to feed, to sink the fangs I was now aware of into the unfortunate man’s neck. But my brain clung to the last vestiges of humanity it had left, and urged me to stop. What was I thinking? I moved in a little nearer, but it didn’t help. I felt confused, disorientated and very frightened.

I drew in a shaky breath, and sank to my knees, with cold tears trickling down my face. ‘I can’t.’

I expected Will to be angry, but he didn’t seem to be. He let the man fall back to the floor callously and moved as if to take me in his arms. I stood up in sudden panic and shook my head as I moved swiftly away from him. My stomach churned with nausea and my eyes filled with tears of self-pity as I looked up at Will. ‘Let me die. Please … just kill me.’

He came close and watched me for a few moments. ‘If you would come here to me,’ he held his arms wide, ‘I could help remove the pain.’

I shook my head. ‘You’re supposed to be helping me, not seducing me.’

‘I am trying to help.’ He sounded exasperated.

I closed my eyes as the Thirst raged inside me. ‘Then, for God’s sake, help me.’

‘Let us just take one step at a time.’ He started to draw me back towards my cellar, but I shook my head again, trying to pull away from his grasp. ‘No. I don’t want to go back there. Please don’t lock me in there again.’

He scooped me up easily in his arms, carried me back to the other room, and over to the bed, onto which he unceremoniously dumped me. I rested my head on my drawn-up knees and shook uncontrollably as the pain continued to slice through my stomach like so many sharp knives. Will put his hands gently on my shoulders, holding my gaze with his own, when I looked up at him.

‘I will not leave you alone for very long,’ he said. ‘Just sit here for a moment. I will even leave the door open for you, and I shall return swiftly, that I promise.’

I continued to stare at him while I decided whether or not I could trust him. His eyes gleamed brightly in the artificial light, their depths as deep as any ocean, but his expression looked sincere enough. I wrapped my arms around myself once more, as tremors again took hold of my body. He traced the backs of his fingers so very gently down my tear-stained cheek, and even that brief, soft touch made my body shiver in anticipation of another touch. I closed my eyes, not trusting myself to look into those feral eyes anymore.

‘I shall be right back.’

Then he was gone. I felt his absence immediately, it was as though a part of myself had been torn away, and that scared me almost more than anything else in this never-ending nightmare. I’d never been dependent on another person and I didn’t want to start now. I closed my eyes tightly, willing the awful vibrations in my body to stop. If this was eternal life, I’d take death – death for all eternity sounded blissful at this moment in time.

I kept my eyes closed as I told myself to try and ignore the Thirst and my unwarranted anxiety at Will’s absence. After a while I became suddenly aware of his return, and the smell of fresh blood.

Warm, fresh blood that was very close.

My eyes snapped open to see Will in front of me holding a china mug. My fuddled brain managed to register the fact it had Buffy the Vampire Slayer printed on in blood-red lettering, but I felt far too ill to appreciate the irony.

Will knelt down close to me and held the mug out. But I still trembled and couldn’t have taken it from him, even if I had wanted to, and I wasn’t sure I did want to. He stood back up and sat beside me, putting his free arm firmly around my shoulders. I went to move away, but the moment he touched me, the shuddering inside my body quieted, and I turned to look at him in surprise.

‘Sip this very slowly.’ He watched me intently.

I looked at the thick, red liquid and felt my stomach heave. ‘It will make me sick again.’

‘No. I do not believe it will.’

He held the mug to my lips and I sipped, very, very slowly at first, but then as the taste overwhelmed me, I drank faster and faster, gulping down the warm, metallic thickness of it as fast as I physically could.

‘Slowly. I can provide more.’

I finished the contents of the mug at a more sedate pace and turned to look at him, both amazed and revolted at what I’d done.

‘I will get more.’ With that, he left the room again.

Oh, I knew where the blood was coming from, my own human drinking fountain, but I had no idea how that much blood was finding its way into a mug so quickly. I didn’t want to ask either. Will returned with a full mug and held it out to me. ‘Are you able to hold this?’

I nodded and took it from him. When I had finished, the excruciating pain at long last subsided. I felt revitalised, almost alive again, and certainly well enough to hold his gaze steadily with my own.

‘Thank you – I think,’ I said and was rewarded by a devilish grin.

‘The pleasure is mine. Although I confess my intentions are partially dishonourable. I intend to return to my romantic seduction programme when you are feeling up to it.’

‘So that’s your evil plan.’

The grin widened with a flash of gleaming fangs. He stood there in front of me, all satanic seduction personified. I bet he didn’t get turned down too often. In fact, I felt convinced he didn’t get turned down ever.

‘Do you need more sustenance?’

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak, and he took the mug from me once more. He reappeared a few minutes later, and handed me the refilled mug.

