James and Mary walked into Pastor Shepherd’s office and sat down. They had come to the conclusion they needed help. As often happens following a tragedy in a family, their relationship had become strained, with tension building to the point they had begun taking their frustrations out on each other. James struggled with sleeplessness as the loss of Jed brought back painful memories of the friends he had lost in Vietnam. Mary recognized James’s sense of loss but felt he didn’t care about her own loss of her son. Both knew their feelings were irrational but didn’t know how to handle matters.
Pastor Shepherd spoke with them about the stages of grief and in particular how theirs was so much different than in the case of death. They had no closure, and the constant reminders of Jed’s absence were compounded by the hope he might be found alive. Pastor Shepherd’s experience as a chaplain in the Army and extensive dealings with PTSD were crucial for dealing with James. After talking and praying together, James and Mary walked from his office holding hands, determined to weather the storm together. It would not be easy—losing a son never is—but they, with God’s help, were determined to make it.