“Absolutely not,” Campbell bellowed before I could get a word in edgewise.
I gaped at him along with half of the table. Clearly, this had not been run by him before Santi just blurted it out. And Campbell’s vehemence was so strong that I had no idea what to say. He didn’t want me to do any more videos? He hadn’t been against it when he was tricked into doing the first one.
“What the fuck, bro?” Santi asked.
“We’re keeping Blaire out of this.”
Viv rolled her eyes. “Why don’t we ask the lady what she prefers? She has a brain, Campbell Soup. I think she can make up her own mind.”
“Who told you to do more videos? Was it Bobby?” Campbell demanded right over Viv’s comments.
“Yes,” Yorke said, perfectly monosyllabic.
“Look, Bobby suggested that while we’re here, we use it as publicity,” Santi reasoned. “The girl already has an audience that is expecting you.”
“That girl has a name,” I finally got out. “It’s Blaire. And I’m sitting right fucking here.”
“My apologies,” Santi said with a half-bow in her direction. From Santi, it wasn’t even mocking. He was utterly sincere about it. “Our manager, Bobby Rogers…”
“I met him,” I said.
“Well, he thinks you’d be a valid resource to use. You’re already here. He doesn’t have to send a team.”
“Because I declined a fucking team,” Campbell grumbled under his breath.
“Campbell refuses to get on social, but he’ll do videos for you,” Santi finished. “If you want to do them, we’d be up for it.”
“The first video caused her enough problems. I told Bobby not to involve her in any of this.”
“Well, you don’t get to make all the decisions for the entire band,” Viv piped up.
“No, but—”
“Or for me,” Blaire added, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Blaire,” I said reasonably, “think about what happened on the Fourth of July. I don’t want you to be more involved with this if it’s going to put you in danger.”
“What did happen?” Viv asked curiously.
“She was attacked by a group of Campbell Soup girls.”
“You said yourself, that almost never happens. And I wasn’t expecting it. I would be more cautious now.”
His face crumpled as he realized that I was arguing with him about this. Because he hadn’t considered that this would be one of the coolest things I’d ever done in my entire career. Sure, I mostly focused on wellness on Blaire Blush, but making videos was part of my job. I could do so much good.
“You want to do this?” Campbell finally asked.
“I want to consider it before you throw it out without asking my opinion.”
He nodded slowly and then slumped back into his chair. “All right.”
“Can we eat now?” Yorke asked, gesturing to the pies that had just been placed on the table. Someone must have ordered a bunch of pizzas for the entire table while we were all arguing.
Eve grabbed the first piece with a muffled, “Y’all are dramatic.”
The rest of the table cracked up, and the spell was broken. Campbell still brooded through most of dinner, but the band had no such qualms. And by the end, everyone was enamored with Santi and Viv’s banter and even Yorke’s deep voice and impenetrable eyes.
I waved Annie and Jen off as they headed toward their respective boyfriend’s car.
Piper held up the key to the Jeep. “I’ll get it running. You going to be long?”
I glanced back at Campbell, who waited outside while Viv smoked with Eve. Santi stood beside them like a hopeful puppy. I needed to talk to Campbell. That much had been certain before he flipped his shit over the videos. I needed to talk to him even more now.
“Yeah, I hope not.”
“Good luck.”
“Thanks.”
Campbell glanced up from where he was standing just far enough away from the smoke to not inhale it outright. His eyes found mine, and I met his stare straight on. He said something to his friends and then strode over to where I was standing.
“Hey,” he said, running a hand back through his hair. “Sorry about…” He trailed off and gestured around him. “I don’t know. Everything.”
“Look, I think we just need to talk. I’ve been running away long enough, but it sort of looks like you’re here to stay for a bit, and I’m…somehow in your life again.”
“I don’t mind that,” he admitted with a small smile.
I gulped at the way that smile sent butterflies flipping around my stomach. He liked having me here. God, that shouldn’t have made me turn into a simpering idiot. “I don’t…mind that either.”
His eyebrows shot up his forehead. “Really? Because you kind of ran away on Sunday.”
“I did,” I said, toeing the gravel at my feet. “Sunday was overwhelming.”
“I’m not sorry I kissed you.”
I laughed. “I’m well aware.”
He took another step closer to me. I swallowed and tilted my head up to look into that gorgeous face. The person who had turned my world upside down and shattered it in the next breath.
“But I don’t want to be the reason you run ever again.”
My knees wobbled at those words. “I don’t think you can promise that.”
“I’m not the same person I was eight years ago.”
Tears pricked my eyes, and I glanced down. “Me either.”
Losing him had made me careful. It had made me hesitant. It had made me think before I leaped. I didn’t know how not to be that person. Especially with his beautiful face looking down at me so earnestly.
“Why don’t we just…try to start over?” I offered.
He accepted it for the olive branch it was. “I’d like that.” Then, he sighed softly. “Look, you don’t have to do those videos just because my manager asked.”
“Have you considered that I might want to?”
“No,” he admitted.
“You seem adamantly against it.”
“I’m not. I’m just…” He bit the inside of his cheek, shifting from foot to foot and fidgeting, as he always had. That nervous energy crackled through him. Nowadays, he channeled it onto the stage, but before, it had come out like this. “I want to protect you. When you called me, crying, I freaked the fuck out. It reminded me so much of when the police called the night my mom died.”
“Campbell,” I whispered.
“It’s not the same. I know it isn’t. But the instant it happened, I knew that I’d do anything to keep you safe. And the deeper you get involved with me, the more you post videos, the more you let LA weasel in here, into your Lubbock sanctuary, the less I can do about it.”
Despite myself, I put my hand on his arm. He jumped at the touch. “You don’t have to protect me. What happened Sunday was a surprise. I didn’t know that sort of thing could happen. I’ll be more careful now. I won’t be alone.”
“Fuck, I hate that you have to think like that now.”
“It might never even happen again,” I told him. “And I don’t think I should decide everything based on a what-if. Sunday was a lot, but I want to do this, Campbell. I’ve already gotten several offers for things like being on the Today show and a speaking tour for Blaire Blush.”
His eyes lit up with pride. “Really? Blaire, that’s incredible.”
I flushed, true to my namesake. “I actually wanted to ask about how to navigate it. I need help and thought you might know someone.”
“Oh yeah? Like a publicist? I know someone great. She’s New York–based now, but before she moved, we hung out a lot in LA. She’s great. Let me give you her contact. Just tell her I sent you.”
He sent me a text, and my phone dinged. A name and number came up on my phone—Anna English, English & Bhardwaj PR.
“She goes by English,” Campbell told me.
“Well, that was…easier than I’d thought.” I shoved my phone away with a promise to message English tomorrow.
He shrugged. “I have contacts. I just want to make sure this is what you want. I remember when all you wanted was to disappear.”
“I got rid of that girl when you left,” I whispered. “After everything happened, I decided that I didn’t want to disappear ever again.”
As if he couldn’t stop himself from touching me, he brushed my hair behind my ear. “Then, go take over the world. I can’t wait to watch it happen.”
And he was so sincere that it took everything in me to step out of his embrace instead of crushing my lips to his.