‘Finish this while I tidy things up,’ he said. ‘I shall be back soon.’

‘But you will come back?’ I felt suddenly and inexplicably afraid of being left alone.

‘Of course.’

I was continuing to sip at the warm contents of the mug, when memories began to flood my head noisily and colourfully, each jostling for prior position. I almost fainted at the onslaught. Fragmented pictures swam luridly around, as conversations from previous days resounded, jangling and harsh. I saw a bizarre image of myself, fighting desperately to get out of a closed coffin deep beneath the earth. Images that caused my eyes to fly open in an attempt to break free of them. What world of madness was this? ‘Let us go little vampire.’ Will’s voice, deep and commanding. When? Where?

Other memories continued to assault my brain, most of them jumbled and confused. I couldn’t separate what was grim reality from what appeared to be horrifying dreams. Perhaps this revolting cellar was, in fact, the dream? Although sadly, that seemed much more likely to be wishful thinking on my part.

Strangely, I found I could now remember more of my previous human life, although events were somewhat haphazard and in no particular order.

Where had I first met Will? How had I ended up here in this predicament? Drinking blood?

I stared down at the nearly empty mug. There was a little of the warm liquid left at the bottom and my stomach suddenly churned violently.

In a fit of violent remorse, I stood and hurled the mug across the room, just as Will reappeared. He caught it deftly with a movement that was preternaturally swift and almost too fast to see.

‘Trying to save on the washing up?’

‘Did you kill him?’ I had to know.

‘No need. I merely called the police, and had him arrested for attempted breaking and entering. His various bruises were obviously my pathetic attempts at self-defence.’

‘What about his lack of blood or holes in his neck?’ I persisted.

‘By the time he appears in the Magistrates’ Court his blood will have replenished itself and there are no marks on his neck.’

I wanted to ask how the blood had been taken but felt afraid to.

‘I extracted the blood straight from a vein, by means of tubes and machinery, in much the same way as a nurse would, from a blood donor. Which, in fact, he was.’ Will smiled at his own joke.

‘Where the hell did you get that kind of equipment? And stop taking questions out of my head.’

‘Money buys most things,’ was the reply. ‘Your questions are bombarding me somewhat at the moment and it is a little difficult to differentiate the ones spoken aloud to the ones you are thinking.’

That could be a problem if I was thinking about escaping at any time.

‘I would not advise that,’ Will said, proving my point. ‘You would never survive without my guidance.’

‘Who guided you?’

His face became impassive again, his eyes unfathomable, although they glittered like angry emeralds. ‘It is a long and extremely unpleasant story.’

I decided to change the subject fast.

‘Will I get better?’

‘Better?’ He threw me a quizzical look. ‘What do you mean, child?’

‘Better at being a vampire,’ I replied, frowning at him. ‘I seem to be pretty useless at it so far.’

He moved closer and I stared up at him.

‘Now that you are beginning to feed, you will be fine. I am the best teacher you could have, after all.’

I searched his face for sarcasm and found none. He seemed so confident, who was I to burst his bubble?

I decided, however, not to tell him about my returning memories, I wasn’t ready to confide in him. He was too arrogant … too controlling … too … too bloody everything actually. If he could pick up on my thoughts, he was welcome to the memories as well. If I couldn’t make any sense out of them yet, then he sure as hell wouldn’t be able to.

‘Would you care to take a walk?’

I looked at him in amazement. Anywhere away from this dank cellar would be sublime. ‘Walk? Where?’

‘Outside, of course.’

Outside? In the open air? That had to be his best idea yet.

I wondered whether it was day or night. ‘Is it sunny?’

He favoured me with a mocking glance. ‘I sincerely hope not.’

I just stared at him again.

‘Vampires are unable to go out in the sun, little fledgling,’ he said. ‘We are creatures of the night. Surely you knew that?’

Yes, of course I had known that, I’d watched loads of Buffy reruns with everyone else, and I’ve often ogled Eric Northman from True Blood too, but somehow I hadn’t likened any of it to my own state. Fiction was fiction. But now the realisation hit me like a sledgehammer: it would mean living in darkness for eternity.

‘You mean I’ll never see the sun again?’

He already knew how much I hated the dark.

He looked pensive for a moment. ‘You can look at it through darkened glass, but you will never again be able to go out in direct sunlight. As a fledgling, you will not even awaken until after the sun has set. For that, I am truly sorry.’

I let this latest bombshell sink in and looked disconsolately at the floor.

‘Would you like to take a bath?’ He changed the subject swiftly.

I looked up in surprise and he gave me a wry smile. ‘I am trying to make this easier for you, but you will have to meet me halfway, as I am considerably out of practice.’

I decided to humour him. ‘A bath would be good. Different clothes would be even better.’

He nodded and motioned me to follow him back through the doorway.

