THE WISDOM OF INSECURITY

Not wanting to die was another universal constant, it seemed.

J. Robert Oppenheimer

Place names are bleeding slowly from my mind

till nothing is left but

Uruguay – which someone told me once

means ‘river of birds’

in the language of those who were killed

to make it ours.

I think of the symbols they made

on slices of doeskin or bark, when they went

upriver, as we all do when defeat

is casually dishonoured by the ones

who tricked us, flag-white egrets in the trees

flailing from branch to branch as the boat slides past,

but silent, like a person who has learned

to do without the self as worthy foe,

settling, instead, for something in the night

that tracks him from afar, some faint device

unspooling in an empty Nissen hut,

the data insufficient to predict

a future he could happily imagine,

no universal constant, no dark matter,

only a spill of cipher across the floor,

mile after mile of wavelength, feigning desire.