Will led me back through the other cellar – the man had gone, of course, and there was no trace of him, just a lingering smell of blood, which probably only a vampire would notice.

We passed through another doorway and Will led the way up some stairs. A door at the top opened onto a small landing and he opened another door to reveal an enormous bathroom. It appeared to be almost the size of my whole flat in Crouch End, so he had to be one very wealthy vampire.

The sunken bath was huge, it looked as though it could easily accommodate four people with room to spare. I wondered idly what kind of parties vampires went in for, then decided I really didn’t want to know. An ornate hand basin against the far wall had an antique oak cupboard above it, and in the corner of the room was a large glass cubicle, housing a modern, state-of-the-art shower, which I made a mental note not to use whenever Will was around. It was just a little too see-through for my taste.

The toilet looked to be an early Victorian design, with a high cistern, an elaborate chain with enamel pull, and an oak seat. Do vampires have normal bodily functions? Somehow I didn’t think so. The floor was made up of large flagstones, which looked centuries old to my untrained eye. Just how old was this place again? The walls were partly tiled with plain, gleaming white tiles, and the rest of the walls were painted an ivory colour. The brass taps glinted in the soft lighting and I noticed there were no windows. This bathroom seemed to be completely vampire-friendly, and it also felt as though we were still underground.

Will turned on the gleaming taps and spun around to face me. ‘Bubbles?’ he held up two different, expensive-looking bottles. I nodded, and he unscrewed the ornate cap from one of the bottles to add some fragrant liquid to the water. Immediately, the room filled with the aromatic scent of cedar wood.

It was round about then I realised I was going to have to undress in order to have a bath, and I had a feeling he wasn’t the type to leave while I did so.

I stood uncertainly near the door, and watched him warily.

I argued silently with myself. I’d only known him a few days, and he’d already turned me into a vampire, so how much worse could it get?

The bath filled up quickly, a little too quickly for my liking, and then he was coming toward me. His mocking look was back as he stood in front of me, hands resting on his slim hips.

‘Shy Elinor?’ He asked, surprising me by using my name.

‘Where I come from, ladies have their baths alone,’ I replied.

‘Then I shall go and find you some other clothes while you get in the bath,’ he said, with a courteous gesture of hands, and I nodded again, feeling relieved.

He went out through a second door, opposite the one we had entered, and I hastily stripped off my filthy jeans, both sweatshirts, and underwear. I stepped tentatively into the warm, frothy water and sat down, making sure the bubbles covered absolutely everything from my chin down. The feel of the warm, foamy water against my cold, sensitive skin was overwhelming, and I closed my eyes as I gave myself up to the somewhat erotic sensation.

Will came back in, carrying faded blue jeans and a dark-blue jumper. I didn’t want to ask about underwear. Best not to mention underwear at this point.

‘How is the water?’

‘Wonderful,’ I wondered if he was just going to stand there and watch me. His presence seemed to fill the room and I sank lower under the water.

‘I take it you would not be too keen on company in the bath.’

‘Don’t even think about it.’

He smiled. This was all going to go to hell in a minute. I could feel it.

He squatted down beside the bath, trailing his hand lazily in the bubbles. I moved backwards carefully, away from his hand, trying not to disturb the bubbles too much, and felt suddenly grateful that the bath was so huge.

He watched me, his green eyes glinting.

‘I could, however, wash your hair for you,’ he offered.

I looked at him suspiciously then, and he laughed.

‘I would like to say I do not bite,’ he said, ‘however, you definitely know it is not the case.’

I desperately wanted my hair to feel clean and tangle-free again, but I didn’t trust him an inch. He leaned his arms on the side of the bath and looked at me, as he raised his eyebrows.

‘So … little Elinor … do you trust me with your lovely red hair?’

‘I would love clean hair,’ I said. ‘Just don’t try anything.’

His lips quirked upwards.

It was all going to go horribly wrong if he attempted any kind of seduction routine on me. I wasn’t even sure I would be able to tolerate his hands in my hair, let alone anywhere else. He moved behind me and my whole body tensed as his fingers touched my hair. I felt his palms gently cupping water over the tangled mass, and then those strong, sure fingers began to massage shampoo into my hair and scalp. My body gradually began to unwind as the tension left it, and I closed my eyes, allowing myself to relax properly for the first time in what felt like months. He rinsed off the shampoo thoroughly, and ran his fingers through my hair, gently straightening out the tangles.

Lightly, teasingly, his hands suddenly slid down my bare shoulders. His touch made me gasp, and my skin tingled like ice and fire together where his fingers had been. He softly kissed the back of my neck – a gentle, fluttering kiss like a velvet butterfly winging its way down my body.

I moved away from him, with one violent shove that sent the water sloshing around to reveal more of my upper body than I was happy with.

‘How did I know you would take advantage?’ I said scathingly. ‘Dead or alive, men are all the same.’

‘So call me predictable.’ He held up his hands in mock surrender as he stood. His t-shirt was soaked, and clung rather distractingly to his muscular body. I averted my gaze quickly and for once felt safer with him standing.

‘You enjoyed my company once,’ he sighed.

As I couldn’t even remember where I’d even met him, I found his remark somewhat confusing.

‘Even if we’d met under different circumstances, I very much doubt I’d have found you even passably attractive,’ I lied.

He arched an eyebrow at that. ‘We did, and I can assure you, I was not found wanting.’

So why can’t I remember?

I had sunk right down in the water again to ensure the bubbles came right up to my neck. There was no way on this earth I would get out of the bath with him still in the room.

‘Let me show you my world,’ he said, once again changing the subject. ‘Our world.’

‘I want to get dry and dressed first. In private.’

‘So shy,’ he mocked me again. ‘How very refreshing.’

He inclined his head at me before he left through the opposite door again, closing it firmly behind him. I waited for a few minutes, half-expecting him to return at any moment. When he didn’t, I got out of the bath, and hurriedly wrapped myself in a towel. I dried and dressed quickly with shaking hands. The clothes he’d chosen were my own, and I was glad of the familiarity, although how he’d come by them I couldn’t remember. I was glad he had supplied underwear too, although I wasn’t sure how I felt about him actually handling it. A strange feeling clenched at my lower body at the thought, and I tried to ignore it in a wave of foreboding.

‘Do you want to bring the rest of your clothes?’

I was sitting on the floor in my flat, leaning against my wardrobe door. Will had pulled a holdall from the top of the wardrobe and was stuffing clothes into it. I watched him put my life into a bag and still I did nothing. Why wasn’t I running away?

‘Let us go, little vampire’

A brief baring of his white teeth in a semblance of a smile and I began to shake my head again and again, no … no … I would not go anywhere with this man.

I blinked several times and the elegant bathroom swam back into focus. Where had that memory come from? When had Will been in my flat packing my clothes? That he had, in fact, packed my clothes was evident because I was wearing them. God I wanted my brain back. I was beginning to accept I couldn’t ever have my old life back, but surely recovering more of my memories would help me get through this bizarre time. Although now that I had bathed, my hair was clean and I wore clean clothes, I actually felt better for the first time in … How long had it been?

My body felt strong, athletic. Coiled and ready for … For what? I usually felt like this when I’d had a good rehearsal and the adrenaline was pumping around my body in anticipation of the next performance. I towelled my hair as dry as possible and looked around for a comb or a brush.

Will came back in at exactly that moment, looking devastatingly handsome in black jeans and a dark-red shirt. I pushed that thought out of my head immediately. No man had the right to look that sexy. He handed me a silver-backed hairbrush and I looked at him in amazement. How had he known?

‘I have been around a very long time,’ he said, answering my thoughts. ‘I think I know when a lady needs a hairbrush.’

I took the brush and began to ease it through my tangled hair, when, without warning, he took the brush back from me, my nerveless fingers giving no resistance.

‘Permit me.’

He brushed my hair back from my face, watching me all the time. Gradually he brushed out all of the tangles, easing the brush through the full length of my hair. Finally, putting the brush down, he ran his hands through the silky thickness of it, his gaze lingering on my face. Oh this man was good. Centuries of practice, I supposed.

‘So beautiful,’ he murmured, almost to himself. ‘I hope you never tie it up.’

‘Only for work.’ I realised I’d replied almost without thinking.

His long black eyelashes lowered over his eyes seductively, just for a moment, but it was enough to make my body clench again. Just what the hell was happening to me? I bent down and pulled on my trainers, using the action to cover my confusion. I was more at ease when we were arguing, and it seemed suddenly odd to be having a near normal conversation with the man who’d murdered me. Brought me over. Sired me. Whatever.

‘What’s through there?’ I asked, motioning toward the opposite door.

‘Maybe some night you will find out.’

14 February

Elinor is in my bath as I write, and the urge to just go in and claim her is overwhelming. To think of her just two rooms away, naked, is tantamount to torture. But I have vowed not to rush her in any way. She is not like any of the other women I have met in the last fifty years or so, and she is certainly not like other vampire women. For this, I am grateful, and my intention is to keep her thus. She has retained a certain innocence and vulnerability, and must therefore be protected. The thought of any man taking advantage of her fills me with feelings I had thought long dead, buried along with my human existence.

One of the advantages of being immortal is that there is no need for haste, and I am prepared to bide my time. Elinor needs to be made aware that physical entertainment is not my main criteria, although one day it will be most welcome and, I have no doubt, enjoyable. There are other factors to consider and resolve first.

We are about to take a walk and I rejoice at the progress that has been made.